Falling out of love is hard
Falling for betrayal is worst
Broken trust and broken hearts
I know, I know
Thinking all you need is there
Building faith on love and words
Empty promises will wear
I know, I know
And now when all is done
There is nothing to say
And if you're done with embarrassing me
On your own you can go ahead tell them
Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the skyline
All we had is gone now
Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible

Impossible- Shontelle

[Jamie’s P.O.V.]

I try my hardest to ignore my confusion, anger, disappointment, embarrassment and sadness, to try and enjoy the concert. I'm not gonna lie, they sing beautifully together.
Harry had already spotted me, and, he tried to be slick and looked at me every once in a while.




He obviously isn't the sneakiest in the group. I chuckled every time though. Louis even spotted me when he caught Harry looking. He mumbled an 'I'm sorry' and I just threw my beanie at him for reassurance. He proudly wore it and I could feel death glares being shot at me from every corner of the room.

Oh how the daggers scare me.

They were currently stalling, or so I think, and were just talking and reading tweets.

This one was asking about Eleanor.

"We're doing great actually! Thanks for asking." Louis smiled proudly.

"Love birds, the both of ya." Liam teased.

"Speaking of birds; Harry has a special friend out there in the crowd. We hope you're enjoying the concert Mimi!" Zayn grinned.

I looked at Harry and noticed he was trying his hardest to hide his smile by looking off to the sides.

"We can't wait to meet you!" Niall said excitedly.



Oh Niall...


"Mimi! They did a shout out for you! And Louis is STILL wearing your beanie!" Julie shrieked in my ear. I smiled the best possible smile I could and focused back on the boys as they began to get ready to sing, umm...

"What song is this?"

"Kiss You." Julie winked.

Hahaha. She's so funny.

I watched as they all chuckled and did funny little moves as the song started. Zayn stepped up and began to sing his part. I cheered him on a bit and smiled as Harry came up from behind and jumped in front of him to do his part, making sure he waved or smiled to a fan every once in a while.

I noticed Liam and Niall whispering to each other in the left side as they watched Harry

"Oh tell me, tell me, tell me how to turn your love on! You can get, get anything that you want! Mimi just shout it out! Shout it out!" Harry whipped his head around to Liam and Niall who had their mic's towards their lips.


On another note; What did the lyrics just say?!


"Mimi just shout it out! Yeah!" Oh okay... Yeah.

Julie, once again, freaked and shouted, confirming that I indeed heard Niall and Liam replacing the word with Mimi.


Oh dear god.

My eyes followed Harry. He was laughing to himself as he walked off rubbing his chin besides a grinning Louis.

I couldn't help but smile. He's such a dork. My eyes shot up and I continue to watch the guys sing. And then, it was Niall's turn. Lucky me; he was walking up right in front of where Julie and I were.



"Shit. God please help me..." And just like that, my prayers were answered when Louis knelt down and gave me back my beanie.
"Thank you!" I shouted as he walked away with a wink.

Why don’t I want him to see me?

I don’t know…. I just don’t!


[Niall's P.O.V]
I watched as Louis walked over and handed a girl back her beanie. I smiled and went over to sing to that area. The same girl that Louis gave the beanie back to was hiding her face. Was she crying? She must really love Louis...

I shrugged and went off to Harry.

"Where is she?!" I say into his ear.

We only had this song, and two more before we had to stop, and Harry still won't budge.

"Like I said all the other MILLIONS of times; After the show." He winked and pranced off towards Louis to sing with him.
I just chuckled and waited for the chorus.


~


"Amazing!"


"Great job lads!"

"Another killer, show!"

We were greeted and praised as we walked in one by one.

"Okay boys, it's not over yet! We still need you to use a bit more of your energy-"

"I think THAT won't be a problem." Louis chuckled.

"We still have tons!" I added as we walked down to the room where we would meet with fans. They all came in, and they all went out... Eventually. It all seemed to have gone by too fast.

"We saved the best for last!" Harry yelled in a happy tone as he wiggled in his seat.

"We finally get to meet Mimi?" Liam asked with a grin. Harry simply nodded, and we all turned as the door creaked open.












"Oh... My... God."





























The blonde shrieked and jumped up and down, her hands flailing and hair all over the place.

She sounded strangely familiar...



"CAN YOU SIGN MY CD?!"

I was– WE- were all confused.

We all turned to Harry and saw he seemed confused as well.

"Where's Mimi?" Harry asked with a chuckle as he waved her over.

She scurried in a cute shuffle to Harry and handed her the CD she had in her hand, and he signed it at she began to talk.

