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New Year’s Eve, 2013

“I’m quite nervous,” Kit confessed to Kevin, sounding sheepish as they walked down the sidewalk after getting off the tube, his feet walking a couple of steps in front of Kit. They rarely walked side-by-side. “Do I look alright?” she asked him, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. She hadn’t been able to make a salon appointment, but Charlotte had helped her with an up-do that kept most of Kit’s unmanageable hair tethered. She was happy with how it turned out, but wanted Kevin’s approval as well.

Kevin exhaled loudly, holding his hand up to shush Kit, indicating that he was on the phone. She whispered an apology to him, her head drooping slightly as he kept his phone pressed against his ear. After a moment, he chuckled to himself, dropping his phone back into his pocket and making no motion to mention any details of the phone call to Kit.

“Who was that?” she questioned hesitantly after a few silent moments had passed between them. Kevin was in a surly mood and Kit didn’t want to upset him more, but her curiosity always got the best of her.

Kevin sighed again, sounding exasperated by Kit’s question. “Davey,” he answered. A few more moments passed before he continued. “His parents are having people at theirs later, so we’ll go there in a few.”

Kit’s jaw visibly dropped, and she was relieved Kevin was walking in front of her. “But… I thought we were going to be at this one for the night…” she said, struggling to keep the disappointment out of her voice. She didn’t know many of Kevin’s friends, but she’d met Davey a time or two. He was even older than Kevin and still lived at home with his parents. According to Kevin, Davey still received an allowance – the envy in Kevin’s voice when he told Kit the story was widely apparent.

Kevin scoffed and Kit could see the back of his head shake. “We’re not going to do everything you want to do all of the time, Kit,” he reminded her, as though she always got her way. In reality, Alexa’s party was one of the only things they’d done that she wanted to do since the inception of their relationship. “We’ll go round your friends for a bit, and then we’ll go see my friends. It’s not fair to expect me to be around people I don’t know all night long, you know,” he added, his voice sour.

“You’re right,” Kit answered automatically. She supposed he had a point – she rarely spent time with Kevin’s friends, but when she did, she hated it because she didn’t know them and they didn’t include her. She hadn’t thought about Kevin’s feelings about being in a similar predicament and not knowing a single person in the house they were about the step foot into. No wonder he was in such a mood – he abhorred when Kit didn’t consider his feelings.

“We won’t have to stay long,” she reluctantly added as they stopped in front of the house bearing the number Harry had texted her. A short, brick fence separated the terraced town house from the sidewalk, and a wrought-iron gate provided an entrance to the yard. She hesitated, feeling intrusive as she was faced with the task of opening the gate. With another exasperated sigh at Kit’s hesitation, Kevin thrust his arm between Kit and the gate and tugged on the handle. The gate swung open and he walked into the yard ahead of Kit, climbing the stairs to the front door.

Kit scrambled to catch up with Kevin, darting up the stairs and leaning on the doorbell before he could. She wanted to say something to him, to remind him to be well-behaved and polite, but feared his response. Keeping mum, she silently hoped he wouldn’t be a reckless jerk in a stranger’s home.

The door flew open moments later, and suddenly Kit and Kevin were facing Alexa Chung. Kit didn’t think she would be star-struck by anyone at the party – arguably the most famous guest was her childhood friend – but being face-to-face with a woman Kit grew up seeing on television and in magazines was a bit of a shock, though it was expected.

“Can I help you?”

Kit’s stomach fell. Did Harry forget to tell the host of the party that he invited two lowbrow crashers?
“Uhm… I’m Kit?” Kit told Alexa, her voice rising questioningly and her face feeling hot. Mortified, she wanted to turn and run down the street. “Harry’s friend? He said…”

“Oh!” Alexa interrupted, beaming at Kit and holding the door open further. “Of course! Come in, please,” she instructed, gesturing for Kit and Kevin to follow her inside. Relieved – and a bit guilty that her immediate thought was that Harry forgot about her – Kit stepped in behind Alexa, with Kevin trailing after her.

“This is Kevin,” Kit quickly informed Alexa, not wanting to hurt Kevin’s feelings by forgetting to introduce him. Kevin gave Alexa one of his best, most charming smiles and offered a hand to her.

“It’s an absolute pleasure to meet you,” Kevin told Alexa, his voice dripping with charisma. Kit pursed her lips together. Kevin could turn it on like a faucet, and could easily make people like him. Their appetite for him quickly dissipated as they got to know him, but Kit often wondered why he couldn’t be charming and enchanting all the time, or at least to her.

