One Thousand Songs Later

Lily's POV:

"I-I don't know where to start." I said. Luke hugged me again, turned to face me and placed his hands in mine.

"Just start from the beginning and know, that you're not going to get hurt, as long as you're with me." Luke said and kissed my forehead sincerely. Giving him a small nod, I took a shaky breath.

"Well, I was taking a walk because I hadn't exercised in a week and my muscles were really stiff, and I stopped at some grass and laid there, just relaxing. After a while a truck pulled up and you're brother, Kyle, got out." I felt Luke's grip on my hand tighten and I gulped; Luke motioned for me to continue.

"He forced something down my throat and I slowly began to lose conscious. I-I remember him picking me up and putting him in the truck but the next thing I remember was being in a crate." My breathing quickened, talking about this was most definitely not beneficial for my health.

"When I had woken up in the crate, I was thirsty and a water bottle was set in the crate for me. I drank some of the water, only to realize later that wasn't water. I lost conscious again and woke up in the crate, drenched with sweat. I remember panicking-" Suddenly, an enormous shiver ran through my body. I could hear myself explaining more to Luke, but I had zoned out of my own conversation.

What is going on? I thought, panicked, when my sight blurred. When my vision cleared, I saw the beautiful house Kyle and I stayed at. Of course, anyone would say it was beautiful, with designer patterns and expensive-smelling shampoo, and just off the coast of Senegal, but for me, it was anything but beautiful.

That house was like a prison to me. Except, it was sugar coated with luxurious beds and enormous windows that you could watch the sun set from. It could've been paradise.

If I was on vacation.

Kyle made my life a living hell in that house on the beach. Those luxurious beds? I never once slept in a bed, Kyle always locked me up in the bathroom, in fear of someone coming in. And if I was caught for sleeping in a bed by Kyle, I was punished.

Those windows? I never once saw one, never mind watching the sunset, Kyle always closed the shades or always used the cars with blacked-out windows. And if I was caught trying to peek out the window, I was punished.

Of course, Kyle would always let me use a bedroom if I was entertaining a client.

"What do you mean by client?" I faintly heard Luke ask. Once again, my sight blurred but when it focused again, I almost began crying from who I saw.

Tony. Those four letters were enough to make me cower in a corner. Tony was my first, he was the one that Kyle had so carefully chosen. He was decent looking and relatively young, 18 when I was 14, and he was the closest thing I had to a friend.

Until he found out. Tony knew from the start there was something suspicious going on, he knew by the way I acted towards - well towards my job, that I didn't do it free willingly. He had asked me everyone time I winced or shuddered why I was doing this. At first, I had refused to tell him, terrified that Kyle would do something horrible, but then, by accident, when I was at my most vulnerable and weakest point, I had let it slip.

Tony had tried helping me escape, but Kyle figured it out and without hesitation, shot him to death. We had left Dakar, Senegal that very night.

From then on, Kyle trusted me with absolutely nothing and he started punishing me more because I began resisting more. The first year, I was only in Senegal, by the second, I had visited four continents, and by the third, I had visited all seven (besides Antarctica) twice, and we relocated at least every week.

"How did you travel? Were you always in the crate?"

When the scene shifted, it shifted to me on treadmills and working with weights, jump roping, swimming - anything to keep me at a painfully thin 92 pounds. The first few times I was forced into an extreme workouts, it had been very difficult to cope, but I gradually got used to running for hours on end on the treadmill.

I only had to use the crate if we were flying somewhere and we only flew once a month, giving us thirty days to explore each continent on the road. Kyle always drove in a car with blacked out windows and automatic locks. He never rolled down the windows, not even in the sweltering summer when the air conditioner wasn't completely working.

"Lily! Lily!" Luke snapped his fingers in front of my face and pulled me out of my trance.

"Lily! What's wrong with you? Your eyes keep glazing over and you're speaking in a weird faraway voice!" I shook my head, trying to clear the strange flashbacks.

"I'm sorry, some stuff just popped into my head. I'm not sure what happened." I said.

"You're fine now, but you didn't answer my question about what clients meant, you just talked about Tony and how he was your first. First what?"

"Wait, I was talking?" I asked, confusedly.

"Yeah..."

I thought they were just thoughts in my mind.

"So who was Tony?" Luke prodded. I blinked.

"He was . . ." I ran my hands through my hair, trying to find the right word, ". . . a friend."

I stared down at me hands, struggling not to start bawling, I didn't expect to ever talk about Tony again; it was too hard.

"Lily, what do you mean by, 'he was you're first'"? I bit my lip. I didn't even have to look up to know that Luke's jaw was clenched and his knuckles were white.

"When I was with Kyle, I . . . I . . . " I can't say it, I thought. Luke would think so low of me everything would go down the drain, our relationship, my pride, my everything.

