I Understand. An AU/punk story.

Harry hold me in his stone tight grip for a long time. He squeezes me and kisses me and doesn't move an inch... After i'm not sure how long he falls asleep. I don't understand how that's even possible but he manages. I stay there in his grip, starring at the ceiling for a long time...... Who would do this?

As I lay there I hear a little chime. My phone, signaling a text.

From: Louis!(:

Hey, are you all OK? None of the other guys will text me back. Word is there was a fight...

I glare at the text. He had no right to know after all of the shit he has pulled. Going in to my contacts I change his name in my phone to Louis>:( I toss the phone on the bed and turn my attention back to Harry. Smoothing his hair back I take a look at his head. He has a nasty cut going in to his hair line with a big bruise surrounding it. I kiss it lightly and he winces in his sleep. Even though hes not awake he still looks so sad...

A little while after I realized I was incredibly thirsty, I crawl from his arms gently and tuck a pillow where my body just lay, to ensure he doesn't wake up.

Going in to the kitchen I find my four friends. The girls run at me again and bring me in to their arms. I squeeze them for so long my arms start to hurt.

"I honestly though you were s -shot." Perri stammers, finally letting go she goes back to Zayn's hold.

"yeah, the lights came on and you were just... no where." Lauren adds....

"Josh found me and brought me through the window in the basement... I went around back and flipped the fuse and shot the lock..." I made sure to leave the part out where Josh tried to make me leave them.

"Oh my gosh..... Lily.. You saved us!" Zayn splutters. I frown and shake my head and sniffle.

"The only reason that happened was because of me.... They were after me.." I say sadly, going to the fridge and pouring myself some iced tea. Before they can protest we here Harry.

"Lilian?" His voice is faint but still full of worry. I turn and head my bedroom.

"Wait! We're going to the hospital in about an hour. Rae and Niall will be coming out of surgery." Liam says. I nod and hurry to my room. Harry is sitting up in bed. I put my cup on the night stand and before I can even try to get on the bed he grabs my hands and pulls me up.

"Why did you leave? I woke and you were gone.." He says sadly..

"I'm sorry I was thirsty and I couldn't sleep." I mumble, as I crawl on to his lap. He nods and holds my hips.

"I'm sorry I left you awake... I was really tired.."

"It's fine. Don't apologize... It was a terrible night..." He nods and drops his head. I put my hands on his shoulders and start squeezing gently, giving him a back massage. He moans under my touch.

"They're going to the hospital... are we going to go?" I ask as I move my hands down to his biceps, rubbing them too.

"Yeah I really need too. Need to check on everyone that was hurt." I nod and lean my head on his shoulder.

"I need to go take a shower first..."

"Me too..."

"Harry?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"Will you shower with me? I don't wanna be alone...." I mumble. My cheeks flush red.

"Of course I will." His tone lightening slightly.

"But I don't wanna have sex.." I sigh sadly.

"I wouldn't right now even if you wanted too.... And its perfectly OK that you don't." I know hes telling the truth so I feel a little better yet I still feel weird we haven't had sex yet.. not weird actually almost guilty....

He puts his hands on my upper thighs and holds me to him, heading towards the bathroom he flicks on the light, locking the door, he goes tot he shower and turns it on.

Even though I wan't to have this moment with him, I'm still feeling little butterflies in my stomach. Harry turns to me and in two strides, eliminates the space between us.

"Are you sure you want to, doll?" I nod and give him a small smile. He smiles back and takes his shirt off. I play with my fingers when he does the same with his jeans and socks. "Need some help?" He asks, a light smile playing on his lips. I nod and blush. He chuckles and kisses my forehead, taking the hem of my shirt in his grip, Harry peels my top over my head.

Leaning down slightly he unbuttons my jeans and slides them down my legs. I hang on to his shoulders for balance when he peels them off of my ankles. Straightening my back, he takes my tiny hand in his and leads me to the shower.

Stopping right in front of it he takes my hips and pulls my to him gently, leaning his head in to my neck.

"I love you so much. words can't describe." My heart flutters.

"Harry I love you too...." He smiles in to my skin.

"Ready?" I nod and his hands travel up my back and then unclip my bra with ease. Letting it fall to the floor. He doesn't really look though... that's not why we're doing this. We're doing this because we don't want to be alone. His sands run all the ways down my sides and then grab the lace of my thong, pulling it down as he did my jeans. We climb in the shower and I let the hot water run down my chest as he holds my waist from behind, placing his chin on top of my head.

I take the hand he holds out and he spins me, I lean my head back, letting the water soak my hair. I sigh happily when his head once again leans in to my neck. Straightening myself up we switch spots and I run my fingers through his curls, making sure to get his head wet. He closes his eyes when I do that. Harry loves when I play with his hair.

When we're all wet I grab the shampoo and squeeze a drop on his head, scratching it in and washing it out. I can't help but chuckle as he stands there. He returns the favor and find himself laughing. We repeat with conditioner and then I get my favorite strawberry smoothie body wash.