“You as well,” Alexa answered pleasantly as she shook Kevin’s extended hand. Kit watched the two of them, attempting to determine if their hands were joined for longer than cordially necessary. Of course, they were. Kevin was a flirt and Alexa was pretty. It was to be expected.

In the room just off the entry hall, Harry sat on the sofa in front of the bay window, next to Kendall as he impatiently waited for Alexa to bring the guests into the reception room. He struggled to hear the words spoken at the front door, but the conversation in the room proved too loud for him to eavesdrop. He shifted his position on the couch, fighting the urge to duck into the entry hall to see who had arrived, when Alexa stepped back into the reception room, Kit and a tall, striking man following behind her.

Seeing Kit caused Harry’s stomach to flip-flop, and for a moment, he completely forgot about the girl sitting to his right. Her hair was piled on top of her head, pulled away from her eyes and making her look older. Her outfit wasn’t quite as miraculous as the one she’d worn for the Christmas party, but the short, floral patterned A-line was fun, bold and a bit on the childish side… just like Kit. He stood up, immediately catching Kit’s eyes and being unable to resist beaming at her. She matched his smile, though she seemed a bit on edge as he took a few steps towards her.

“Hi, Kit-Kat,” he murmured to her, about to pull Kit into a hug when she thrust her hand towards him. Momentarily taken aback, he gave her a dumbfounded look. Only days prior, she’d shamelessly hugged him in the pub without a moment’s hesitation. Handshaking was not in her repertoire. It took Harry a few beats to realise Kit wouldn’t – or couldn’t – hug him with Kevin standing right behind her.

Harry took Kit’s hand in his own, feeling pins and needles the moment they touched. He smirked at her, gently tugging her closer to him and snaking his free arm around Kit’s waist. He didn’t want to disrespect Kevin, but if Harry wanted to hug his long-time friend, he was going to – though he tried not to focus on Kevin’s towering height and large, defined arms.

“Now, what are you going and shaking my hand for?” Harry said quietly into Kit’s ear, grinning as he felt her other arm timidly encircle his body. Feeling a gaze on him, Harry looked up and met Kevin’s eyes and a look that could kill. Not wanting to start anything with the man he’d never met, Harry pressed his lips together before grudgingly pulling away from Kit.

“Cause…” Kit managed to whisper back before Harry pulled away from her. She kept her hand enclosed around his for a moment longer before letting her hand drop to her side. The handshake was the last thing she wanted to do with Harry, but she knew Kevin would be angry with her if she initiated a hug. She was happy Harry saw through her façade, but she was more than a little worried about what Kevin’s reaction would be. She knew Kevin was never going to like Harry and judged him before speaking a single word to him, but the short-lived hug wouldn’t make it any better.

Feeling Kit’s apprehension from their embrace, Harry stepped away from her and turned his attention to Kevin. “Hi, I’m Harry,” he greeted, instructing himself to maintain eye contact with the behemoth of a man and not to appear intimidated as he extended his hand.

“Yeah,” Kevin answered with a snicker, ignoring Harry’s hand. Kit’s eyes widened at his audacious rudeness, but it wasn’t a complete surprise. While Kevin could turn on the charm for girls like Alexa, guys like Harry would not be on the receiving end of a similar greeting.

Jesus Christ, Harry thought to himself, but he made sure his reaction was not apparent on his face. He was a media trained professional; he could diffuse any situation that got off on the wrong foot. He really wasn’t a fan of this guy, but he couldn’t let it show. He turned on his heel, his extended hand turning into a gesture to the rest of the room.

“This is… Kendall and Ed… Nick, Pixie… And, of course, you’ve met our lovely hostess, Alexa,” Harry introduced, appearing completely unfazed by Kevin. “Everybody, this is one of my oldest friends in the world, Kit, and her boyfriend, Kevin.” He gestured to the couch perpendicular from the one he’d been sitting on. “Please, sit,” he instructed, clasping his hands behind his back. “What can we get you to drink?” he asked, insinuating that he and Alexa would share in the hosting duties for the moment.

“Scotch. Neat.” Kevin answered, his voice tight as he crossed the room to sit. Kit rolled her eyes before blinking several times in an attempt to hide her cheeky reaction. Kevin didn’t even like scotch, but he was under the impression that by drinking it, he appeared classy and cool. Kit knew it would take more than a drink order to make the room think he was classy or cool, but obediently, she kept her mouth shut.

“I’ll just have water, thank you,” Kit said to Alexa, offering her a smile that was a mixture of appreciation and apologetic. If Kevin was going to start in on the scotch, Kit knew she would be in charge of taking care of him before the night was over. It was easier to reason with a drunk man if she wasn’t a pissed up mess herself.