"Lily, what did Kyle make you do?" Luke whispered horsely. His expression had a mix of emotions displayed, ranging from scared to jealously to anger. Wait jealously?

"TELL ME!" Luke practically screamed. I forgot about jealousy and I looked fearfully up at Luke, who looked like he was on the brink of punching me. I couldn't hold it in any longer, tears escaped from my eyes. I hated that after I would say these words, Luke would no longer love me, he would treat me like I was, like I really am.

"I was a prostitute." I whispered, eyes closed, and yet the tears kept coming.

I turned over, and sobbed into my pillow. Luke's going to leave me now. What did you expect? A little voice in my head asked. I didn't tell the police what had happened just because I was afraid of someone getting hurt, I was also scared of what everyone would think of me.

Of the things I've done.

Of the things I'm capable of.

Louis and Eleanor would most likely be repulsed and kick me out of their house, Luke would probably wonder why he spent three years pining over a girl who knew all the tricks of getting men sexually aroused from ages 14-46.

I could hear Luke angrily pushing things over and hitting the walls, but I didn't want to look up, I wouldn't be able to meet his eyes. I wanted to curl up into a ball and die, that would be the best for everyone.

Louis and Eleanor can forget about their slut-daughter, and focus on Leo, Luke could find a nice girl, who actually deserves his kindness, and I can rejoin my family. Everyone wins.

I noticed how quiet it was and concluded that Luke must of left. I weekly sat up and wiped away the hairs that were stuck to my face, due to the mass of tears that had escaped.

So much for promising never to cry again.

I slowly turned around and was shocked to see Luke, siting on the other side of the bed, in the same fetal position I was just in, tear stains streamed down his cheeks. He looked up at me, his bloodshot eyes probably matching mine.

Oh how I wanted to hug him and ask him what's wrong! But he would probably push me away and I didn't want to start crying again. My heart ached, knowing that Luke probably hated me now. I loved him so much and know, it's over. But I would've had to tell him some time. Better now than latter.

"Lily." Luke choked out, tears were still flowing from his eyes, but they were squeezed shut, as if he was in pain. I desperately wanted to comfort him and I felt fresh tears come out, knowing he would reject me.

"Luke, I'm so sorry, please don't be mad at m-"

"Mad at you?" Luke said. I stole a quick glance at him, confusedly.

"I could never be mad at you Lily." I opened and closed my mouth, but nothing came out. Wait, what?

"I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at Kyle." Luke emphasized his brother's name with loathing. I continued my mute phase, still shocked

"See that?" Luke pointed to a medium-sized dent in the wall, most likely, his work. "I was imagining that was his face." Luke turned to me, his eyes penetrating mine, tears still falling.

"I was also mad because, I couldn't escape from my mom to find you, I wish it was me who helped you escape. And . . ." Luke paused and blushed deeply, which I hadn't seen him do since I kissed him on the cheek after the dance, "I wish it was me that was you're first." I turned away, my cheeks were on fire, now it felt like someone was literally squeezing my heart.

"I thought you would hate me, I'm a whore."

"Don't say that, Kyle forced you." Luke scooted closer to me and put his arms around me.

"I'm just so ashamed of it all, even if Kyle had forced me to do it, it's that fact that I did it at the age of 14 that really bothers me as well." I said, quietly, slightly relaxing in Luke's warm embrace.

"I have to admit, dating a girl that's sexually more experienced than me is pretty embarrassing. Especially because I'm still a virgin." My eyes widened.

"Seriously? I thought you'd hooked up with Sophie by now."

"I would never be unfaithful to you Lily, you deserve so much." Luke's words touched my heart, and I felt like I was going to melt from blushing. Luke was so sweet to me, I just wish I deserved him. Luke playfully poked my cheeks, making me even more embarrassed that he noticed.

"Lily?" Luke asked as I settled my head on his chest.

"Yeah?"

"Can I kiss you?" I turned to face Luke I studied his kind eyes and found truth in his words. We were sitting down, which made everything a bit uncomfortable, but I didn't care. I slowly leaned in, my nose slightly brushing his. I felt chills run down my spine when Luke's breathing quickened, his breaths warming my face and making my heart pound.

This is it, I though. Our first kiss. We had never actually kissed on the lips before. I have kissed many men before, due to my previous job, but Luke was much different. I caressed his cheek with both my hands and pressed my lips softly on his.

It was like a cage of butterflies were being released from my stomach when our lips met and there was nothing more that I wanted to do than pull him closer to me. But Luke pulled away, grinning widely at me.

"I take that as a yes?" He teased. I blushed, and rolled my eyes.

"Shut up, virgin." I joked.

"Ouch." He put his hand on his heart and looked offendedly at me.

"Just kiss me." I said, and wrapped my arms around his neck, laughing.

"Gladly." Luke said before our lips met again.

Notes