Niall P.O.V

I’m surprised Harry and I are trying again. It feels weird after all the things that came between us to begin with. Maybe now the timing will be right and we’ll actually work out. I walk through the front door of Elliot’s house beaming, thinking about the possibilities. Earlier I doubted Harry completely, but he seemed so determined to prove himself to me, how could I not give us another chance?

“Well you look happy,” Elliot says from the top of the staircase.

“Well I guess you could say that,” I reply, smiling up at him. His face was a mask that I couldn’t read.

“So what happened then?” Can I detect a hint of anger in his tone?

“Elliot, what’s wrong?” I ask him, walking up the staircase closer to him. He stands unmoving as I approach.

“You didn't answer my question,” he says, ignoring me. “Tell me what happened tonight Niall. Did you and Harry finally make up? Is that why you’re smiling? I hope you know what a bad idea that is.”

“Why do you say that like it’s a bad thing?” Getting angry myself at his questions.

“Because it is a bad thing, Niall. Don’t you understand that? That guy has been horrible to you, they all have-,” he starts.

“I haven’t seen them in over four years, don’t bring them into this,” I say angrily, interrupting him.

He ignores me. “I've been here. All this time I’ve been by your side, helping you. And not once have you showed me that you care. Harry hurt you. For god’s sake Niall, the guys married now. Do you really want to be a home wrecker? You’re stupid if you get back together with him.”

How dare he! “Is that what this is about? You don’t want him to have me because you want me, is that it? Well I’m sorry to break it to you Elliot but that is never going to happen! If I had any interest in you other than friends then I would have done something about it by now, don’t you get that?” I yell at him.

His face falls at my words; some of the hardness leaves it as he looks down.

“He’s going to hurt you Niall. We both know that. You’re setting yourself up to fail again and I want to protect you from that. You need to stop doing this to yourself,” he tries again.

“Then that’s my choice. I’m an adult, Elliot. I don’t need you or anybody else protecting me. I’m not a child,” I say.

“If you don’t want to be treated like a child, then stop acting like one!” he yells at me. The old Niall would have flinched at his words, but not this one, I stand up on my tip toes and get right in his face.

I say the words that I know will hurt him the most, “I’m not yours, and I never will be. So stop!” Before backing away.

“Just trust me, Niall. He’s going to hurt you again and when he does I just might not be here to pick you up,” he says, before walking down the hall to his room.

I stand there for a while before walking back down the stairs to the lounge room.

I lay on the couch for a while watching TV. I thought Harry would have called by now, but maybe he’s just as surprised with my actions as I am. A sudden knock on the door brings me out of my daydream; I get up to answer it. I open it slowly, expecting it to be some salesman or a photographer; I was not expecting to see Blair standing in front of me completely dolled up.

It takes me a second to find my voice. “What are you doing here?” I ask, perhaps a little ruder than I should have.

She glances at me before her small frame pushes past me into the house. I’m hardly fazed as I close the door and turn to look at her.

“Where is he?” she asks, looking around the room.

“Where is who?” I ask, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Harry. Where is Harry?” she says slowly, as if she was talking to a mentally slow person.

“Why do you assume he is here?”

“Well he’s not at home, so where else would be go except back to his little boyfriend?” she says, sneering at me.

“Oh so you heard then?” I say, the side of my mouth rising into a smirk.
“Heard what? I haven’t seen Harry since he left earlier today. I can only assume that he came here,” she responds.

I keep my smirk and cross my arms over my chest. “Well I’m not even sure why you’d be looking for him at all. You don’t have some sort of claim on him anymore.”

She whips her head around, and focuses on me, “And what the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“I hear you guys are separated,” I reply, glad to see her ruffled.

“Well it’s the first I’m hearing about it,” she replies.

“What?” I say, my confidence faltering slightly.

She walks over to me, gesturing at my stance. “Look, this whole tough guy thing isn’t really working. If Harry told you that I and he are separated now, then I’m sorry to break it to you honey, but he lied. If he’s promised you that he’s through with me and ready to sail off into the sunset with you, then I’m sorry but that won’t be happening. Not while I’m in the picture anyway.”

I couldn’t believe it, how could Harry lie to me? How could I blindly believe him again? When am I going to grow up and stop being so naïve? My eyes scan her face to see if she’s lying. But either she’s a perfectionist at keeping her face neutral, she is an actor after all, or Harry really did lie to me and he’s still with Blair.

She steps forward and places her hand under my chin, her eyes patronize me. “Aw, you look like a lost little puppy. You’re so cute, if only you weren’t so broken and after my husband, I’d probably be chasing you around,” she says, laughing at me.

I rip my face away from her hand, “Don’t touch me! You don’t know anything.” I spit at her.

She looks unfazed by my anger. “Well I guess I should be off then,” walks around me and opens the front door, before turning her head around to face me. “Oh and if you see Harold, do tell him to come home.” She winks and closes the door behind her.

