I wake up to the sound of beep, beep, beep, of a heart monitor. I don't open my eyes at first. I was to hear If I went to heaven or hell, then I can decide if I want to open my eyes and be there. Mostly, it's silent. Apart from the bleep I hear nothing. So I then decide to twitch my finger, see if anybody or anything notices and makes a sound so I know where the hell I am. I twitch it and still hear nothing. So I decide the best thing to do is flutter my eyes open like I'm in a movie, and see where I am and start to peice out where Clare will be, and her baby, if her baby isn't already dead. But that would be good for her as it would be a perfect excuse to zayn about not having the baby. But what if she is alive, and I am dead, or visa versa. Crap I hope we are together. I flutter my eyelids open and see I world of white. Heaven. All good so far. Then I look to my side, towards the beeping noise. And realise the ceiling was whie, I'm in a hospital bed. I look to my other side a d see a crashed out Liam in a chair. There is a clock next to him, 3am. Great, no drama for me. Nobody jumping up and hugging me and getting exited. I reach out to touch him and he disappears. what the hell.

"LIAM, NIALL, LOUIS, ANYBODY" I shout. A lady comes in to the room, a nurse by the looks of it.

"oh, so your awake, my pet didn't kill you" she laughs. What an awful thing to say. "well lets try again shall we" she sniggers. What's going on. I am then hit by a huge black thing in my side and everything goes black again.

"i told you not to sit on the bed, you've ruffled up the overs, look, they are pressing on her side" Liam is that you? It sounds like Liam.

"sorry, I just wanted to get closer to her, I miss her" and that sounded like Niall.

"coffees here" I hear a droned out Louis. The other two thank him and then I hear a loud sip.

"Niall could you drink any louder?" I hear Louis laugh.

"sorry" Niall chuckles. Liam stays silent. I twitch my finger, did I survive two blows or did the other one never happen, I'm confused. I hear a crash as something hits the floor. It sounded like a coffee cup.

"did you guys see that?" I hear an exited Liam.

"see what?" Niall asks confused.

"her finger it twitched" Liam says.

"she's not awake Liam, she would open her eyes if she was" Louis says quietly. *hmmmm* I think to myself. I want to face the boys. I'm going to open my eyes.....now. I flutter them open to see Niall at the other side of the room, not looking at me. Louis staring into his coffee cup, and liamwith his head in his hands, quietly sobbing. I decide to say something whitty, beasue that's so I am. I pluck up the energy and come out with

"not buy me a coffee then?" i know it's bad but Ive just got up, cut me some slack. Liam shoots his head up and gets to his feet.

"oh my god, your awake" he cries. I force out a weak smile. Niall charges over and hugs me.

"mind the wires" shouts Louis. Them he comes over to my bedside, kissing my forehead.

"welcome back beautiful" says Liam smiling. Kissing me on the cheek.

"where's Clare and the baby?" I ask. I suddenly remember I didn't go through all that alone.

"she woke up last week, but the baby didn't, she killed it, well the other car killed it, zayn and Harry have been by her bedside ever since the accident. Harry has been to visit you often but zany can't do this alone, he's a sensitive person." Louis says.

"how long have I been out?" I ask shakily.

"5 weeks. It wasn't looking hopeful. But you pulled through, and I love you" Liam replies.

"where is Clare, I need to see her, and what happend. I think I know but I don.." but before I can finish my sentence a load of nurses barge in the door, and rush the boys out. They start rushing round playing with machines and touching me all over. It's horrible, all I want is Clare.