-Amanda's POV-

I walk upstairs, but stop because I hear Niall sobbing.
He calls someone.
So I sit at the top step and listen.
Niall goes to the kitchen the puts his phone on speaker.

"Hey Harry. Um.." Niall stutters
"Niall... Are you crying?" Harry asks.
"Well um, Amanda broke up with me, again." Niall sits at the table.
"So I'm not going to be at Amanda's Christmas surprise party." Niall sighs.

Christmas surprise party?

"I'd love to come and I already got her Christmas gift. But it will hurt to much to show I still love her in front of everyone, knowing she doesn't have the same feelings anymore." Niall starts crying a little again.
"Oh Niall. Don't think like that of course she still loves you." Harry says.
"It doesn't feel like that. But anyways. I guess you'll have to do the Christmas surprise party without me. Sorry mate. Well. Bye." Niall sighs.
"It's okay lad. We'll talk in person tomorrow. Bye." Harry hangs up.

I run into my room, close the door then grab my diary.

Dear diary,
I just had the worst break up ever. With Niall. He got beaten up today by Dylan and his friends.
Niall is now sobbing and talking to Harry. They have this Christmas surprise party planned for me.
Niall said he won't be there but he already have a Christmas gift for me. He says he doesn't feel I love him anymore. But I will never stop loving him. I don't know what to do.
~Amanda

I then hear someone walk upstairs and knock on my room door.
I walk up and open it.

"Amanda, Can I quickly use the washroom, then I'll leave." Niall said.
I sighed.
"Ok fine." I say then close the door again.

I slam my own body onto my bed.
I sob into my pillow.
He just wants to use the washroom, then leave me?
He's not gonna even try to get my back like last time?
Does he care anymore?

Well a sound knocks me out of my thoughts.
The sound of whispers/screaming.
I run out of my room and into the washroom to see a bloody mess at the sink and Niall
using a blade and cutting himself deeper than last time.

"Niall!" I yell.
I grab the blade out of his hand and he sits on the floor.
I drop on me knee's beside him.
"What are you doing?" I ask him
"You breaking up with me earlier torn me. I have absolutely no one anymore." Niall cries into his hands.
"No. no no no no no no no no no. Don't you dare cry!" I say.
I hate to see him cry. Just so much! I just HATE it!
He sniffs.
I hold his hand and bring him to my room.
He sits on my bed and I take out my first aid kit from under my bed.
I take out hand sanitizer and squirt some into my hand.
"This will sting a little." I say.

I grab his hand and apply the hand snaitizer over his scars.
"That will kill any germs that get into your cuts." I whip his tears. Then continue to work on his cuts.
I grab the white bandages from my first aid kit then wrap his arm.
As I wrap his arms he stares at me.
I finish up then look up at him.

"I'm gonna clean up the washroom. Rest here." I say then leave.

Why would he do it again? I grab some cleaning supplies from under the sink and start to clean the sink itself.
I then see Niall at the corner of my eye, watching me clean.
"What are you doing?" He asks me.
I turn around.
"Cleaning up your mess." I say.
"Exactly."
I stare at him.
"What?"
"It's my mess. Why are you cleaning it?" Niall asks.
"Well your hurt you shouldn't do anything except rest. Go back to my room. We'll talk later." I sigh.

-After she cleans-
I walk into my room and see Niall looking at a picture of us together that I famed and put beside me bed. Crying as he looks at it.
I lean on my frame door.
"We've been through so much. Why did you have to break me. Break my heart? Break us?" He asks.
He then grabs the pillow beside him and was about to cry into it but noticed it was wet.
"Did you cry into this?" He asks.
I nod, then drop on the floor and cover my face with my sleeves and cry into them.
I then get a call.
I pick up my phone.
"H-Hello?" I ask
"Amanda we're coming over now. open your door." Liam says then hands up.

I stand up then walk out of my room.
I open the main door. Niall behind me.
"Amanda- wait are you crying?" Zayn asks.
"What d-do you w-want?" I ask.
They all stare at me seriously

Notes

Really long chapter I have here. Aweh so emotional