The Confessions of a Teenage Weirdo

~ J a s m i n e F e r n ~

My brain is hurting like a constipated cat trying to poop through its mouth.

No I am not that weird.. Or AM I?!

"I want you to rock me, rock me, rock me yeah, I want you to hit the pedal heavy metal show me you care!" I sang my hips moving from one side to the other as my hands flew above my head and my legs jiggling around my master bedroom.

I'm 19 and have my own house. HOUSE. Not apartment. A HOUSE.

And that's what you get for being THE Harry Styles sister. You might think it's weird that my last name's Fern not Styles but I got adopted by my mum now at the age of 16 and i'm 19 now.. Older than Harry by a week.

WOOO! Is it weird that i'm a directioner and have a huge crush on them - apart from Haz; ew.

Thud

Thud

"Oh geez please don't be who I think it is" I mumbled walking towards the door still in nothing but my oversized One Direction shirt which I might add actually ends just above my knees. And I'm quite tall. Like maybe around 5'6?

I was suprised that Louis was standing there with Eleanor confuzzlsion clear on there face as they looked down at my attire that's when I lost it and burst into fits of laughter, as bad as it sounds I almost fell since I was wearing my 4 inch heels. Yes I was wearing them whilst dancing.

"What are you wearing Jaz?" my new best friend El asked me amused. I giggled.

"Directioner fo' eva'!" I said opening the door wider for them to come in. Eleanor giggled aswell taking Louis hand and walking in.

"So who do you want to rock you?" Louis asked amused ruffling my hair.

"Gurl you did not just touch these curls!" I said obviously pissed. Mwahaha... I'm already planning his funeral this damn guy.

"Oh but I did" he said amused. Uh-nah girl.

"Oh hells naw!" I said doing the 'Z' motion with my fingers as I began to be in my sassy faze.

"That is not mah problem" he said in the shaniqua voice. I almost cracked a smile to be honest;

"I'mma woop yo ass!" I exclaimed ready to pounce violently on him that was until i realized that Eleanor was standing in front of me trying to get us to stop sassing each other out.

"Girl! I cannot believe you brought your hypocrite boyfriend in mah house!" I faked angry at her as she chuckled.

"Believe me I don't even know why myself" she said like Louis wasn't even here.

"Hey!" Louis said faking hurt as he put his hand on his heart. I smiled at him.

"So why are you guys here?" I asked faking annoyance.

"Hey!" Louis said faking hurt again hiding his head into the crook of El's neck. I giggled.

"Well you're going on tour with us" El said smiling at me like it's nothing.

"OK cool the- Wait did you just say I was going on tour with you guys?!" I exclaimed happily. That's when I started to hyperventilate holy shit LIAM MAH BBY, WHEN YAH READY COME AND GET IT NA NA NA NA, NA NA NA N-

"Danielles coming" she said looking at my reaction as did Louis.

"Damn it, being a Liam girl is hard!" I said frustrated, even though I absolutely adore Danielle she is quite older than us. Well me any way.

"Yeah we're leaving the day after tomorrow" Louis filled me in the deeeets ? Hehe unicorn.

"So fruzday?" I asked. Fruzday is Friday guys don' worry!

"Fruzday?" Eleanor asked looking at me slightly confused I smiled at her.

"Friday" Louis whispers.

"Well er. You guys probably have to get going right! OK! Bye Love you guys!" I said hushing them out of my house with out a reply.

"I'm going on tour, I'm going on tour!" I sang whilst doing the running man.

Notes