Gray was a ball of nerves, they were leaving in three hours to the hotel for Mila's wedding. She had to deal with the stress and awkwardness of it all for a week. Mila and Curtis had a grand idea of going there early and having a joint bachelor/bachelorette party four days before the wedding. Of course that meant that all of the guys were coming too. Gray couldn't wait for it all to be over. All she had to do was to get through five days of not running into Liam.

The last four months flew by. Gray had a hard time remembering it all. She continued to work long hours, helping any student who came in. It helped her keep her mind off of anything to do with her personal life. She hadn't spoken to Liam or any of the guys since that faithful call during her drunken walk. Gray still felt embarrassed about it all. She looked like a complete fool. Gray couldn't come to the fact of it all. It was better to forget. Gray was ready to move on. She decided to get through this one last gathering and then move, literally. She had been scoping out a dream job in Milwaukee and was considering on taking it. Gray secretly made an interview for two days off the wedding party ended without telling anyone. She didn't need her drama ruining Mila's big day.

"We are here," Gloria announced, pulling the family van into the parking lot of the hotel. Gray looked around knowing that Liam was somewhere within the same zip code of her.

"Take this," her mom said, handing her a gift. Gray looked at her funny, why was she getting a gift? Gray stuck her hand in, pulling out a small silver flask. 'Stay Strong' was engraved on the front. She looked on her mom with wide eyes, shaking the bottle hearing the liquid move in it.

"What is it," Gray questioned, starting to laugh. Her mom worked in weird ways.

"You need some liquid courage. Your legs have been shaking since we left the house," Gloria smiled at her. Gray reached over hugging her mom. She had been very quiet since the breakup, but she always knew when Gray needed a kick in the right direction.

"Alright, let's get out and go find the bride." All of the girls left the car carrying suitcases and dress bags to the entrance. Gloria checked in at the counter and handed Gray a key.

"You got two rooms?"

"Yup, figured you may need some alone time," Gloria told her wiggling her eyebrows. Gray wished she could hit her, but her arms were covered in dresses. Gloria should consider herself lucky.

"Let's go," Gray dictated to them all. They headed up the elevator and Gray's legs still didn't stop. She felt like she was being watched at every turn.

"Relax and drink the flask," her mom murmured to her. Gray couldn't wait to pop it open. The elevator dinged open and Gray immediately scanned the hallway. Thankfully it was clear.

"How about we get our things put away and head for the hot tub?" Gloria offered. Grace and Gillian cheered behind them. Gray didn't mind the idea, a soak in warm water sounded very relaxing. She went to her separate room and dropped down everything on the extra bed. Her phone started going off right away.

"Hi Mila," she answered.

"Woman! Are you here, where are you," Mila screamed.

"In my room, 488. Come on over." Within five minutes, Mila was knocking like crazy on her door. Gray swung it open, only to be attacked in hugs from her.

"Mila, you are going to crush me," she laughed. Mila pulled back with tears in her eyes. The engagement had changed her, for the better. She had become more emotional and endearing, not the typical no nonsense attitude.

"What can we do? I'm going crazy, I need to do something," Mila said, talking a mile a minute. Gray walked over and grabbed the flask.

"Drink," she ordered. Mila gulped down the bottle, not saving any for Gray. She immediately stopped shaking so much and breathed.

"Better," Gray asked.

"Much."

"We are heading the pool, come down with us." Gray grabbed her only two suits out of her bag and threw one at Mila. She wanted to ask her so badly about where the boys were, but she decided to keep to herself.

"They should be here soon," Mila said quietly. Damn her for knowing Gray so well.

"All," Gray asked. She couldn't say his name.

"Yep." Gray's hands began to shake again; her nerves were going to give her grey hair.

"No worries Gray Goose, it's going to be a fun week. I promise."

----

The water felt amazing to Gray. She and Mila somehow beat the rest of the girls down there, so they had some quiet time before things got loud again.

"You ready for this all," Gray asked. Mila smiled at her.

"I'm beyond excited. I never thought I'd get married," she gushed.

"Why not? You are amazing. Of course some guy would be sucked into you. I just never thought it would be Curtis," Gray joked. They both sat there, enjoying the water when they heard it.