I drop to my knees, once again feeling the utter betrayal of the people I care about. I can feel the prick of tears behind my eyes, but I refuse to cry, not over that dick. Instead I connect my fist with the wooden floor, feeling the pain of my knuckles that never properly healed after the incident with Liam’s cheek. I scream out in pain as my red knuckles throb.

“I told you so,” I whip my head up to see Elliot leaning against the door frame. Since when has he been standing there? Was he eavesdropping on the whole conversation?

“Fuck off Elliot,” I say, before standing up and heading out the front door.

I wander the street a bit, not sure of where I’m going but needing to get away from that house. Too many bad thoughts flow through my head in there. The sky begins to get darker, with rain or just night I can’t really tell. I just keep walking. The street look unfamiliar to me makes sense I haven’t been here long. Nothing looks familiar. Except for a black car that I think has been following me for a few minutes, it looks vaguely familiar. I stop to test my theory, and the car slows, I quicken my pace, and the car speeds up. I suddenly spin on my heel and start walking towards the car, with nowhere for it to turn it stops. I walk up to the window and tap on it; it winds down slowly to reveal Harry behind the wheel.

“I should have known,” I say before continuing my walk again.

Harry drives so he’s right next to me.

“Niall, you have to hear me out,” he yells, so I can hear him. Honestly I would prefer not to.

I ignore him and quicken my pace.

“Niall, there’s more to the story you have to listen to me,” he tries again.

I stop in my tracks, cause him to curse and slam the breaks on. “I should hear you out? What more can you say to me, Harry? You think I should get in your car so you can lie to me some more? How did you even find me anyway?” I stay through the open window.

“Blair told me what happened, wanted an explanation. So I called Elliot and he told me you’d left, I figured you’d be around here somewhere,” he says, shrugging his shoulders innocently. Why did he have to be so good looking? “Please, just hop in so we can talk about this.” He pleads.

Against my better judgment I cave. I open the door and sit in the passenger seat, cursing myself for being so stupid, again.

“You know it’s dangerous for a pretty boy like you to be walking the streets alone at night,” Harry says, laughter in his tone.

I ignore him, opting to stare out the window just as I’d done early when I was mad at him. The radio was playing that stupid amnesia song. All I wanted to do was yell at the band and tell them to sing about something other than love. There are worst things in this world than not being able to be with the person you want.

Out of the corner of my eye I see his shoulders slump in defeat. He sighs, “Okay, all joking aside, I guess we need to talk”

I whip my head to the left and glare at him. “You know what Harry, we really don’t. This time I’m over talking to you. I’m over having you in my life, causing me to become so confused that I can’t think straight. I’m over always having the thought you in the back of my mind, stopping me from moving on. I don’t want your apology, or your concern, or your pity. I don’t want to look at you and feel the overwhelming desire to kiss you. I don’t want you because you’re a constant reminder of what I will never be able to have. So please, just drive me to Elliot’s, so I can pack my bags and go back to London.”

He looks at a loss for words, but for once there was not a single part of me that wished to make him feel better. Staring for a while in silence at the innocent expression he has on his face finally pushes me over the edge. Something inside of me snaps.

Harry P.O.V.

I sit there, gripping the wheel tightly as his words flow to me. What can I say to him? Not a single word I say will be enough to make up for the lying and the cheating. So just I sit there, waiting for him to continue his verbal assault.

"And you know what, just for a moment I actually believed all that you had said to me. That you wanted to try again, that you'd left Blair. That you-," pauses to take a deep breath, "loved me. I can't believe how stupid I must be to put myself through this again. You broke me once Harry Styles and I'm not about to sit here and allow you to do it again. I'm done with you and the drama that seems to follow, I'm done with the pitiful emotions that you make me feel. Take me home now." Niall screams at me, his hands gesturing in all directions as his temper rises.

"Niall, I really.." I finally try.

"Don't you dare say you're sorry. Those words would only make me detest you even more," He spits his cold words at me. His tone has changed dramatically in a number of seconds.

"No you know what Niall, fuck this,” I yell, slamming my clenched fists onto the steering wheel, finally having enough of him. “I refuse to apologise to you because I've done absolutely nothing wrong. You've made your own fair share of mistakes."

Niall shoves his scarred wrists forcefully into my face. "Yeah, and I think I've paid for them."

I was disgusted by his action. Wasn’t I the one who saved him from bleeding out in his room? I saved his life and he has the nerve to blame me for his actions. "Don't you dare try to make me feel guilty for something that you did. I tried to be there for you but you wouldn't let me. I tried to be your friend, your boyfriend, your unemotional sex toy. Dammit Niall, all those years ago I tried to save you from yourself. And even though I could never do that, at least I saved your life." I was furious.

"And for the last four years, I've been wishing that you hadn't." He spits.

"Well then maybe you'll get lucky. Maybe next time I won't be there and you can walk in front of a bus or jump off a roof. Then maybe you'll stop blaming me for saving you." I continue to yell back at him, my eyes constantly leaving the road.

