Only You

Taylor's song didn't bother me... mostly. I mean I was embarrassed that a girl I had dated for a little over two weeks had written a fucking song about it, but I was more embarrassed for her than for myself. It was a few lines in particular that kind of got my blood boiling though. She was (supposedly) confirming what people thought they knew about me, that I was your typical rugby lad, didn't care about anyone or anything. But that just wasn't the truth. I just didn't care about her. The line about me having moved on especially made me wince, not because I didn't want Taylor to think I was that kind of guy, but because it reminded me that the girl sitting less than six inches away from me, was out of reach and I couldn't have her.

I was thankful when the song ended and I had managed to calm down by the time Eleanor and Selena were called to take their turn. I watched as Selena followed El to the front of the room and they began sorting themselves out. She turned to the front, looking a little nervous as she introduced the song.

"Ok, so this song is called Teenage Dream, we wrote this collaboratively… I guess it’s about how your first teenage love makes you feel… pretty self explanatory really…" Her eyes began scanning their way across the room as she began plucking the first few notes on the guitar, I could tell that her stage fright was getting worse as it got closer to the point where she would actually have to sing. And then her eyes met mine and it was as though I saw her visibly relax.

"You think I'm pretty without any make up on, you think I'm funny when I tell the punchline wrong..." As she sang I could feel the smile that was beginning to take over my lips uncontrollably. Everyone else in the room disappeared. It was just me and the dark haired goddess of a woman who had every part of me wrapped around her finger with just one line. I had to keep reminding myself, as I sunk into her eyes, that she wasn't singing about me. This song was about Jared.

"...Before you met me, I was alright, but things were kinda heavy, you brought me to life..."

I instantly thought about the first time our eyes had met. Liam had tripped her up as she was walking out the class and I had nudged him in the ribs to tell him to knock it off. Those chocolate brown eyes had looked so deep into mine that I could have sworn she could see my soul and then it was like a switch had flipped inside her. The tears that had been filling her eyes seemed to fade away and instead I could see this powerful defiance that had come to life within her.

"... We can dance, until we die, you and I, we'll be young forever..."

Memories from the other night began filling my head. How Selena had laughed at my shocking inability to dance, while Lou and El had left us to have their own moment alone. I had tried to walk away but she had grabbed my wrist and pulled me back to her, laughing the entire time as she encouraged me to keep dancing and then to make me not look so bad, had then copied my moves. I could have danced with her all night and not cared how much of a fool I looked, just to see her smile like that.

"...My heart stops when you look at me, just one touch, now baby I believe, this is real, so take a chance and don't ever look back..."

The voice that was telling me she was singing about Jared was getting slowly quieter as her eyes held with mine. She was getting as caught up in the music as I was and I was slowly convincing myself that she was singing to me. Louis looked at me from the other side of the table and then back at Selena. She hadn't stopped looking at me for the entire song, even he looked like he believed there was a possibility she wasn't talking about Jared.

"... You can get my heart racing in your skin tight jeans, be my teenage dream tonight..."

I had managed to convince myself that this was written for me, and at this line, I felt Liam, Louis and Niall all look at me instantly, as if they were now fully convinced of the same. The song ended soon after and instead of waiting for Selena and El to come over, I jumped up to go to the bathroom with Louis following shortly behind me.

"Harry-" Louis had started to say cautiously as the door had closed behind him, but I cut him off as I spun around to face him, my heart racing and the adrenaline pumping round my body.

"I know what you're going to say, but I have to ask her... I have to tell her how I feel... That I feel the same! I know you saw that, she was singing to me..." I spluttered at him. He hesitated then took a step toward me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Harry... She may well have been singing to you, but you can't say anything..." My racing thoughts stopped in their tracks as I looked at him questioningly. He sighed and continued, "You promised Gemma..." I went to interrupt him, but he continued talking, "And even if it was about you, she still has a boyfriend... You have to keep your mouth shut... Even if it's obvious that she likes you..."

I was going to protest but stopped. He was right. For the thousandth time, I could have sworn that I heard the cracking sound of my heart in my chest, but this time it was different. This time I couldn't just let it go and let her be happy with him. Louis was still watching me, waiting for an answer.

"Okay, I won't say anything," He nodded and turned to leave but stopped when I continued, "But that doesn't mean I'm not going to help her realise that she feels the same, I'm done sitting back and watching her with him when she should be with me..." He hesitated for a second.

"As long as you don't say anything, she has to say it first..." He said quietly. I nodded and turned to face the mirror. I was surprised to see that I was smiling, but it only encouraged my thoughts that this is what I needed to do. I was going to have to help her see that her place was next to me.

Notes

Hope you guys liked this chapter - let me know what you think!

Love Lola xo