"Well, first of all; you all were amazing! Loved to vocals," Harry handed her the CD, and she went down and handed it to Liam, who, began to sign it.
"And your fun little stunts." Liam handed her the CD as she moved on to Zayn to sign it.
"As for Mimi; she's just in the bathroom." She shrugged as Zayn handed her the CD. She went towards Louis and handed it to him.
"She was a bit nervous, or, mad... I don't know what it was..." She murmured as Louis gave her back the CD. As she walked over to me, a huge grin appeared on her face.
"Best for last!" She chuckled and handed me the CD. I just smiled at her and signed it before giving it back to her.


"Well, take a seat so we can chat. We have time anyways." Harry smiled and she nodded.


She sat in a chair across from us and fidgeted with her phone.

"So, umm," she looked up at Harry.
"You and Mimi, huh?" She smirked.


"Oh my god..." Harry chuckled and leaned back as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"She's so dumb! Honestly! Like, I've talked to her about you guys and she's totally out of it most of the time."

"I noticed that! Even after she saw paparazzi and everything, she waved it off as nothing!" Harry laughed.

The blonde rolled her eyes playfully.

"I swear, she's probably high like ninety nine precent of the time..." she chuckled and looked down at he beeping phone.
"She said she got lost... I'll be right back..." She smiled awkwardly and shuffled out.


"Well, THAT wasn't what I expected." Zayn laughed and leaned forward.

"When I saw her screaming, I was like; 'Harry, I think she knew us.'" Liam laughed.

"That's just her friend! Umm... Jaaaa... Juuuu... Julie! There we go." Harry grinned.


Julie? Hmm...


They continued to talk a bit, and that's when I noticed that Louis was quiet.

Something was wrong with him by the way he was starring off at the wall as he ran his hands through his hair.

"Mate, are you okay?" I whispered to him. He slowly moved his eyes up to me.

"She must be feeling horrible..." He mumbled.

I shot him a confused look, and in return, he clenched his jaw.

"I should've told her when I had the chance! I'm covering for YOU Niall! I'm just as involved in the situation as YOU are!" I was thrown back when he raised his voice and stood up, shoving his finger against my chest every time he made emphasis.

"Whoa whoa whoa! What's the matter?" Liam held Louis back, and Harry came around and placed his hand on my shoulder.

"What's the matter Lou? What are you talking about?" I asked him softly.

"Harry and you are about to get the BIGGEST shock. Better yet, SHE already got the biggest shock." He spat.

"Lou, calm down and explain why you're so mad!" Harry raised his voice a bit.

Louis chuckled and paced around a bit. Zayn moved me over to sit by me and we watch


Louis continue to chuckle.


It was like watching a psycho killer going mad.


"Guys! We have something we need to talk abooouuutttt!" Luke yelled as he walked in with Calum, Ashton, and Michael.

Harry and Liam went to talk with them, laughing every once in a while.

Louis then stopped and walked over to Zayn and I.


"I love dramatic scenes, but, you know what? Lets just skip to the part where I spoil it; Mimi is JAMIE, Niall. She was HERE at the CONCERT! And she's about to walk in through those doors with the biggest FAKE smile she can possibly conjure-"
















"FOUND HER!"















































Julie came in, arm linked with a petite girl wearing a Pom beanie, the pom beanie that Lou wore, a red skirt, tights, and a white crop top with her cute boots to pull the look together. Her phone hung loosely in her hand, and her purple hair was down in waves.






A weak half smile was on her face as she shook her head in disappointment.





Her eyes were set on me.


"Guys, this is Mimi." Harry walked quickly over to Jamie and placed an arm around her shoulder.
"Mimi, these are the lads." Harry cleared his throat awkwardly.


Jamie sighed, letting a smile cross her face.

The biggest FAKE smile I've ever seen.

"Nice to finally see who you all really are."

"So this is the infamous Mimi?" Calum smiled and went to talk to her, along with the other guys.

As they chatted her up and introduced themselves, Harry walked over to us.

"Well, you guys don't seem that excited anymore. What's the deal?" Harry chuckled.
The other guys looked at me.


"Umm... Yeah... Let's go say... Hi." I got up, feeling my legs go a bit weak with every step I took towards her.

"Mimi," Jamie turned away from her conversation with the other guys, leaving Julie to make conversation, and looked at Harry.

"This is Liam," He nodded.
She waved.


"Zayn," he smiled.
She smiled back.


"Niall," I looked off to the side.

