The Happiest Place On Earth

Kaylani could hear murmured voices as she slowly regained consciousness. She could easily tell they were talking about her. Warm arms were wrapped around her and kept her head elevated which she immediately recognized as Jake holding her. His voice was loud by her head but his arms brought her comfort.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing here?! I told you to stay there so we could talk about this, but you just had to ignore me! Now look at what you’ve done.” Jake murmured the last part a little more softly. He felt an immense amount of guilt because he knew this was partially his fault. If he had only told her sooner they wouldn’t have gotten in this predicament.

“I needed to see her now that they are gone. I couldn’t take it anymore!” The voice was easily recognizable as Ryan’s. She would know that voice anywhere - no matter how long it had been since she had last heard it.

Kaylani’s head was pounding and the yelling wasn’t helping whatsoever. She could feel that her throat was dry but she didn’t care about that right now, she just wanted the pounding in her head to stop or she knew she would burst.

“I don’t care what you wanted! I knew this would happen. She was doing just fine and then you had to come back and fu-”

“Shut up!” Alanis had interrupted Jake’s rant the minute she saw Kaylani’s eyes flutter open. She could see her wince in pain as her hand went up to rub her temple - a sign that Al recognized as a headache. “Hey babe. You okay?”

Kaylani didn’t know how to answer. The minute her eyes opened, they landed on Ryan. He held her gaze and refused to look away. She could visibly see the love, hope, regret, and longing in his eyes. It hurt to just look at his face and she could feel tears welling up in her eyes so she turned around and buried her face in Jake’s chest as she clung to him like he was the last person on Earth. She inhaled his scent to calm her down slightly but the tears had already started flowing as sobs racked through her body.

“Shh. Babe, it’s okay. I got you. You’re fine. I got you.” Jake could feel his heart breaking with every cry that slipped from Kaylani’s perfectly pink lips. He knew she was in a fragile state and he didn’t want to lie to her by saying everything would be okay because he knew it wouldn’t. She had just gotten over Ryan only for him to pop back into her life when she was finally happy again. She didn’t deserve all of this pain and suffering.

Alanis moved behind Kaylani and wrapped her arms around her forming a group hug with Jake. The two knew they would need to comfort her in every way possible. Just like Jake, Alanis couldn’t stand to see her best friend in such a vulnerable state. She looked completely broken.

“Come on Kay, let’s move to your room and you can get some rest.” Alanis knew that after a heavy crying session Kaylani would need to sleep. She would need to relax before this entire situation was explained. She could only handle one surprise at a time and any more stress would cause her to have an anxiety attack. The last thing Alanis wanted for Kaylani was for her to be any more stressed than she already was. It was summer; she was supposed to be having fun not crying every day.

Kaylani nodded her head slightly as Jake gave Alanis a weak smile before lifting her up and carrying her to her room bridal style. He walked up the stairs slowly enough to make sure she didn’t accidentally hit her head on the railing before laying her down gently on her bed.

“They’re in the living room and I’ll be joining them so just text me or Al if you need anything, and I mean anything. Get some sleep Kaylani; we’ll talk when you wake up.” Jake kissed the top of her head and let his lips linger for a few seconds before brushing her hair back and closing her door on his way out. He had to talk to Ryan and Alanis to figure out what was going on before Kaylani woke up.

When Kaylani heard the soft clicking of her door meaning it was closed she grabbed the pillow closest to her and cried softly into it. This was all too much for her. First Harry left and now she finds out her dead ex-boyfriend is actually alive and he’s here. She didn’t know what to think so she did the one thing she could think of - she cried herself to sleep.

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“How is she?” Al couldn’t help but ask this the minute she saw Jake walk through the hallway and into the living room.

“It was one step forward and two steps back.” Alanis knew exactly what Jake had meant. All of the progress Kaylani had made over the last few months was gone. She was back to how she was when she first believed Ryan was dead. “I sat by her door for a little only to hear her crying herself to sleep. I had to walk down here because I couldn’t take it.” Alanis could see the pain in Jake’s eyes. He had sworn to protect her and yet there was nothing he could do because she was broken and it would take her at least a few hours before she would even be willing to leave her bed.

Ryan felt his heart break. He knew what he did was wrong, but he couldn’t help himself. It was a little white lie that went way too far and he didn’t know how to go back on it. What was done was done and there was nothing he could do. He just wanted to apologize to Kaylani and hold her in his arms again, but he knew that would be impossible. Kaylani would never forgive him and she actually seemed happier with Harry, he wouldn’t be the one to take that away from her.

“I don’t even know what to say to you Ryan. How could you do this to us? To your family? To Kaylani?” Alanis was so disappointed and heartbroken at the sight of Kaylani she didn’t even bother to raise her voice. Yelling would do nothing but wake up Kay and that was the last thing she wanted.

“I can explain.” Ryan didn’t know how to start, but he knew he had to tell Jake and Alanis exactly what happened or else he would be even farther in the deep end. He didn’t want any of this to happen. He just wanted his brother back.

“Then explain or leave.” Alanis snapped. She was slowly losing patience and she could hardly bear to look in his direction. He caused so much pain to Kaylani she didn't even know what to do anymore.

