that day...
Chapter 19
*NIALLS POV*
So we were talking about the movie and Mya kept saying she was scared so i just grabbed her hand under the table.
She blushed
I love it when she blushes. its adorable.
I want her to be the only girl in my life.
I really do love her but i dont know if she feels the same way
I need her to marry me.
There is only one way to find out.
It was getting quiet so i started talking.
I didnt care that the girls and lads would be there.
"So Mya..ummm i-i-i love you a-and.."
i wa really nervous!
"yea.." she said but i was just so nervous
"a-and i w-want you to b-be with m-m-me forever."
i got down on one knee and looked for the ring in my pocket.
i looked at her smiling nervously but my smile didnt last as soon as i saw her crying..but not from happiness.
*MYAS POV*
No..he cant be proposing
he doesnt love me
Im sure he doesnt im worthless and stupid
I started crying from all my thoughts
I was scared to fall in love ...because my dad.. I mean steve did all those things to me .
I couldnt take this anymore i was crying badly so i ran out and i could here Els and Perries footsteps behind me. I looked back at Ni ..he looked so hurt and disappointed just there on one knee.
I cried harder.
i ran outside..i called a taxi and got in.
El and Perrie went in with me.
I was just crying
"What happened back there Mya?" El said
"Yeah!! he loves you and he just proposed to you!!" Perrie backed her up
"L-L-Look i know i know he proposed! IM JUST SCARED TO HAVE SOMEONE LOVE ME AFTER WHAT STEVE DID!!!!"
i yelled with hurt and anger
"Mya ots okay i know but do you love Niall?" El asked me
silence
"YES! i do but im afraid." i looked at them both.
it was quiet the rest of the ride to Perries house
i couldnt go back to Els flat because of what happened 3 months ago with Louis.
We arrived to her flat.
"You can crash here i dont mind" Perrie broke the silence
"Thank you ..i need to talk to Ni tomarrow ts going to be so hard."
i love him.
But Im afraid.
How am i going to get over this?
*NIALLS POV*
The girls and mya ran out.
i was left on one knee crying.
Lou came over to my side to help me up.
"Woah ..you really just did that?" harry said
"YES HARRY I DID!!!! I LOVE HER AND I WANT TO BE WITH HER FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!!" i said mad and hurt.
"Ayye! Ca down Niall! please i know your hurt but cmon he didnt mean it like that." Zayn said
"Yeah Im sorry mate i didnt mean it like that." harry said and pulled me into a hug.
I cried into his shoulder.
What was that? did Mya not love me anymore?
All these questions were going through my head.
I couldnt help it.
"Im done."
"Woah mate what are you talking about?!?!?" Liam said worried
"i cant do it anymore. (crying) she left for 3 months. She just ran out on me (crying) when i confessed how much i love her...im done i cant do this anymore." i cried even harder.
"Please dont do this to mya she has had a bad past you know that! NIALL SHES AFRAID OF LOVE!!!! cut her some slack!"
Liam said worried
"I love her mate."
"okay then go after her." Lou said
"I love her so much Im willing to let her go so she can be happy and problem free." i walked out and left them with shocked faces.
I guess if i just disappear nothing will happen.
Im done.
I know it looks like i have no problems but truth is..until i found mya i was a broken guy who cared about what everyone said. Who was the guy in the band no one payed attention to. My family didnt want me. I got kicked out but i made it in One Direction. i was going to jump the bridge 6 months ago but then i met Mya. Im madly in love with her. But now i know she doesnt love me. Its time.
So we were talking about the movie and Mya kept saying she was scared so i just grabbed her hand under the table.
She blushed
I love it when she blushes. its adorable.
I want her to be the only girl in my life.
I really do love her but i dont know if she feels the same way
I need her to marry me.
There is only one way to find out.
It was getting quiet so i started talking.
I didnt care that the girls and lads would be there.
"So Mya..ummm i-i-i love you a-and.."
i wa really nervous!
"yea.." she said but i was just so nervous
"a-and i w-want you to b-be with m-m-me forever."
i got down on one knee and looked for the ring in my pocket.
i looked at her smiling nervously but my smile didnt last as soon as i saw her crying..but not from happiness.
*MYAS POV*
No..he cant be proposing
he doesnt love me
Im sure he doesnt im worthless and stupid
I started crying from all my thoughts
I was scared to fall in love ...because my dad.. I mean steve did all those things to me .
I couldnt take this anymore i was crying badly so i ran out and i could here Els and Perries footsteps behind me. I looked back at Ni ..he looked so hurt and disappointed just there on one knee.
I cried harder.
i ran outside..i called a taxi and got in.
El and Perrie went in with me.
I was just crying
"What happened back there Mya?" El said
"Yeah!! he loves you and he just proposed to you!!" Perrie backed her up
"L-L-Look i know i know he proposed! IM JUST SCARED TO HAVE SOMEONE LOVE ME AFTER WHAT STEVE DID!!!!"
i yelled with hurt and anger
"Mya ots okay i know but do you love Niall?" El asked me
silence
"YES! i do but im afraid." i looked at them both.
it was quiet the rest of the ride to Perries house
i couldnt go back to Els flat because of what happened 3 months ago with Louis.
We arrived to her flat.
"You can crash here i dont mind" Perrie broke the silence
"Thank you ..i need to talk to Ni tomarrow ts going to be so hard."
i love him.
But Im afraid.
How am i going to get over this?
*NIALLS POV*
The girls and mya ran out.
i was left on one knee crying.
Lou came over to my side to help me up.
"Woah ..you really just did that?" harry said
"YES HARRY I DID!!!! I LOVE HER AND I WANT TO BE WITH HER FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!!" i said mad and hurt.
"Ayye! Ca down Niall! please i know your hurt but cmon he didnt mean it like that." Zayn said
"Yeah Im sorry mate i didnt mean it like that." harry said and pulled me into a hug.
I cried into his shoulder.
What was that? did Mya not love me anymore?
All these questions were going through my head.
I couldnt help it.
"Im done."
"Woah mate what are you talking about?!?!?" Liam said worried
"i cant do it anymore. (crying) she left for 3 months. She just ran out on me (crying) when i confessed how much i love her...im done i cant do this anymore." i cried even harder.
"Please dont do this to mya she has had a bad past you know that! NIALL SHES AFRAID OF LOVE!!!! cut her some slack!"
Liam said worried
"I love her mate."
"okay then go after her." Lou said
"I love her so much Im willing to let her go so she can be happy and problem free." i walked out and left them with shocked faces.
I guess if i just disappear nothing will happen.
Im done.
I know it looks like i have no problems but truth is..until i found mya i was a broken guy who cared about what everyone said. Who was the guy in the band no one payed attention to. My family didnt want me. I got kicked out but i made it in One Direction. i was going to jump the bridge 6 months ago but then i met Mya. Im madly in love with her. But now i know she doesnt love me. Its time.
12/2/13