"It's not my fault you fell off the grid, you left everyone behind, your friends, your family. We all wished you were still alive and not lying in an alleyway next to a dirty club after some overdose. We all tried to love you the best we knew how, but you couldn't see it, you wouldn't let us. Don't you understand, Niall? We couldn't find you. You need to stop blaming everyone else for the choices you've made and the way your life has turned out. You're so bitter that I can't even recognise my best friend anymore."

Niall sits glaring straight ahead fuming at my words.

"You know what. Sure I've made mistakes, I should have told you the truth about Blair, but despite everything I wanted to be with you again. I won't apologise for marrying her because for a while she was the best thing in my life, I will however apologise for the way that you found out I hadn't really left her, even I will admit that you don't deserve that." I say, trying my best to soften my voice.

"Fuck you Harry Styles." Niall replies, his voice like ice as it hits my heart.

It all happens slowly; my car sails half way through the intersection when I hear a horn being sounded from somewhere over to my right. The sound of tires screeching to a halt against the road was next, making my ears pop. My instincts kick in as I yank the steering wheel to the left, trying my best to get us away from whatever was happening around us. I hear the horrible sound of metal crumpling under force, but somehow I know that it wasn’t my car, it was to my left somewhere, my eyes won’t focus enough for me to see anything. A blinding light streams through the windows and for a second all I see is white. I have a feeling that maybe I’m dead. That’s weird, I thought death was supposed to be peaceful, my eyes hurt as if they are being stretched open and a torch is being shined straight into them. If this is death, I want my refund. I can feel my hands gripping onto something, it’s solid and circular, but I can’t move it, it’s locked to the left for some reason. The bright light uncovers my eyes just in time for me to see Niall, his face ashen as he stares wide eyed at me. His mouth opens and closes, but I don’t hear a word. His eyes are frantic now, looking over my face as if to memorise it for the last time. He grabs my wrist just as the sound pierces my ears again.
“HARRY!” he screams before the sound of metal crushing metal fills my ears and drowns him out. His hand is ripped away from me, leaving behind a burning imprint of his fingers on my wrist. I feel myself falling backwards against the door as the car tips onto its side. Glass shatters around me, cutting me any place it lands as my hands desperately search for Niall’s. The car skids for a while before coming to its final resting place and silence.

My arms and legs throb from the cuts as I lay half crumpled against the door with my eyes squeezed tightly shut. I struggle to breathe as my ribs rattle in my chest with every breath. My head aches from scrapping along the rough road as I realise my top half is hanging half out of the window onto the tar. I slowly open one eye, squinting against the flashing lights that surround me. Small droplets fall on my head, causing blood to run into my eyes. Of course it’s raining. There are people everywhere, a large group are crowded some meters away from the front of my car, and others I can hear are surrounding me. They’re frantic; as they dial numbers on their phones, yelling at each other, I think someone’s trying to talk to me. I can hear them whispering among themselves.

“Don’t you guys recognize that car?”

“That can’t be who we think it is can it?”

“Lady, it doesn’t matter who it is, they need our immediate help!”


“No, please don’t let it be him!”

“Fine, fine. Who is it then?”

A solemn silence followed.

“That’s Harry Styles, I’m sure of it.”

“This means, the boy over there must be Niall Horan.” Shocked gasps followed.

What Niall? I open my other eye and scan the inside of my car the best I can from this position. Niall’s not there. Where could he have gone? My eyes become frantic as they search every place I can see. They finally rest to my left on the windscreen, which would be fine except for the gaping hole in the right side of it about as big as a person. If Niall’s not in the car, then the force of the impact must have flung him through the glass. Bile rises in my throat just thinking about it. I move my right arm, pushing myself up and out the window, a piece of fabric slaps me in the face, I realise it’s what’s left of my seatbelt swinging itself free from my body. I can see people scrambling around me, putting their hands on me to hold me still. They yell at me, telling me it’s not safe to move, I was in a major car crash. As if I’m unaware of that. My thoughts are solely focused on getting to Niall and making sure he’s okay.

I make it through the window, adding more cuts and bruises to my already torn up body. Their screaming continues as I push myself onto my hands and knees. A strong dizziness comes over me as I fight the urge to throw up.

I must get to him!


I must get to him!

I repeat over and over in my head. He’s not too far away, I can make it. I slowly rise to my feet ignoring the screams of people trying to get me to be still. I take a slow step, and another step. My chest screams in agony as I struggle to breath. My head throbs louder and louder until I can hear something rattling. Well that doesn’t sound good. I continue determined to get to him. Black spots suddenly obscure my vision and this time I can’t counteract the dizziness as I drop to my knees and pass out only meters from where Niall lays.

Notes

tell me to update right after I put a chapter up and I'll take my time with the next one just to spite you (:

And apparently I love to put my characters through hell before the good stuff..

enjoy