Through The Dark(Niall Horan)
Spill Your Heart Out
Everything seemed to crash around me when Niall placed his lips on mine. Honestly the way he made me feel left me terrified. The way his voice sounded when he said he wanted to be with me...my head just couldn't wrap around it. So many things were going in my mind. First off, even my father knew Niall was in love with me? Why am I always the last to know things? Second, I've kissed my best friend twice today. Third, he just said he wanted to be with me, but I'm just staring at him. Right, Teagan speak. But what do I say?
I stood up from the bench and tried to make words. “I..” Come on Teagan, you can do it. “I can't.” was all I said before I ran off towards the hotel.
I couldn't, right? Niall and I's friendship was special. A relationship would only ruin it. Or it could make it better, I guess? Right? I mean, he was a damn good kisser. And we could cuddle, and I could make him dinner and I sure as hell wouldn't have to go home again. I could just be with Niall, and be happy. But what if we weren't right for each other? What if something went wrong? What if he found someone better and didn't want me anymore? I would lose my best friend and my boyfriend. I would have nothing.
I didn't have much time to process any of my thoughts before I heard Alis and Perrie knocking on the door. I groaned and pulled myself off of the bed and made my way to the door.
“Teagan! I know you're in there!” Alis sang from the other side of the door. “Open up! We brought ice cream and stuff for facials!”
“Yeah and Alis is making me carry it all so open up!” Perrie chimed in.
I laughed to myself and opened the door. Within seconds they both rushed in and put everything down on the bed. “Tonight is going to be so much fun!” Alis smiled, grabbing all of the ingredients for whatever face mask she was going to make.
Perrie plopped down onto the bed and opened a bag of chips and started to munch. “So where did you run off to earlier?” she asked placing a chip in her mouth.
I sighed and sat down on the bed next to her. Do I tell them about Niall and I or do I just say I needed air? I mean Alis and Perrie were my best friends, besides Niall. It would be nice to get someone elses point of view on things, I suppose. “I kissed Niall.”
“What?” Alis and Perrie both yelled. “When? Where? Was it good?” were Alis' follow up questions.
I ran my fingers through my hair. “Earlier, before we went out. I don't know. It just happened and he didn't say anything about it so I felt weird sitting there at the restaurant. When he followed me to the park, he sat down and told me all this stuff my dad said to him. He said my dad knew that he loved me almost as much as he did and then he kissed me and-”
Alis cut me off. “Wait, even your dad knew Niall was in love with you?”
“Apparently everyone but me knew.” I sighed and laid back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. “After he kissed me he said he wanted to be with me.” I admitted.
Perrie put the bag of chips down and laid so she was next to me. “What did you say?” she asked, turning her head to look at me.
I kept my eyes on the ceiling. “I said I can't, and then I ran away.”
She turned me down. The only girl I've looked at for the last three years, turned me down. I told her I wanted to be with her and she said she can't. She can't what? Be with me? Love me? Let me love her? I sighed as I made my way back to the hotel. I couldn't believe this. Everyone was always telling me to just tell her, and when I finally do she says no.
I walked past her room, I could hear her laughing with Alis and Perrie. I smiled, finally being able to hear her laugh. It felt like it had been ages. But then it sunk in that it wasn't me making her laugh, and she didn't want to be with me. What if she left? What if she went back to London? What if I lost her for good, because it was too weird being friends with someone who was in love with you? What would I do? I couldn't let that happen.
I raised my hand and knocked on the door. “Oh that must be the pizza!” I heard Perrie cheer.
“I'll get it!” It was Teagan. She was going to open the door and I was going to spill my heart out to her.
She opened the door, her face was covered in some weird green crap and her smile slowly faded, because she saw me. “Oh, hi Niall.”
“I know you're having a girls night and I'm sorry to interrupt but I really needed to say this.” I paused, trying to keep it together and looked at her again. “I know you said you can't be with me, but I think you're wrong. I think you can, you're just scared. I just want you to know that I will wait for you. I've waited three years, I'll wait three thousand. You mean absolutely everything to me Teagan. I haven't even looked at another girl the way I look at you in the last three years. I knew from the moment I met you that you were special. That you were the girl that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.”
I'm sorry all! I've been busy again, with it being the holiday season and all. Between work, family gatherings and having a killer cold I haven't had time to write.
I promise I'll make it up to all of you.
Thank you to all of my lovely viewers/subscribers. I love you all.