"HARRRRYYYY!" Gray froze. She knew that name and she knew that voice. Grace had found them. She was smart and positioned her back against the windows so she wouldn't be able to see anyone who came in. Mila saw it all happen immediately.

"Don't move Gray, you are fine." She whispered. Gray didn't, her eyes were as big as saucers. Mila could see all five guys talking to Gloria and the girls.

"HARRY," Grace yelled again, running into his arms. She hugged him tight while the others looked on.

"There are my sons," Grace cooed, giving them all a quick hug. She could tell Liam was barely able to control himself. His eyes darted around, either looking for Gray or ready to get the hell out of there.

"Hey Gloria and girls! Where is your stubborn sister," Louis asked them all. Gillian pointed through the window, letting them see Gray and Mila in the hot tub. Mila waved at them, but Gray wouldn't turn around. The group, minus Liam opened the pool door.

"Gray Goose, eh!" Louis yelled. She slowly turned around, giving them a small wave. It felt like her body was experiencing an earthquake. The guys all waved back before she turned around. Thankfully her eyes didn't see Liam. That was her goal. The less time he was in her vision, the better the week would go.

"I'm heading up," Liam barked out, bypassing them all and headed to the elevators. They all waited until the doors closed to talk.

"I see he is taking this all well," Gloria said.

"Don't let him fool you. It's killing him to be this close to her and not able to do anything. He made us hurry and get to the damn airport an hour early, then continued to pace until we could board the plane," Harry told her.

"You all figure out a plan yet?" They shook their heads no.

"No need, it's going to happen on its own."

Gray felt the huge need to cry in the hot tub. They all looked so different; she couldn't even picture them anymore. Liam especially, she thought he would at least attempt to see her.

"He hates me," she choked out. Mila wadded through the water to sit next to her.

"You don't know that love," she comforted her. Gray's body continued to sob.

"I am such a fool." Gray let it all out. She told Mila about everything that happened on her drunken night. Everything about Liam coming on the phone and treating her like a child, making her fell like a horrible person. Her body shuddered talking about him being so cold.

"See. He really does want nothing to do with me," she cried. Mila didn't know what to say. She never knew what happened that night and Gray never brought it up. Her mind was going crazy trying to figure out how to fix it all.

----

Mila left Gray in the hands of Gloria, making up an excuse about having to talk to Curtis. She marched up the floor, pounding on the Louis' door. She demanded answers.

"There is the blushing bride," he joked, opening the door. Everyone was in there except Liam. She knew he should consider himself damn lucky right now. Mila wanted to kill him. She rushed into the room and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Start talking now. What the hell happened when they spoke on the phone? How come nobody told me this?"

"She didn't tell you," Zayn asked.

"Hell no. I just found out now as she cried and shook like a leaf in the hot tub. What happened," Mila asked again.

"Gray called me all drunk. It was five in the morning where we were and it scared the hell out of me. I went into the living room of our suite to talk to her and they all heard me and came out. Once Liam realized it was Gray he ripped the phone out of my phone. He was beyond rude to her; even though we could all see that it pained him. Trust us Mila, we chewed his ass out of days after that. Liam was a dick and he knew it. He made up some excuse about it having to be that way," Niall explained to her. She sat down on the bed next to Harry wondering where everything went wrong.

"Jesus, I cannot keep up with this all," she groaned.

"Hey, at least you didn't have to be around him for all these months. It's been living with an adolescent. Most days we wanted to ring his neck," Louis told her.

"Should we do something," she asked him.

"Highly doubt it. This is going to work out without our help. Both of them will pull to each other without our doing," Louis assured her.

"I hope you are right. She is going to completely break soon."

----

Gray made it through the night without running into anyone she didn't want to see. There were no wedding duties to be done, so her and the girls went out for pizza. Tonight was another story though; it was the big night of bachelor fun. She set up a game plan of staying close to Mila and the other bridesmaids, and to not drink too much and become stupid. That one was a must. Mila chose to do a black and white theme, making it incredibly easy for her to find a dress. She was feeling fearless the day she bought it. It was short, barely covering her butt and had cut outs on each side. Super simple, but extremely sexy. Gray checked her hair once more before leaving her room and heading to Mila's. She shut her door and immediately heard cattails being tossed her way.

"Gray goose, you grew up," Harry joked. All four boys, minus Liam were walking towards her. She sheepishly smiled. Gray had been avoiding them all, still not able to face them.