"Wait a minute, if you're alive then Connor...." Jake had already started putting the pieces together the moment Ryan came back in his life last week. He had almost forgotten about Connor because it had been so long since he had last heard from him.

"Yeah..." Ryan looked down at the floor sadly as he heard Jake suck in a deep breath. The pain was still evident in his heart and he knew it would always be there.

"I'm lost." Alanis had absolutely no idea what the twins were talking about. They both looked sad and she didn't know why. Ryan had no reason to be sad - he was the cause of everyone else's pain.

"Alanis, no one knows this but Jake and I aren't just identical twins. We're triplets." Ryan decided to start from the beginning. It would make everything easier for Alanis since Jake had figured it out already. "It's rare but the three of us are identical. It was me, Jake, and our brother Connor. No one ever knew of Connor though because when we were kids he was sent to boarding school. Our parents could barely handle us two, let alone a third kid that was constantly getting in trouble. We hadn't heard from him in almost seven years when out of nowhere he called me. He told me about how he cut off all contact with us because he was determined to get his act together and he didn't want us to see him until he did. He thought my parents and Jake hated him so he called me because he wanted to come and visit but he wouldn't be able to handle the rejection. So, we made a plan and switched places for a few weeks. He said he just wanted to see everyone and that once he graduated he would come back for good. The first week went by smoothly and at first I didn't think anything was wrong until I realized how pale and skinny he looked. Well the next day he apparently walked into the house in tears and that's where everything went wrong. Mom and dad saw him and knew something was up. For a minute he forgot he was pretending to be me so he spilled the fact that he had cancer. There was nothing I could do because I didn't know he had it and I was in another state picking up something I bought for Kaylani. By the time I got back he was gone. It was too late for me to do anything. I didn’t even find out he had cancer until I came home a few days later, just in time for the funeral."

Ryan let a few tears fall as he recalled the last few months. It was rough and he honestly has no idea how he made it through them. He missed Kaylani more than words could explain but he knew he couldn’t just go back to her because it would cause too many problems.

"Why didn't you say something sooner?” Alanis was stunned by what she had just heard. She had no idea that any of this was even possible.

“I couldn’t just randomly show up when I was supposed to be dead. I spent the last few months away from here so I could figure out what the hell I was supposed to do. When I finally figured it out I came back. I wasn’t just going to drop in like this but I saw the tabloids and I had to see for myself if it was true. So I followed you guys around a little and that was when Jake saw me. I saw how happy Kaylani was with Harry and that just made this more complicated. I didn’t mean to show up today but I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t hide this any longer.” Ryan was filled with regret as he made eye contact with his brother and Alanis. He knew he had let this go on for too long but he didn’t know what else to do. He was lost.

“We need to figure out how to explain this to Kaylani. Ryan I love you and I’m beyond ecstatic that you’re actually alive, but you weren’t there for her like we were. She was completely broken when she thought you died. She slipped into a depression and shut the world out. It took us a month before we finally got through to her. We can’t let her go back to that. As much as I love you and as much as I would love to see you both just go back to how things used to be, I know that isn’t going to happen. Harry came along unexpectedly and for the first time in months she was finally happy again. He made her smile a genuine smile in just two weeks and she was broken when he had to go back to London. Then you come back and now we’re back to square one. We need to figure out how to get through to her without confusing her or making her go back into a depression. We can’t see her like that again. It nearly broke me.” Ryan and Alanis could hear the pain in Jake’s voice. Everyone who knew Jake knew that Kay was like his little sister and he would do absolutely anything for her. If it were up to him she would have the world and no one would be able to hurt her. She was too fragile to be hurt.

“I know, and I promise I will figure out a way to tell her. I never intentionally hurt her. If it were up to me I would erase everything that happened and just let her be happy. I would never wish this upon anyone.” Jake studied Ryan for a few moments before finally coming to a decision.

“Okay. We’ll talk to her when she wakes up.” With those final words being said Jake got up and gave his brother a hug. As much as it hurt to know that Connor was gone, he was still glad Ryan was alive. He loved Connor and he would miss him, but Ryan and Jake were closer because of the fact that they were able to grow up together unlike him and Connor.

Alanis followed in Jake’s footsteps and hugged Ryan as well, tears forming at the corners of her eyes. “It’s good to see you Ryan, it really is. I just wish it was under better circumstances.” Alanis gave a sad smile before sitting back down on the couch. She could already tell it was going to be a long week.

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Kaylani had woken up 30 minutes after Jake left her room and was already feeling better. She walked into her bathroom and freshened up before deciding to go downstairs and face the music. She would have to face Ryan sooner or later and the curiosity that was building inside of her would only grow the longer she waited to figure out how he was even here. When she felt confident enough she made her way down the stairs, but she stopped when she heard Alanis talking.

Kaylani sat on the stairs as she listened to the three talk and she made it just in time to hear Ryan explain everything that happened. By the time he was done she couldn’t believe what had happened and she didn’t know what to think of it all. Listening to Jake talk about how she felt after the funeral only made her realize that by allowing her emotions to consume her she wasn’t just hurting herself, she was hurting everyone around her. She promised herself that she wouldn’t let that happen again. She was finally happy with Harry and she knew that as much as she loved Ryan, she wouldn’t be able to go back to how things used to be because of how their relationship ended.

