Through The Dark

Me and the girls met almost every day the next two weeks, scrambling around all over most of England to find all the things we have all selected. I’ve hidden most of the wedding plans from Harry, only revealing to him the location (for obvious reasons) and the color scheme. He seemed pleased that he was left with the one and only duty of finding our honey moon place.

“I can’t believe it’s just three weeks away.” I mummer against Harry chest as he pulled the covers over us.

“I’m excited.” he says, the smile in his voice obvious.

“Me too.” I sighed, laying happily beside my soon to be husband.

“Um, Nichole. You do realize tha Diana’s grave is going to be put in this weekend, right?” He asked cautiously.

“Yeah, I know. I’ll be okay, baby. I promise. I’ll probably cry but I’m not going to space out anymore.” I say, using his bare chest as a prop to look at him. He gave me a small smile.

“Okay, baby. I believe you.” He said, twisting a strand of hair before placing it behind my ear.

“Good. I love you.” I say, kissing him lightly on the lips.

“I love you too.” he said, chuckling as I kissed the tip of his nose.

“I love you most.”

*************************************

“Are you ready?” Niall asked, tapping on the door.

I nodded my head and took in a shaky breath. It’s just burying an empty baby casket and then putting in the headstone. There’s no actual body, just an empty casket, I remind myself. My body didn’t listen to my words, my stomach doing flips. I can’t space out, not so close to the wedding. I took another deep breath and pretended to fuss with my black dress.

“We will be leaving in a few minutes, princess.” Niall said before leaving me alone.

We all agreed to dress in the formal and respectful all black tradition for Diana’s coffin burial. I know she’s not really in there but I feel like I can cry just thinking about it. I take one last wary look in the mirror before mentally putting my big girl panties on and walking out of my room.

Everybody was already gather in the living room, prepared to leave. Dylan and Darcy were in their little black outfits, making my heart clench. The poor things don’t even know what’s going on.

“You ready, babe?” Harry said, scaring me as he appeared out of no where.

“Yeah, let’s go before I’m not.” I mutter, grabbing Darcy to help calm my nerves.

I fiddled with her dress the entire time on the way there, focusing on not freaking her about by busting out in tears. Harry was quiet the entire ride, giving me my space and the peace to be able to think without being pressured into it. God, I love him. So, so, so much.

An hour passed as I was staring at the newly dug grave, tears streaming down my face. Harry held me tightly against him as the coffin was lowered in. I stepped forward and took a single white rose that was handed to me, laying it carefully on the lid as it was slowly took in by the wet dirt.

I returned to my spot by Harry’s side, nodding up at him as he asked if I was okay still. I gave him a shaky smile and pecked him on the lips, my attention shifting towards the grave. I watched in half curiosity, half sadness as they began to fill in the grave, covering the tiny coffin we had chosen. I wiped at my face, proud of my decision to not wear any makeup. That would have been disastrous.

“It’s time to go, love.” Harry said, tugging me back as I watched the headstone be put in.

I had chosen what went on it, along with the day I found out about her and the day she was taken from me. Beside those dates were the cursive words I had carefully chose. It didn’t mean much to anybody else but to me, these simple words were everything right now.

Notes