"And Louis. They've been dying to meet you." Harry smiled.


"Really now?"




[Jamie's P.O.V.]
Niall didn't even want to look at me. He just tuned to the side and looked off somewhere else.

"I know I've been dying to see them... Again..." I mumbled under my breath.

"Well, do you think these girls would be up for an after party?!" Michael yelled.

While they were all talking, I quickly scurried over to Niall, and dragged him away to a closet I saw outside. I pulled him in and searched for a light.

Niall found it though.

"What are you doing?!" Niall asked a bit shocked.

I tried to remember what Mark said, and took a deep breath before facing his blue eyes.
My mouth was dry, my hands quivered, my lips trembled... And my heart was beating my insides up.


"I just wanted to ask you; Why?" My voice was a bit shaky.

Niall didn't say anything. His mouth just hung open a bit, eyes searching the room, and an occasional 'I' coming out of his mouth.


That was enough of an answer for me.


I opened the door, and stomped out of there and into the room to get Julie.

"We're going." I muttered as I pulled her hand.

"Wh-Why?! I was just-" She looked at me, and her face went pale.
"What's the matter?" She pulled me off to the side, leaving the guys alone to talk with some of the crew that were there.


"I-I... There's a lot I need to tell you..." I managed to get out through my, now, small weeps.

"JAMIE! JAMIE!" Niall came in to the room, scanning it till he saw me. He walked desperately towards me.
"Jamie! Please, let me talk-"


"Stop! Leave me alone Niall!" I backed away from him.

"Jamie?" That was Harry's voice.

I didn't even bother turning to look at him. I kept my eyes on the panting Niall the whole time.

"Shit..." I heard Zayn curse under his breath.

"Could you just PLEASE listen?"

"Why couldn't you talk back there then? Huh?! Is this some kind of joke? Am I some kind of JOKE?! Because I SURE feel like ONE." I felt my voice rising with every word I said.

"Will someone explain what's going on?" Calum asked as he watched a bodyguard hold Niall back, and Paul holding me back.

"Jamie, calm down." Liam came walking towards me. I looked over at the confused Julie, who was fiddling with her hair out of nervousness.

"Julie," she snapped her head towards me.
"You drove here right?" She nodded once.
"Let's go... Please." I mumbled as I went around Paul, and dragged her out.


"MIMI!" I heard Harry yelling out for me.

Dammit... He at least deserves an explanation...

"Mimi, what's wrong?" I felt him pull me in by the waist and embrace me in a hug. I hugged him back, tighter, and cried a bit more.

"I'm sorry Harry... I'm so sorry-"

"Hey, hey. Just tell me what's wrong..." He pulled away and looked at me.


"JAMIE!" It was Louis.







Wait... Louis...







"But... Sorry love, I just thought you were a crazed fa-"
"He's over protective of me." Niall said as he quickly cover Louis mouth. Louis was saying something under his hand as he gave Niall a confused look, but, I didn't quite catch it.
~
"How do you know Niall?" He asked. Lou looked a bit hesitant to answer, and that's when Niall came in.
"He's a family friend." Niall quickly looked at me and grinned.
~
"So, why are you here in Lodon?! That's crazy that you're here!" I gushed as I waited for an answer.
He was quiet though.
"Visiting some cousins. That's all." He sounded a bit off.
~
"Soooo; Why are you here? I mean... I'm GLAD you're here! But... Why? I thought we were gonna hang out on Friday or something?" I smiled at him.
His bright smile quickly faded into a serious look.
Something tells me he's not here to joke around with me...
"I don't have much time now actually..."
I furrowed my brows.
"What? Why?"
He took in a deep breath and began to fidget with his sleeves.
"I actually came here to tell you something... Something I should have told you a log time ago. After finding out how two of my best mates are both connected to the same girl, I couldn't help but try and do something. I don't want to see this all go badly."




HE was TRYING to tell me... And I was too DUMB to see the signs!

Always letting Niall finish his sentences, the hesitation, the paparazzi, Eleanor, he KNEW Harry, and for fucks sake... He even said PAUL's name!

"Lou..." I removed myself from Harry, and ran towards him, giving him a hug.
"I'm so stupid! I should've known!" I said in frustration.


"Look," he stepped back and looked at me.
"Niall asked me to keep it a secret. I would've told you myself, but, I didn't want to go behind his back and do it-"


"Can you guys please explain what's going on?" Harry asked, his voice getting a bit deeper, and eyes a bit darker.

"And I'm twice as confused, Jamie." Julie spoke up.