“Sure...” Alexa answered, her tone of voice telling Kit she was unconvinced that Kit didn’t want to partake in the New Year’s festivities. “We’ll be right back,” she promised, disappearing into the adjoining kitchen with Harry hot on her heels.

“Good lord,” Alexa immediately hissed as the door closed behind him. “Is he like the fucking Ice Princess or some shit? What’s his deal, anyway?”

Harry held his finger up to his lips, unnecessarily telling Alexa to keep her voice to a whisper. “I don’t know,” Harry answered, opening the fridge and grabbing out a bottle of water. “He gave me a pretty scary look when I was hugging Kit, anyway,” he told Alexa, tossing the bottle from one hand to the other as Alexa selected a bottle of scotch from the credenza.

“Yeah, I sort of thought he was going to kill you,” Alexa said, smothering a giggle. “He kept a pretty long grip on my hand there when they first came in. Felt bad, I didn’t want her thinking I’m going to snatch up her boyfriend, you know? I mean, she can have him,” added Alexa with a roll of her eyes.

Harry sighed. “I don’t even know why she wants him,” he answered dejectedly. He knew he had to keep his feelings in check around Kevin, but behind closed doors with one of his closest friends, he didn’t have to hide how he felt.

Alexa twisted the cap off the bottle. “Harry, why’d you even invite her here?” she questioned. “You’re not going to be able to make anything happen with her. You’re making yourself crazy, and you also brought Kendall… who seems nice,” she added with a shrug. “I know you’re smitten and all, and I’m sorry, but… Do you even really know her anymore? It’s been years…”

Harry rested his hands against the counter and leaned his head back, uttering another sigh. “I know,” he admitted, Alexa saying the same thing Harry had been thinking since he’d seen Kit at the pub. It had been years, and they didn’t have a romantic foundation from the past to continue to build upon. And yet, he couldn’t get her out of his mind.

“I just… really like her,” he confessed with a bashful smile. “I know it’s stupid… she’s with him, and…” He shrugged again. “She’s just the best person I know,” he told Alexa. “She doesn’t care what people think about her. She’s cheeky and funny… She’s got the cutest giggle I’ve ever heard. She’s real. I can’t see myself with someone like Kendall,” he added, his voice dropping even lower as he mentioned his date’s name. “She’s so boring, Lex. Of course, she’s nice but…” He trailed off, shaking his head.

Alexa was quiet, twirling the open bottle of scotch against the counter. “Then why… Oh, shit, this is the good stuff. Fuck that,” she said, recapping the scotch. “Then why did you invite Kendall?” Alexa continued, putting the bottle back in the cupboard and rifling through until she found a bottle of supermarket scotch.

“I… I mean…” Harry shrugged again, his head dropping. “It’s New Year’s. Better than nothing, right?”

Alexa exhaled, rolling her eyes. “Word of advice… Don’t say that to Kendall,” she told him, smiling sympathetically at her friend as she picked up the glass of scotch and turned to head back to the reception room.

“No shit,” Harry mumbled to himself, following Alexa. Kit and Kendall were sitting diagonally from one another, pleasantly conversing. The sight of the two girls chatting made him uneasy, though he didn’t know why. Nothing had happened with Kit, but even if it had, Kendall was a friend – barely – and nothing more. But as he walked towards the couch, he realised Kendall thought things differently.

“So, you guys are… together?” Harry heard Kit ask. He stopped short, pretending to be enthralled with the trim surrounding the door to the kitchen as he strained to hear Kendall’s response.

“I mean, yeah!” Kendall chirped, her words and voice concurrently irritating Harry through to his core. “We’ve gone out a couple of times, and he’s just wonderful!”

“Yeah…” Kit agreed slowly, catching Harry’s eyes across the room. She gazed at him, silently asking him why her, even though she knew it made sense. Kendall was a gorgeous model, a reality TV star and a massive celebrity. Someone like Harry had to date someone like Kendall. He couldn’t date the bug-eyed, scrawny college student from Cheshire. Celebrities dated celebrities; it was as simple as that.

“Here’s your water,” Harry said to Kit, reaching across the coffee table to hand her the bottle. He decided to pretend he hadn’t heard what Kendall had said. He would catch Kit alone later; he could explain the situation then. He needed Kit to know that he wasn’t about to cheat on Kendall on that tree stump under the moon – the thought of her thinking he was just like Kevin made him sick to his stomach.