Having decided she heard enough, Kaylani had stood up to go and join the three people in the living room when she felt her phone buzzing in her pocket. She pulled it out in time to see that it was Harry calling her and she knew that just the sound of his voice would calm her down a little bit more. She knew it was crazy how she felt about him this early in their relationship but she also knew that it was the first time she has felt happy in a while and she deserved that.

Letting a faint smile appear on her lips, Kaylani ran back up the stairs and into her room before finally answering her phone. “Hey Hazza.” She could hear Harry chuckle at the greeting, she was one of the few who actually called him by the nickname.

“Hello, love. I miss you already.” Kaylani could hear the sadness in Harry’s voice and it made her realize that it had only been a day since they had last seen each other. With the events of today it seemed like so much longer though.

“I miss you too. It’s been crazy here.” Harry noticed the way her voice shook when she spoke. He could tell she was nervous or anxious about something but he didn’t know what.

“Is everything okay? You sound nervous.” Kaylani knew he would be able to pick up on her voice shaking. She was nervous about the reality of having to talk to Ryan after finally accepting that he was gone forever.

“It’s a really long story that I don’t want to explain over the phone.” Kaylani let out a sigh as she spoke. She could already feel the weight of everything going on start to build up as she finally took the time to realize that everything that happened was actually real and not just a sick and twisted dream. “I’ll explain when we have a Skype date or when I see you again.”

“Speaking of seeing me again, I have fantastic news!” Kaylani couldn’t help but let a large smile take over her face as she heard the obvious excitement in Harry’s voice. For a few minutes she let the events that happened earlier escape her mind as she focused on the one boy who successfully made her feel whole again. “We scheduled for you, Alanis, and Jake to come and visit us! Before you say anything we already talked to your parents and they made sure it was the perfect time. We wanted to surprise you all."

"And when will this be?" Kaylani didn't bother hiding the amusement in her voice. She was happy she would be able to see Harry again and possibly escape the drama that seemed to follow her everywhere.

"That is a surprise I'm afraid. Don't worry about when you need to pack because your parents ensured they will have you covered when it comes time. But I can tell you that you'll be with us for a month!" Kaylani could picture the large grin on Harry's face. She was beyond excited for this trip and she knew Harry was keeping the date of her departure a secret as a way to torture her.

Knock knock

When she heard someone knocking on her door Kaylani knew she had to face reality. She couldn't keep pushing off her inevitable discussion with Ryan and she knew the longer she did the worse it would end up.

She couldn't help but let out a sigh because she would be ending her conversation with Harry. "I have to go Haz, someone's at my door."

"Alright love. I'll call you later and I'll text you and I'll figure out a day for our Skype date." Kaylani let out a chuckle at the enthusiasm in Harry's voice. He sounded so happy and carefree.

"Of course you will. I'll talk to you later."

"Talk to you later princess." Harry made a dramatic kissing noise into the phone causing Kay to giggle before hanging up.

When she heard the familiar click of the conversation ending she let a large sigh escape her lips as she prepared for what was about to happen. Harry's call made her feel slightly better but she still knew it would be a long day.

After taking a few deep breaths Kaylani got up and answered her door only to be faced with Jake's encouraging yet sad smile. "Was that Harry?"

"Yeah." Kaylani felt her cheeks heat up slightly as just the mention of his name.

"I knew he was good for you." Jake felt better knowing that Harry was able to take her mind off of what happened earlier even if it was just for a few minutes. "Are you sure you can handle this?"

Kaylani nodded her head almost instantly. If she didn't do it now she never would. "I'm sure. I at least deserve an explanation. I can't promise things will be okay and I can't promise that I'll be okay but I'll try." Kay gave Jake a small smile of reassurance. "I know things will get better because I have you and Alanis and Harry and the boys. You'll watch out for me. You all promised you would take care of me and I trust you. I'm stronger than I used to be and I refuse to crumble again."

Jake was amazed at the amount of strength this one girl had. She had been through hell and back and she didn't give up. "I love you and I'm here for you Kaylani. Remember that. Now let's go face the music."

Jake laced his fingers with Kaylani’s before he led her out of her room and down the stairs before stopping just outside the living room. He turned around and gave her a reassuring squeeze and smile. "You got this baby girl."

With one last deep breath Kaylani closed her eyes before walking into the living room. The moment she walked in she could smell the aftershave she had been so accustomed to. After a few seconds she finally opened her eyes and immediately made eye contact with the one guy that held her heart in his hands then broke it into a million pieces.

Ryan took a deep breath when he saw her walk into the room. He couldn't help but notice how tense she looked and he knew that was most likely his fault. She looked even more beautiful than she did when he last saw her. When she opened her eyes they made eye contact almost immediately and he felt his heartbeat increase just at the sight of the chocolate brown eyes he loved. As selfish as it was, it was in that moment he knew that he would never let her out of his life again. He made that mistake once, he would be damned if he let her go again.

Notes