"Wait," Harry looked at me with a shocked look.

It was as if everything finally made sense to him.

"JAMIE?! YOU?! HER?!!”

"I should've introduced myself as Jamie... Not MIMI. I'm really sorry Harry, I tried telling you once, but, I'm... I don't know." I looked up at his surprised face.

"W-wait... So, you mean to tell me that SHE's the Jamie NIALL was talking about?" Harry turned to Louis, and he nodded.

"I'm sorry... I'm... I gotta go." I pulled Julie, and we ran out of there as fast as possible.




"WAIT! MIMI!"



Now I understand why Louis wanted to tell me... Now I know what this whole thing was gonna come out to... This could cause a dent in Niall and Harry's friendships..





And it's all my fault.




~



From: Niall
Please, Jamie, just answer my calls!

To: Niall
Please stop Niall.

From: Niall
NO!!!! Not until you let me talk to you in person! You don't understand!

To: Niall
Don't understand what? That I'm not good enough to hang around your famous friends? Don't tell me you thought I would use you for your fame. Do you really think I'd stoop that low...?

From: Niall
You don't get it! Just let me explain. Please? Please Jamie...

My thumb hovered over my screen, wondering what I should say. I just don't know why he would keep that a secret. I would've found out eventually...
Then again... I should've known.


To: Niall
I'll talk to you some other time.
Just let me take this all in for now.
Great show by the way...




I hit send and turned my phone off once it said it was received. I hid it in my sports bra and looked at my reflection in the mirror. My purple hair was turning a lilac color...


"Jamie, you can't just stay in there forever!" I heard Julie say through the door.


"I'm just putting the PJ's on!" I half shouted. I gathered my stuff up and took a deep breath before getting out.
"There!" I fake smiled as I opened the door and walked passed her.


"Jamie, don't be so upset-"


"I feel like an IDIOT, Julie. A FUCKING IDIOT." I said loudly as I threw my clothes into my bag.

Julie sighed and plopped on her king sized bed. She patted a spot besides her, and I went over to sit by her.

"Spill." She mumbled.

I took in a deep breath, trying to maintain my anger.

"Niall was the blondie. I just assumed he went to our school," I started, and I felt like I would never stop talking.

From me hanging out with Niall, to meeting Eleanor Calder, to me being on magazines with Harry, it all just felt unreal to me now. I didn't feel sad anymore... Hell, I don't even know why I was crying. Maybe out of pure anger, but, I should be the one taking all the blame.

"And you know what? Maybe none of this would happen if I would've told you it was Niall Horan. Maybe if I didn't seclude myself from the mainstream world, the pop culture, MTV and VH1, from teen magazines or Cosmo, I would KNOW who made up One Direction. I would've KNOWN what I had gotten myself into. But, Julie... That's not me. I live in my own world filled with art that I love, with music that touches me, I don't go to gossip sites and find the latest on Jessica Alba. I don't go to Facebook to read about who is going to the next Justin Bieber concert. I don't spend every waling moment following famous people's every move. I feel like a fucking idiot." I finally felt like I was done and turned to see Julie with her mouth hanging open.

"This is some Jerry Springer shit." She mumbled with all seriousness.

"Julie!" I chuckled as I took another enchilada from the tray her mom had brought for us during my whole emotional speech.

"Well... Okay... What's making you so upset?" She asked as she shifted positions.

I chewed on the soft tortilla, felt the cheese and sauce collide in my mouth, and burned my tongue with how hot they still were before coming up with an answer.

I looked at Julie, dead in the eyes.

"I'm not good enough." I muttered.
"I'm obviously not good enough if Niall doesn't want me to know about his fame. I'm not good enough if he can't even explain to me why he did it when I gave him the chance. I'm OBVIOUSLY not good enough if he can't introduce me to ALL his friends. And," I took in a deep breath, feeling pools of water form in my closed eyelids.
"I'm obviously not good enough if he can't even look at me. I've known him for under a month, I know, but... I thought we started to build a great bond." I opened my eyes up to see Julie mirroring me; tears trickling down her cheeks.


"Ohh, Jamie!" She pulled me into a hug, a hug that made me feel so much better for that small moment, for that one second, one that made me feel wanted.... Good enough.
"You're amazing. And if some snobby popstar can't realize that, then, he can go fuck himself." She pushed away, still holding my shoulders as she smiled at me.
"You are the definition of beautiful; Sweet, funny, caring, talented, and loving. I know you have your reasons to be mad right now, but, maybe there's a reason for him acting that way. You still need to talk things through and get the whole story before making judgements-"


"I'm here bitches! And I brought ice cream to eat while we cry over our miserable love lives!" Ryan came bursting in the door with Julie's mom laughing behind him.