“Thank you,” Kit replied, watching as Harry sat on the couch beside Kendall and wishing he was sitting beside her instead. “So, modelling… That must be a lot of fun,” Kit continued, though it didn’t sound fun to her at all.

“It’s amazing,” Kendall told her excitedly. “I mean, I get paid for playing dress-up and wearing incredible makeup! What girl wouldn’t want that, right?”

Kevin snorted. “This one, anyway,” he told her, jerking a thumb in Kit’s direction. “Getting her even to comb her hair is like pulling teeth. You’d think she’s a toddler, yeah,” he added, taking a sip of his scotch. “Macallan,” he determined incorrectly, examining the glass haughtily.

Hearing Kevin mock his girlfriend in front of an audience made Harry’s blood boil, and seeing Kit meekly sit beside her boyfriend, head down and appearing ashamed made his heart yearn for her. He didn’t like rudeness in any form, but when it was directed at the girl he was desperately sweet on, he didn’t think he could be any angrier.

He watched Kit, waiting hopefully for her rebuttal. The Kit he knew wouldn’t allow someone to speak to her like that, and she would have hardly let him utter the insult before retaliating with a put-down of her own. But this Kit kept her head down, a shade of red coating her cheeks as she uncomfortably picked at the label on her water bottle. The sight of the shamed little girl made Harry want to cry for her.

“Ahh, grooming’s overrated, isn’t it, Kit-Kat?” asked Harry after an uncomfortable pause, offering her a comforting smile as he repeated the words he said to her at the pub. She looked up at him and mimicked his smile, though hers didn’t reach her eyes. It took every ounce of his self-control to not jump across the couch and wrap Kit in his arms.

“She’s not a candy bar, mate,” Kevin told Harry, the word ‘mate’ used incredibly loosely. “She really doesn’t like that nickname.”

It wasn’t true. Kit didn’t mind the nickname; it was Kevin who didn’t like it. He tried unsuccessfully to get her family to quit calling her Kit-Kat, and even went so far as to text Timothy from Kit’s phone, demanding he stop. Tim knew it wasn’t Kit asking, and began using Kit-Kat exclusively in Kevin’s presence. Once Harry caught wind of the truth, it could be guaranteed he would do the same.

“Alright,” Harry replied tightly, the air in the room suddenly thick with tension. “I’m sorry, Kit,” he added, biting his tongue from adding ‘that your boyfriend is an worthless piece of shit’.

“It’s fine,” Kit assured him, casually running her fingers along her cheeks in an attempt to make the hotness disappear. She had never been more humiliated in her life. It wasn’t unusual for Kevin to make comments about Kit’s appearance – she’d come to get used to it, and to even expect it – but to do so in front of Harry, while Harry was with one of the prettiest girls Kit had ever seen, made Kit feel about two inches tall and as ugly as a troll.

“It could have been worse!” Kendall spoke up, seeming to try to break up the tension. “He could call you, like… Chunky or something! I mean, not that you are!” she quickly corrected, causing Kit to let out a quiet chuckle. Being even skinnier than Kendall, Kit knew chunky was not a word that would be used to describe her.

“I once had a lad call me Smartie,” Alexa added, picking up on what Kendall was doing and trying to get the room to lighten up and laugh.

“No, you didn’t,” Ed shot back teasingly, causing Alexa to fish an ice cube out of her drink and toss it in his direction.

A few more laughs erupted from around the room, and while the atmosphere began to segue back into party mode, it would take more than a few jokes about candy bars for Harry to relax. He was still worked up over Kevin’s comments, made evident by his clenched fist, and he wished he could think of a way to get Kit alone and shake some sense into her… and kiss her. Kevin or no Kevin, Harry suddenly determined that he was going to kiss Kit tonight.

~*~*~*~

As the night continued, the drinks kept flowing and the doorbell kept ringing. Before long, the small house was crowded with dozens of drunken Brits. As the temperature inside the house rose, most of the guests decided to make their way to the backyard.

“This is perfect,” Alexa determined, supervising as Ed and Harry struggled to maneuver the propane fire pit from the small garden shed. “See, and the tank just connects there, and then we won’t stink like a fire! Isn’t it great?”

“Fucking beautiful,” Ed grunted, stopping short in the middle of the stone patio. “This is good, yeah?” he asked Harry, dropping his side of the pit before Harry could answer.