"Hey guys," she quietly said. They circled her into a huge group hug.

"Hey guys? That's it?! What about ‘Hey fellas, I have missed you. Sorry I haven't called in seven months’," Louis joked, trying to mimic her American accent. Gray sadly smiled at up at them all.

"I've been busy." She knew none of them believed it, but it was the best she could do.

"Liar, come on let's go find the party. You are lucky enough to have four very attractive men as your dates tonight," Louis told her. They all headed into the elevator and up to Mila's floor.

"Is.. is he coming," she asked, immediately feeling her face blush.

"Yup. I believe he is already up there actually. Had to talk to Curtis about groomsman duties." Gray silently groaned forgetting about that. She practically strangled Steve when he told her. It was a sick joke. The elevator opened and they walked to short distance to Mila's room.

"Party is here," Niall cheered walking in. Gray held up the end of the line, taking tiny breaths to help herself not hyperventilate. It only took her seconds to see him, it was a small room. He looked good, so amazingly good. Liam had cut his hair shorter, letting it into a very small faux hawk on the top of his head. He had on tight black pants and a white shirt rolled up exposing his tattoos. Gray could still see his bracelet on his wrist clear as day. She always wondered if he wore it or not. It gave her hope. Of what though, she didn’t know.

"Jesus," she heard him silently whisper. The group was completely silent. There were fifteen of them shoved into a tiny room, all staring at Gray or Liam. She felt her face blush immediately.

"Let's go," she cheered, leading the pack out. Thank god she could wedge herself between others. Niall and Zayn positioned their bodies on each side of her.

"No worries Gray, we have you," Niall smiled. She linked her arms in theirs, but she knew he was still looking at her. Gray looked behind her shoulder, seeing him stare her down with a hard glaze. She turned back fast, kicking herself inside for getting caught. It was like she was always pulled to him, no matter the circumstances. Mila and Curtis decided to get a party bus to bring them around to all the 18+ clubs, since three of the guys couldn’t drink yet. She knew Mila would let them at the wedding though, she pulled strings with the hotel for it to happen. They all climbed onto the bus after taking tons of pictures. Gray positioned herself outside next to Niall so Liam couldn’t stand near her. Thank God. On the bus, she followed suit, sitting down next to him again.

“So Gray, how’s life,” he asked as the bus started to move.

“Stressful.” Gray knew it without seeing it. Liam sat in a seat where he could see her, right between the cracks of hers and Niall’s seats. If Gray squinted enough, she could make out his face.

“I bet, you didn’t have to ride on a plane with Mr. Happy pants over there,” Niall whispered causing Gray to crack up.

“He looks real happy to be here.” She rolled her eyes, letting Niall know she was being a sarcastic ass.

“Please, don’t let him fool you. He is beyond happy to be here and to see you. He just hates that he can’t touch you,” Niall explained. Gray looked through the seats again. Liam was no longer looking at her, but making conversation with Curtis.

“Is that why he was a complete jackass to me over the phone,” Gray asked bitterly. She still wasn’t over the way he treated her.

“Don’t worry Gray, we all were pissed at him then. He was completely mad treating you like that. Louis let him have it many times. He is just lost right now and not sure of what to do. I’d tell you to go easy on him, but I am afraid you will punch me,” Niall joked. Gray smiled but stayed quiet. She stared out the window feeling even more confused. She couldn’t understand why he would become such an ass if he still loved her. It was nuts.

----

I’m getting married bitches,” Mila screamed out, causing all the girls to yell. They were on their second stop of the night and Gray was already feeling the effects for the four drinks she had. She knew inside she needed to slow it down, otherwise she would break her cardinal rule of being drunk and stupid.

“I wanna dance,” she yelled out. Mila was in her own little world flirting with Curtis and ignoring her. Gray pouted, someone was going to dance with her if they liked it or not. Gray scanned the group, looking for a lonely soul to shake it with. Zayn and Louis were a no; she didn’t need those videos online for sure. Even with liquor in her, she wasn’t stupid. Gray walked over to the guys, taking it slow knowing she was swaying again. They watched her closely, just waiting for her to completely fall over.

“Harold,” she announced to them,” you are coming with me.”