"You kids behave. And Ryan," he turned to face her.
"You better be telling the truth about being gay."


"Oh I would never lie. If I wanted to see boobs and vagina, I would just have to wink at a girl. They become a waterfall-"

"Okay! I'll be downstairs if you guys need anything." Julie's mom closed the door and left.

"I still don't get why she thinks I'm straight." Ryan laughed as he jumped on the bed.

"You interrupted Jamie and I's moment! And the answer to your question; Your voice doesn't sound gay at all, and, remember when you kissed me during truth or dare-"

"First off; suck it up bitch. And second; my voice IS pretty sexy. Oh, and, WE NEVER SPEAK OF THE KISS." He clapped his hands to emphasize his hatred of that subject.

I wouldn't blame him though... That was the most awkward kiss like... EVER.

I couldn't help but let out a laugh as I watched the two divas argue.


"See? Already laughing with me here!" Ryan smirked cockily.

"I love you guys." I chuckle as I grabbed a small tub of ice cream.

~


"Niall is like the sensitive one."


"Okay, so, why do you think he hid it from me?" I asked Ryan as we "watched" Easy A whilst eating chips with Salsa Valentina. We were on beanie bags, just relaxing. Ryan sat in between of Julie and I, and, we just made convo about the whole night.

I reached for the bottle of hot sauce and added a bit more to the bowl we had for ourselves.

"Honey, calm down on the fucking salsa. I ain't Mexican like your beaner ass." Ryan chuckled as he grabbed another chip from the bowl.

Salsa Valentina is life.

"I wish I could eat spicy food like you. I get the runs-"

"Julie, shut up. Nobody gives a fuck about your literal SHIT." Ryan laughed as he punched her lightly.
"But, back to your question..." Ryan shifted to face me directly. He thought for a second before opening his mouth to answer.
"I'd say for protection maybe? Those fans can get crazy... I mean, like, twitter for example; Hashtag Jamie can kiss my ass or Hashtag Bitch, Niall's mine, is not exactly the definition of approval from his fans." Ryan chuckled.


"But, it's not like we were going out. I just wanted to be his friend. Harry didn't mind! He was just afraid of me being afraid of paparazzi and attention or whatever." I stated as I munched on another chip.

"Well, think of it this way," he shifted to a comfortable position and waved Julie to scoot closer.

"Remember David?"

"You mean Cat's David?" Julie asked once she was close enough.

"Yeah, that bitch. You know how David was popular and every girl wanted him and there was a fight over him our freshman year, so, he kept Cat and him a secret?"

Julie and I nodded.

"That's your ass right there." He pointed at me.
"They started off as friends and he eventually wanted to be with her on another level.”


"They've been out about it for months now though! Besides, Cat is hot as hell and it would be David's loss, not hers." Julie mumbled as she stuffed chips in her mouth.

"Pinche gorda..." [Fat ass…] I chuckled as I watched her eat.

"You're the fat one!" She laughed and flicked me off.

"But anyways," Ryan shoved her face and smiled at me.
"That's just a theory. There's also the whole Modest! thing or the whole traveling thing. Maybe he wanted you to get to know him first before you read the tabloids. They tend to give people a different image than they might actually be." He shrugged.


"Ugh... This isn't real. I'm gonna wake up in the morning and this is all just going to be one big dream." And although half of me wish that was true, the other half was already a tad too attached to the guys.

"It's your fault too! I mean, who DOESN'T know One motherfucking Direction?" Ryan chuckled.

"Shut the fuck up..." I grumbled as I lay on my back.

"She already threw a whole tantrum about how stupid she felt." Julie said through her mouthful of chips.

"And I understand too, I admit. But... You can't expect people to know every single mother fucking person that's famous. I'm sorry I don't spend my days looking on websites, stalking celebrities and shit. Hell, I know people who didn't know who the fuck Hannah Montana was, but, did know Miley Cyrus, or, people who don’t know who Florence & The Machine is." I chuckled as I sat back up.


"Who the fuck are they?" Julie asked with a confused face.

Ryan and I stared at each other, and shook our heads in disbelief.


"What?! Are they really that good?"

Notes

Happy Halloween :D I cant give you guys candy.... So.... Why not an update?! It's long-ish just for you guys c: Maybe not so happy, but, the next chapter is pretty cute and silly :3

Enjoy!