Falling for Harry Styles

“Is there anything I can help you with love?” Harry asked from somewhere behind me with a curious inflection in his voice.
“Nope,” I replied with a smile directed at him. I turned back to methodically stirring some herbs into a pan of mushrooms while the potatoes finished crisping in the oven and the steaks cooked in a pan next to me.
“You sure….” He trailed off, now stood right behind me, as the steaks sizzled.
“I’m fine Hazza. But you could set the table for me while I finish up.”
He chuckled and planted a kiss to the back of my head. “Okay I can do that.”
I repositioned the lid on the pan and turned the fire down as I opened the oven and prodded the potatoes. They were crispy and cooked to perfection so I pulled them out to rest on the counter before shucking them into a bowl.
As if on cue, Niall burst through the door connecting the kitchen to the lounge. “I smell food.”
“Yes Niall, I’m cooking,” I replied with sarcasm drenching my tone as I prodded the steaks. Deeming them perfect, I turned off the burner and laid them onto a plate with the rest.
“Is it ready?” his eyes were lit up like a kid on Christmas morning.
I chuckled at his eagerness as I stirred the mushrooms a bit more, “Almost.”
“Can I rally the troops?”
“Um…”
“Great!” He ran from the room before I could stop him and I could hear him gruffly telling everyone to ‘get to the table so we can eat you nutters’.
Harry chuckled, “Food enthusiast that one is.” I rolled my eyes playfully as everyone filed into the room and sat at our massive table.
“There’s no food on this table,” Louis complained and he received a blunt elbow to the ribs from Eleanor.
“Louis, don’t be rude,” she scolded.
“Niall got a bit excited is all.” I replied with a light chuckle as I walked the steaks and potatoes to the table. “Luckily I’m finished with the actual cooking bit.” I turned off the last burner and poured the mushrooms into a bowl before taking my seat next to Harry. Everyone was staring at me or looking around to each other like they didn’t know what to do. “Well… dig in.” It was like the invisible force holding everyone back disappeared and they started chatting idly as they passed around the food. I smiled as everyone served themselves, happy to have this again—even if it wasn’t the same as last time.
“Natalie…?” I turned towards the voice with raised brows. “Thank you for letting Niall invite me,” Ginger smiled sweetly.
“Oh no problem hun. I just hope he took you on a proper date first.” I flashed a look at our pink cheeked Irishman who was currently grumbling an ‘of course I did’ as he stuffed his face.
She giggled, “He did. We had a picnic in the park.” Everyone cooed as Niall’s face reddened more and a smile split his face from ear to ear.
“Oh my gosh. Mmmm. This is so delicious,” Louis dramatized as he ate. We all chuckled at his antics, no doubt meant to pull attention away from Niall.
“I’m amazed at how effortless it was,” Sophia spoke in innocent awe from next to Liam. “You just cooked for ten people and didn’t even break a sweat. It’s almost like you’ve done it before,” she tacked on with an impressed smile.
The room suddenly felt like it was standing still. All eyes were on me with looks of anticipation, like I was about to break down or something. I realized in that moment, as I meet the eyes of my friends, that Brazie’s projection was true. They all linked a big dinner to thought of my sister. I huffed out a sigh, “Guys, I’m fine.” The room was still tense and I could see Ginger and Sophia’s eyes darting around in confusion, clearly lost on the whole thing. “I lost her, but I’m okay. I’m healing.”
I received a few curt nods as the tension seemed to ease a little bit. I still felt the caution from everyone as we made small talk. Every time the topic of conversation turned to that of the last time or to my sister someone changed the subject all together. I saw Liam discreetly explain the situation to Sophia and Ginger and whatever he said to them, made them cautious in what they said as well.
“So, what about those cookies from last time; everyone enjoyed those, right?” I was testing my theory and was proven right as Perrie chirped on about cookies for her wedding. I let out a frustrated breath and felt Harry squeeze at my leg in comfort. I turned to him with pleading eyes, begging for something, anything to alleviate this burning annoyance inside me at the way everyone was acting.
He gave me a sympathetic smile and a small nod as if saying ‘you know what you have to do. He finished his encouragement with a small peck to my cheek and another squeeze to my leg as he left his hand there and turned back to his food.
I stared at his side profile for a moment before I sighed and shut my eyes, “Guys, I’m not broken.” Everyone fell silent again and it stayed that way a moment, my eyes still shut not wanting to see what kind of looks I was getting now. Slowly I opened my eyes and the only looks I got were confusion and curiosity, probably not understanding what I meant. “Really, I’m okay.” I met eyes with each of them willing them to believe me. “I know--” I took a deep breath; mentally preparing to divulge these feelings and actions that only Harry had seen firsthand. “I know… when it first happened I was terrible. I was hurting and I didn’t know how to deal with it. It was like, a vice grip on my heart that was just continually constricting tighter and tighter. I did the only thing that would take the pain away and it was destructive to say the least. I honestly don’t remember much from that first month after I lost her. I was probably a right bitch and I’m sorry for that.” I met eyes with each of them to make it more personal. “But I’m okay now. I don’t feel that intense pain anymore. It’s more of like a dull ache. Therapy has helped to lessen the intensity. Harry has helped to console me along the way,” I smiled as I squeezed his hand in mine. “And you guys have helped, a lot.
“I’ve realized over the past month yeah I lost my only sibling and it sucks, the hole that was left. But… I have you guys. More like family to me than friends. I have you to fill that space that was left when she died. So really… I’m okay.” I smiled around the table and saw smiles of satisfaction directed at me as well as Perrie tearing up a little bit. I let out a breath as they finally understood. I caught the wide adoring smile Harry had directed at me before he chastely kissed my cheek.
“Ew, you two are so mushy,” Louis’ voice was soft and teasing, as he was always the one to lighten the mood. Everyone giggled and he was successful, as always.
“Harry you’re so lucky to get food like this all the time,” Niall admitted as he stuffed more food in his face. He chuckled as his attention stayed on the food in front of him, “Maybe she could come on tour with us as our personal chef.” Everyone chuckled at his offhanded comment as it was played off as a joke.
The thought never really left my mind as the night drew on. Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad idea. I could be with Harry instead of being all alone in our flat with nothing to do. I kept those thoughts to myself as the offhanded comment was long forgotten.

Notes