Gray grabbed his hand and pulled him to the dance floor. He went with ease and made she they got their safely. Gray’s body couldn’t stop moving even she tried.

“Dance Harold,” she yelled to him over the music. Harry stood there while Gray started to dance around him. He was in a catch 22 kind of moment. Of course he wanted to dance with her and cut loose, but having to deal with the wrath of Liam didn’t sound ideal. Gray caught on to what he was doing.

“Harry, forgot about him. I’ll deal with him later.” Gray grabbed his hands making him dance with her. The music changed to something with a faster beat and Gray turned around, grinding her hips into his. She continued to hold on to his hands and laughed while they danced. Harry quickly turned her around, dipping her in the dance floor.

“Figured he needed a bigger show,” Harry told her. Gray was still being dipped, but she looked back to see Liam glaring into her back.

“You are going to get me in trouble,” Gray giggled to him. Harry twirled her again, letting her body stand up right.

“Nope, just pushing things along,” he told her. Gray looked at him funny, what did he mean? Gray’s brain was fuzzy enough without having to think.

“What do you mean?” Harry ignored her, pulling her back to the group in the VIP section.

“Someone get her another drink!” Gray glared at him. He was ignoring her on purpose and not answering her question.

“Come on Goose, let’s hit the bar,” Louis said, standing up next to her. She was thankful at least one of them could drink.

“What was he talking about Louis,” she asked wobbling on her feet at the private bar.

“Nothing.”

“Don’t joke with me. I know I have been drinking, a lot, but I know you all aren’t telling me something,” Gary sternly told him.

“Gray, I will bet you two hundred dollars right now that before these wedding festivities are over, you will be with Liam,” Louis told her honestly. Gray stared at him. She really had to think this one though. Two hundred dollars is a lot of money. She quickly tipped back to the rest of her drink before looking at him.

“You are on Mr. Tomlinson.”

----

Gray forgot all about being a smart drinker when they hit bar number 5. She was feeling extremely loose. The girls all took turns dancing provocatively with each other and doing numerous amounts of shots.

“Let’s get on the bar,” Mila cheered. She and Gray climbed up on the bar stools barely being able to make it in their heels. Gray got up first, pulling her shoes off and flinging them to the ground. Drunk dancing was the best. Mila laughed her butt off, copying Gray’s move with throwing her own shoes off.

“I freaking love you,” Mila screamed to her. Gray threw her arms around Mila, almost knocking them off the bar. The guys below were freaking out. Two girls with barely any clothes on a high, small bar was a bad idea.

“You are going to kill me,” Mila giggled.

“Nope, I love you too much for that,” Gray screamed back. She threw her hands up in the air and walked farther down the bar. She was enjoying the music, in her own little world, not realizing Liam was staying very close to her below. He knew it would only take one move for her butt would fall right off.

“Liam! I see what you are doing,” Mila yelled across the bar, calling him out. Gray looked down to see what she was talking about. Liam’s big brown eyes stared up at her. They went straight to her heart. Gray drew in a breath, wishing she had a drink to hide behind. Gray looked away from him, walking fast to go meet up with Mila again. The party had to live on! Gray took one step only to land on a puddle of water. Her foot slipped, making her fall of the bar. She heard Mila scream on the way down. Instead of landing on the floor, Harry was behind her catching her body before it happened.

“Because I’m freeee! Free falling,” Gray sang at the top of her lungs, laughing the whole time. Harry lowered her body to the floor, making sure her feet were stable before letting go of her.

“Easy there Gray,” Harry told her. Gray broke away from his arms.

“I need a drink,” Gray announced. Liam was suddenly right beside her.

“I think you need to go back to the hotel,” Liam said quietly. Gray was about to tell him off when Curtis stepped in.

“I think we all do actually. Bars are closing up shop anyway,” he told her, trying to stop the friction between him. Gray walked away from them both and pulled Mila into the bathroom.

“He is such an asshole,” Mila yelled. She paced the bathroom, ready to beat on anything. Her hands balled up at her sides. Liam needed to stop caring for her so much when he wanted nothing to do with her.

“Please girl, he just wants you,” Mila said, barely able to speak without laughing. She continued to giggle even with Gray looking pissed.