I take a little bit in my hands, lather it, and spread my hands down his chest and fit abs. It makes me squirm and even a little wet to be touching him but now is not the time for that stuff. I motion for him to spin then work the soap in to his shoulders and back.

He grins wickedly when its his turn. I swallow but allow him to get some body wash and start at my shoulders. Rubbing it in his hands play down my chest, over my breasts and then in one movement, go under them, cupping them slightly. Squeezing them, his thumb going lightly over my nipples. I can't help but moan.

"Harry, please?" I whimper. He furrows his brow.. "Not now, baby. I'm already wet." He sighs and apologizes before rubbing the soap on to my tummy and back. I rinse off and get that same guilty feeling again...

We pat ourselves dry. Even though he just saw me naked, I get dressed in my room.

"Hey are you OK?" He asks, coming from the bathroom as I braid my hair on the bed. I nod once. "Please don't lie, Lilian." he stand in front of me and picks my chin up so I can see him.

"Nothing, I lie." Before he can argue with me Zayn comes in.

"We're heading to the hospital. You guys coming?'' I nod and lead Harry from my room.

-

"Hi, bae!" I coo, tears falling over as the girls and I make our way in to Rae's room. Shes pale and hooked up to a billion wires. She smiles.

"Hi"

"We were so worried, hunny. We aren't leaving until you do!" Lauren gushes.

We sit and talk for a long time. The guys are in Niall's room. After about two hours, even though everyones exhausted, we switch rooms.

"Hi, pretty ladies." Drugged up Niall mumbles. We laugh and come in next to his bed. Babying him like we no the boys weren't.

Niall was shot in the leg so he would be out pretty soon. All he needed was to get the bullet removed and let the wound heal a little more. Rae was shot in the gut. It missed everything major but the surgery was a lot longer than his and the recovery would be a lot longer. Not long, both of their sets of parents came and we bid our goodbyes for the night, wanting to give them space.

As we went t the main door I remembered I forgot my cell in Niall's room.

"Damn, I'll be right back." I mumble. Harry has been a little short with me since my rejection in the shower. I hurry back to his room, grab it, say goodbye agaiinnnnn. But this time as I went down the hallway towards the elevator I noticed something. A lamp on in a room. I looked in our of curiosity and say a mess of black hair.

I freeze.

Martin.

I run in to his room, he jumps at first but gives me a lazy smile the next. He looks a lot shittier than my other two friends.

"Hey.."

"Hey." He says back in a hoarse voice.. "Listen, I'm sorry.. -"

"Don't apologize... You weren't going too. I know you weren't. You tried ot help me and I owe you for it." I smile and sit on the side of his bed. My phone buzzes.

From: Harry<3

Are you coming??

"Hold on a second."

"Is it Harry?" His voice is full of nervousness.

"Yeah but he doesn't know anything about you.. don't worry." I pat his leg and turn to my phone.

To: Harry<3

In a minute.

"I think I should go, but I'll come back tomorrow. OK?" He smiles at me and nods. "Here whats your number?" He gives it to me. I squeeze his hand once more before leaving. While waiting for the elevator, when the doors open. Harry is standing there with a worried look on his face. I go to his side and lean against the wall, pressing ground floor.

"Everything alright?" He mumbles, leaning against the wall opposite. I nod but don't meed his eyes. He knows when I lie...

-

We're all back at the house, the sun has just risen and I haven't slept for 24 hours. None of us have minus Harry. He has a cup of scotch with his feet on the table while he sits on the couch. The other couples on the chairs and couch. I can barely keep my eyes open as I sit next to him.... Liam is talking but I'm not listening. Perri is asleep on Zayn and Lauren for some reason is not sleepy at all it seems.

"Why don't you lay down and put your head on my lap?" Harry mumbles quietly, I turn to him, he looks just as shitty as I do.. if not worse but his eyes are covered with concern. I nod lightly and lay next to him. Getting comfortable, I rest my head on his upper thigh, my hair fanning on his lap. His hand smoothes my hair and cups my cheek while the guys talk.

"No counting Niall, ten of us were injured." Zayn corrects Liam.

"At least none were killed." Lauren adds. We all nod. "Can't say the rest for the other guys..."

I didn't know anyone had been killed.

"I'm sorry you guys..." I say suddenly. Harry looks down at me.

"Why?" Liam asks, cocking his head.

"They wanted me... it must of been Jake's gang again.... nothing else makes sense.."

"That's what I thought at first but I have never seen any of those men before. It was probably some lame ass one trying to get to Harry through you. It's not your fault." Zayn reassures me. I sigh and shrug. Harry pulls the blanket off the couch and draped it over me. My phones buzzes.

From:Louis>:(

I know you're pissed but I still care about you.... Please tell someone to let me know whats up. You guys are still my friends.

I groan and feel Harry reading the text over my shoulder. His body grows tense. I know I will get a talking to later but right now I don't care.... I'm formulating a plan...

Well little do they know. I'm going to find out which game all with the help of a young boy named Martin

Notes

loong chapter??