“Oompf. Thanks, mate,” Harry replied, placing his end on the patio, careful not to damage the pit. He straightened up, looking around at the guests that were milling about. Kit and Kevin were still at the party, which was surprising. After humiliating Kit in front of the entire party, Kevin had spent the last hour in Alexa’s kitchen, guzzling back her scotch and feverously texting and calling his friends, trying to find something better to do. Evidently, he’d come up with nothing, because he was in the backyard, sitting on a bench next to Kit, thumbs still flying across his phone. Harry wondered if Kit would stay at Alexa’s if Kevin found a better party, but he knew she would obediently leave with Kevin.

“You having fun?” Harry asked Kit, pausing for a moment before sitting beside her on the bench, ensuring a respectful distance was between the two of them, though not wanting to.

Kit glanced towards Harry and nodded, feeling the familiar flicker of the butterflies in her stomach, butterflies that insisted on fluttering whenever Harry was close to her. “Yeah, it’s a good time,” she told him, wondering if she sounded at all convincing. She clasped her hands in her lap, the glow of Kevin’s cell phone bright against the dark night. No one else had their phones on them – it seemed to be an unspoken rule between the friends that they conversed with those around them, not those through the phone.

Harry nodded, keeping his eyes on Ed and his struggles to attach the propane tank to the fire pit. “Nice that it’s dry out, anyway,” he mused, mentally kicking himself for talking about the weather, but being unable to talk about what he really wanted to with Kevin sitting on the same bench.

“Definitely,” Kit answered, glancing up at Kevin as he sighed loudly, phone pressed to his ear. He shot Kit a disgusted look before standing up and sauntering towards the house. She bit her lip, watching as Kevin walked away. She felt a sense of relief as he left Harry and Kit alone on the bench – had he picked up on the vibes between the two of them, he never would have left Kit’s side.

Suddenly left alone with Kit, Harry was at a loss for words. He wanted to be in this situation all night, but now that she was beside him, with no one else within earshot, he didn’t know what to say to her. After a few moments had passed – moments that felt like hours – he finally spoke up.

“I’m not dating Kendall,” he blurted out, instantly regretting the boldness of his comment. He looked down at his interlocked hands, avoiding Kit’s eyes. He didn’t know what he expected her to say in response to his declaration. He knew what he wanted her to say, but she wouldn’t.

Kit was quiet; Harry’s sudden comment taking her by surprise. She looked down, her eyes cast upon his beautiful hands. “Why not?” she asked him, voicing the first question that came to mind. Guiltily, she realised she felt relieved that Harry wasn’t attached to the beautiful model.

“Because… she’s not the one for me,” Harry replied, tentatively nudging his elbow gently against Kit’s. “You know how that is, don’t you?” he asked quietly, almost pleading with her to agree with him. She had to know what it was like. There was no way she could be happy with a man like Kevin. Kevin didn’t appreciate her, Kevin didn’t respect her. Kevin had no idea how lucky he was to have her.

Kit looked towards the house, watching for Kevin to emerge again. She couldn’t bare her soul to Harry, not with the chance of Kevin returning from the house and overhearing her words. “No…” she instead answered, her voice almost inaudible. She wasn’t stupid; she knew Kevin could be nicer to her. But she also knew that she was loud, weird and likely more than a little annoying. Kevin put up with that… she didn’t think anyone else would.

Harry scoffed incredulously. “Really?” he asked rhetorically. He was aware he may be over-stepping his boundaries, but after seeing how Kevin treated Kit, he didn’t care. “Look me in the eyes and tell me you’re happy with him, then,” Harry challenged her, staring at Kit in an attempt to get her to look up at him.

Kit inhaled, aware as to how shaky her breath sounded. “Stop it,” she ordered, her voice sounding unnecessarily harsh as she kept her head down. Harry’s worry for her was incredibly endearing, but telling the truth about her lack of happiness made her feel like a pathetic child who couldn’t handle her own affairs. Her unhappiness was not a burden Harry needed. “It’s not your concern,” she added, knowing she couldn’t look at Harry and tell him she was happy with Kevin. “Just… stop,” she begged him.

Harry was quiet, fighting the urge to tuck Kit under his arm and kiss her hair, her cheek, her lips. If she thought she was doing a good job at convincing him that she was happy, she was wrong. “You deserve the world,” Harry told Kit, his voice quietly sad as Kevin approached the bench. Knowing he couldn’t be around Kevin and keep his opinions to himself, Harry stood up.

“Don’t forget that,” he advised her, reaching out and giving her shoulder a light squeeze, silently challenging Kevin. Luckily, Kevin was still glued to his phone and paid no attention to the touch between Harry and Kit. He glanced between Kit and Kevin a couple times before silently shaking his head at Kit. He hoped that she would realise how much she deserved before it was too late.

Notes