“He wants me to be a proper little girl. Fuck that.” Gray had reached the point in her alcohol binge where she thought she could be a street fighter. It should have been a sign to herself to go to bed, but no one can think straight when they have had that much liquor.

“Come on, let’s get to the bus and go. I’m hungry.” Mila pulled her along, through the crowd and back on the bus with everyone else. Liam was sitting in the back by himself and the boys were around him making small talk. Gray felt brave; every part of her body was strong right now. She marched down the bus aisle and dramatically sat in the seat next to her. Liam looked down at her, not changing his expression.

“Why do you hate me so much,” she asked him, speaking louder then she should.

“I could never hate you Gray.” She rolled her eyes at him.

“Puhlease. That is such a lie. You treat me like dog shit on the phone, and now you just stalk me instead of talking to me, like a human being.” Gray turned in the seat once the bus starting moving. She threw her legs under her, making her dress dangerously close to showing off her body.

“Gray, I love you. And you know that, you just had too much liquor to realize it,” he gritted through his teeth.

“Can we pretend to be normal then,” her puppy dog eyes asked him.

“We were never normal love, you know that.” Liam finally smiled at her. Gray immediately blushed. It had been a while since she saw him look happy. Gray wanted to be near him. She positioned her head on his shoulder, wrapping her arms around his and locking their fingers together.

“What are you doing,” he asked but didn’t stop her.

“Showing you how to not be a complete dick.” She snuggled into him closer, suddenly feeling very tired. The alcohol party mood had been switched off, and now Gray just wanted to sleep. Lots and lots of sleep.

“Gray Cameron! You are such a whore!” She heard Mila giggle and yell to her. Gray throw her hands in the air, cheering but she kept her eyes closed. She put her arms back down, feeling Liam reach for her hand and wrapped his fingers around hers once again. Gray sighed. Best way to fall asleep ever is when you are cuddled into your ex boyfriend wearing barely anything and having the whole room spin from alcohol.

----

Gray woke up the next morning feeling better then she thought. She sat up, trying to get her surroundings. Her room was dark and she had clothes on, but she couldn’t remember how she got home. The last thing she could remember was deciding to dance on a bar. Other than that, it was pretty blank. She sat up and stretched. Her stomach felt like she ate rocks all night. Damn those sugary drinks. Gray needed food now, or she was going to get sick. She threw on a sweatshirt and sweatpants and quickly ran her fingers through her hair for a ponytail before headed out.

The elevator ride was quick and opened to show the continental breakfast set up. She saw no one around and ran on over. They had donuts, crescents, yogurt, muffins, fruit; everything she needed to soak up the alcohol in her body.

“Gray Goose!” She turned around to see all the guys, including Liam sitting at a table in the far side of the room.

“Come join us,” Niall called out. Gray grabbed two danishes, a banana and a box of Frosted Flakes and headed over taking the last remaining open spot next to Zayn. Thankfully Liam was on the other side of the table and at the opposite end.

“Interesting choice there,” Zayn commented, motioning to her food. Gray picked up one of the Danishes and took a bite.

“Semi hangover food,” she smiled. It tasted so much better than she thought. Thank god for good food.

“Did you enjoy yourself last night,” Louis smiled cheeky at her.

“From what I remember, I think it was a good night.”

“What do you remember,” Zayn asked. All five guys were staring intently at her. Gray felt like she was missing something, yet again.

“Dancing with Harry, that I remember,” she blushed just thinking about it. Poor Harry got the brunt of her drunken debacle.

“Shots, I know there were a lot of shots. Louis I remember talking to you. Did I dance on a bar?” That part was still blurry to her.

“You did, which lasted about ten minutes before you fell off,” Niall informed.

“I fell off a bar? No way!” Gray definitely didn’t remember that.

“You did, Harry caught your drunk self.” Harry blushed. Gray reached over the table and cheers him with her muffin.

“Rock on Styles, I knew you were good for something,” she laughed silently praying no one had pictures of that.

“You are quite welcome. So you don’t remember anything else?” Gray looked at them again; all but Liam was staring at her.

“Negative, why did I do something stupid?” She could only imagine what could have happened.

“Oh no! Not at all, not at all, “Louis said giving her a look. She knew that look, it meant he was up to no good.

“Spit it out Louis, what did I do?”

