No Regrets?
1.
Bella's pov:
"Ah oh." I gape my mouth, "your cheeky." I poke my daughters nose. I reach for a sponge and pray to the gods that I can get the mess out of Harry's gucci coat, our daughter loves to cause riots everywhere.
"Daddyyy." She grins, revealing her left dimple. I scrub the mess out of the coat as best I can, it may need a trip to the dry cleaners.
"Morning." Harry brushes past me in the kitchen I go in for a kiss but dismissed. "Sorry about your coat." I hold it up. "Forget it." He sips some coffee. His hair unkempt, stubble growing, eyes bleary.
He takes a seat on the kitchen counter and All is taping her hands on her hight chair.
"Daddy."
Harry is totally oblivious. I disappear from the kitchen for a moment. I splash some water on my face, alerting myself another day is starting, here we go again. I gather myself quickly and return.
"Daddyyy." Ally shouts louder, Harry is totally oblivious as I observe from a distance.
"Mummyy." She calls for me. "WHAT ALLY?" She begins to cry, her red cheeks strained. "It's ok baby, were gonna go see cousin Lucas at the park." I pick her up.
I rub her back soothing her, glaring at Harry. This behaviour is quite frequent. "What?" He stands throwing his left over coffee in the sink, marching back up stairs.
It has been a year since Ally was born, and at first it was blissful, now its nothing but constant turbulent days and nights. I don't know what is up with Harry. After he got released from being question about beating Will he was fine and indulged in fatherhood. He and Ally have this connection I'll never understand, his protection over her is enchanting. Then we got married three months later it was intimate and amazing. About five months ago cracks began to show, I had put it down to work stress, but when he started sleeping in the guest room some night, my head itched.
I pack her bag for the park and set her up in the Rang Rover. We live in London I agreed to move here for Harry.
"Ready princess." I say through the top review mirror. Her eyes fixated looking out the window. I hate doing this alone, I need Harry to be here and be attentive. That person took that away from us and I intend to pay them a visit later tonight.
"Where's H today?" Louis asks me, sitting on a bench watching the kids play with El. "Under the weather." I lie.
"Still?" I look to my husbands best friend. Harry doesn't even speak to the boys as often anymore it pains me, his brothers we all want to be here for him but he won't let us in.
I watch my daughter, Lou and El's son Lucas in wonderment. "hang in thee Bells." Louis rubs my back. "I am trying more than you know." I whisper.
Harry and I have this space, unidentified space, my hope once was to close it. But each day I feel further away from him. I am always compromising, realising and promising. But I can't help but wonder will I be the first to drive away?
I miss Harry so much. I miss him as my husband the one I could tell anything to, I miss the intimacy most of all I miss him playing his role as the over protective father he once was.
"Ah oh." I gape my mouth, "your cheeky." I poke my daughters nose. I reach for a sponge and pray to the gods that I can get the mess out of Harry's gucci coat, our daughter loves to cause riots everywhere.
"Daddyyy." She grins, revealing her left dimple. I scrub the mess out of the coat as best I can, it may need a trip to the dry cleaners.
"Morning." Harry brushes past me in the kitchen I go in for a kiss but dismissed. "Sorry about your coat." I hold it up. "Forget it." He sips some coffee. His hair unkempt, stubble growing, eyes bleary.
He takes a seat on the kitchen counter and All is taping her hands on her hight chair.
"Daddy."
Harry is totally oblivious. I disappear from the kitchen for a moment. I splash some water on my face, alerting myself another day is starting, here we go again. I gather myself quickly and return.
"Daddyyy." Ally shouts louder, Harry is totally oblivious as I observe from a distance.
"Mummyy." She calls for me. "WHAT ALLY?" She begins to cry, her red cheeks strained. "It's ok baby, were gonna go see cousin Lucas at the park." I pick her up.
I rub her back soothing her, glaring at Harry. This behaviour is quite frequent. "What?" He stands throwing his left over coffee in the sink, marching back up stairs.
It has been a year since Ally was born, and at first it was blissful, now its nothing but constant turbulent days and nights. I don't know what is up with Harry. After he got released from being question about beating Will he was fine and indulged in fatherhood. He and Ally have this connection I'll never understand, his protection over her is enchanting. Then we got married three months later it was intimate and amazing. About five months ago cracks began to show, I had put it down to work stress, but when he started sleeping in the guest room some night, my head itched.
I pack her bag for the park and set her up in the Rang Rover. We live in London I agreed to move here for Harry.
"Ready princess." I say through the top review mirror. Her eyes fixated looking out the window. I hate doing this alone, I need Harry to be here and be attentive. That person took that away from us and I intend to pay them a visit later tonight.
"Where's H today?" Louis asks me, sitting on a bench watching the kids play with El. "Under the weather." I lie.
"Still?" I look to my husbands best friend. Harry doesn't even speak to the boys as often anymore it pains me, his brothers we all want to be here for him but he won't let us in.
I watch my daughter, Lou and El's son Lucas in wonderment. "hang in thee Bells." Louis rubs my back. "I am trying more than you know." I whisper.
Harry and I have this space, unidentified space, my hope once was to close it. But each day I feel further away from him. I am always compromising, realising and promising. But I can't help but wonder will I be the first to drive away?
I miss Harry so much. I miss him as my husband the one I could tell anything to, I miss the intimacy most of all I miss him playing his role as the over protective father he once was.
They are reconnecting. That's good.
8/18/17