“Nothing Gray, honest. You were a good girl the whole way home, except showing your panties to everything, but that is nothing,” he explained. Gray rolled her eyes. She wasn’t stupid, she knew them for all long enough to know a lie when she heard it.

“I think I’m going to take this breakfast to go. See you all tonight.” Gray left the room not looking back. She wasn’t hung over, but she didn’t have time for their bull. All of the guys waited until she left to say anything.

“How about you Liam, care to talk about last night,” Louis asked him. Liam shrugged; he didn’t see what the big deal was. Gray fell asleep on his shoulder, he carried her up to her room and put her to bed. It wasn’t hard to figure out. Gray called him out for being mean, so he decided to be nicer.

“She fell asleep, I carried her up,” he simply said. All the guys groaned.

“My God Liam get your head out and just admit you want her back,” Louis yelled at him.

“I want her back.” He knew that, who wouldn’t want her back really.

“Welcome to the dark side my man. So can I be the one to tell her about her knight in shining armor,” Zayn asked, patting him on the back.

“No, none of you are allowed to say anything. We cannot interfere with her anymore. If she wants something to do with me she had to come herself.”

“Are you mad,” Zayn asked. This was the stupidest idea they have ever heard.

“No, I’m not. She had to come to terms with it herself. Her life is different now. I don’t want to hurt her anymore.” It pained Liam to say it, but it was true. He had done enough to her over these past months, even from the beginning of their relationship. He was the one who got her attacked twice. It wasn’t fair to her to be put in that position again. Gray had to make the decision to go back to him, nobody could pressure her.

“Can I at least give her a nudge in the right direction,” Louis asked. Liam shook his head no. It had to happen on her own.

“Don’t you dare Tomlinson, I swear to God,” Liam told her. If anyone was going to push her, it was going to be him.

----

“Oh my god Gray, I’m getting married today.” Mila started crying again. They had only been up for two hours getting their hair done and Mila was on her fourth breakdown of the day. The rehearsal and groom’s dinner went off without a hitch, other than Liam and Gray avoiding each other the whole time. Gray was excited to walk down the aisle with Steve, the best man. Zayn and Harry still wouldn’t tell her what song they were singing though. She was very curious to hear.Both of them wanted to say something, but neither of them could grow a pair to get the job done.

“I’m so happy for you,” Gray gushed, and she really meant it. It’s been amazing to watch Mila and Curtis over these last couple of days and realize how much they loved each other. It a secretive way, she knew she was the cause of their relationship. If she never got together with Liam, Curtis and Mila wouldn’t be here completely in love with each other. Gray loved watching every bit of it.

“Gray, you really are the best person in my life, well other than Curtis. Don’t tell the other girls, but I got you a gift. They would kill in jealously,” Mila joked. She reached down beside the bed and handed Mila a small box.

“Don’t get mad, but Liam helped me pick it out. We both thought it matched your eyes so well,” she whispered. Gray wondered when those two even had time to hang out. It made her warm and fuzzy thinking about it, Mila was her best friend. Gray opened the box to show a simple silver band with a light green stone in the middle It sparkled off the lights above in the salon. It was beautiful and probably cost a pretty penny for Mila. Gray was so shocked, she even let the Liam comment go. It was Mila’s wedding day, she couldn’t chew her out for hanging out with the ex boyfriend.

“Oh Mila, you are too sweet,” Gray reached over, giving her a hug. She wiped the tears from her eyes and sat back, letting the hairdresser finish her hair.

“I’ve never had anything so pretty,” Gray laughed, admiring the ring in the light again.

“How you thought about talking with Liam,” Mila asked quietly. Gray stopped spinning the ring around her finger. She thought about him a lot. Every night to be exact. She could feel the change in them since the bachelorette party, but she couldn’t figure out what. Sure, they weren’t talking right now but it at least felt like a bridge between them had been torn down.

“I’ve thought about it,” Gray said quietly. Mila could of jumped up and did a victory dance hearing that. She knew it would happen, slowly.

“I think you should, even if it’s just for closure, okay? Find time tonight I beg you.” Mila reached over, squeezing Gray’s hand. Gray sighed. She knew what she had to do. It was finally time to say goodbye to Liam and close that door.

Notes

Title Creds: "Without You" by Mariah Carey

Next one should be up tomorrow! I think I'm more excited for you to read it all :D