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Lavender & Roses

VII

I walked up to Niall's house nervously. Sadie was there too. I only knew that because I heard Sadie's voice in the background when Liam called. I didn't want Niall to catch onto the fact that I was going for it with Sadie when I told him I wouldn't. As I walked in the front door, I heard Sadie yelling in Gaelic and Niall shouting right back. I groaned quietly. Great. Not what I wanted to see. Suddenly, fear filled me. What if Niall had found out about our date? I entered the living room cautiously. I was shocked seeing Sadie breathing heavily and Niall beet red.
"You are being a fucking jerk!" Sadie shouted at Niall.
"How am I jerk? I asked you how you were doing! A simple question with a simple answer." Niall replied just as loudly as her.
Sadie glared at him, "No. No. No. You only ask me that when you think something is wrong. You only ask that when you want to start a fight about it."
"DeeDee, you look tired. I don't like it when you look this tired. Bad things happen when you look this tired." Niall seemed genuinely worried about Sadie. I shifted my gaze over to her. She didn't look well. Her eyes showed that she hadn't slept in a while: she had bags under her eyes and her eye lids looked a bit darker as well. Her hair wasn't as tame as it normally was, even though it was pulled into a ponytail. Her clothes weren't as on point as they had been. She wore joggers, a tank top and an over sized jumper. It looked as though she worn them a couple of days in a row.
"Niall. I am fine." Sadie snapped at him. I walked further into the room. Liam and Louis greeted me loudly, like they were hoping my presence would stop Sadie and Niall from fighting.
Niall sighed, "Hiya Harry."
"Hi Niall." I smiled weakly at him. "Hi Sade." I beamed at her, seeing if I could ease her anger. She just glared at me. I frowned then took a step back from her.
"Sadie Lynn, at least be fucking polite. He did drop you at home last weekend." Niall spat at her.
"Hello Mr Styles." Sadie greeted me coldly. I was instantly confused. Why was she acting this way toward me? It was only two nights ago that I had taken her home and we'd acted like we'd know each other for years. I let her feel the desire I was carrying for her just a little bit. What changed? Did she still want to go out with me? "You know what? I'm just going to go home. I don't have to listen to this. I am fucking grown." Sadie picked up her coat from the back of a chair then walked out. Niall groaned loudly then kicked the back of the small sofa. Without saying a word, I followed Sadie outside. I just wanted to make sure she was okay.
I took Sadie's hand in my gently when I caught up to her. She gazed back at me startled and little angry. She stopped trying to walk away and turned to me.
"What?" She snapped.
"I just wanna make sure that you're okay. I know how much you love Niall and I don't want you to be too upset about arguing with him." I replied sweetly. Sadie sighed heavily and nodded. "Is everything okay? Niall is kind of right. You look a bit under the weather."
Sadie grunted, "I'm fine." She spun away from me and headed for her car. I followed after her. I knew I was probably bothering her but I didn't really care. I wanted her to be okay.
"Are we still on for tomorrow?" I inquired as she climbed into her little red Audi. Sadie's eyes softened and she nodded with a bright smile. "Good. May I make a request though?" Sadie looked at me curiously. "Wear a dress." Sadie lifted her eyebrow. I chuckled, "Like a cocktail dress or something. Not asking for a ball gown."
Sadie nodded, "Okay. I can do that. So I'll see you at seven thirty tomorrow?" I quickly agreed to the plan. Without another word, Sadie pulled away.

I entered Niall's house again, this time it was silent. When I came back to the living room, Niall was glaring at me.
"Got her a little calmed down before she started driving." I informed Niall. Niall sighed and nodded. "She'll be fine, Niall. She sounded a lot better after she got out of the house." I stated casually. Liam and Louis gave me strange glances. "What?" I shrieked not liking all eyes on me.
"What are you doing, Harry?" Niall sounded angry.
"Helping a friend. She was obviously on your last nerve and you were on hers. I just made sure that she would make it home okay." I answered innocently. Niall and the other boys eyed me for a moment then went back to the conversation they had started before I got back.




I pulled up to the restaurant that I wanted to bring Sadie to. I made the reservation before she even said yes because the place was now really popular.
Sadie appeared worried as she said, "Oh Harry, this is too much. I would've been good with..."She tried to come up with a restaurant that wasn't as high end.
I shook my head, "I love this place though. They have amazing food and wine. You'll like it. I swear you will." She seemed nervous still. "It's actually quite relaxed inside. Don't worry." I assured her. She nodded and opened her door. "I'm supposed to do that for you, you know." I chuckled. Sadie rolled her eyes and stepped out of the car. I laughed and followed her actions. I handed my keys to the valet before taking Sadie's hand in my own when I reached the pathway. She blushed a little when I grasped her hand gently. "Do you not want me to hold your hand?" I asked her nervously.
She shook her head, "No. Um...it actually makes me feel better." I smiled slightly and tugged her hand. I led her into the restaurant. The hostess appeared shocked seeing me with Sadie but she greeted both of us politely. She led us to a table that was hidden away, where we wouldn't really be bothered by the rest of the guests. It was what I had requested because of Sadie's look of panic whenever there was a crowd. I wanted her to be comfortable. The more comfortable she was the more she would talk. I wanted her to speak to me.

Sadie eyed the menu with skeptical eyes. I was trying not to laugh as she made disgusted faces or 'that might be alright' faces. Watching her was intoxicating. There was something about her that made all of her actions so interesting. She had so many cute quirks, like tapping the table and the way she flipped the menu page back and forth a few times. I smiled brightly at Sadie when she looked up from her menu.
She blushed, "I don't know what to get." I moved closer to her in the booth to look at the menu with her. I sat close enough so that I could see but she moved even closer to me. I could feel her warmth radiating outward. I tried to control myself when I felt her arm touch the exposed part of my chest. She looked up at me with a small smile, "What do you think?" I licked my lips slowly as I gazed into her eyes. Sadie bit down on her bottom lip then dropped her eyes back to the menu. I did the same. We spent the next few minutes trying to find something for her. When she finally decided, she scooted away from me as quickly as she could. Not all the way across the booth, but far enough that we couldn't feel each other any more.

Sadie and I were waiting on our waiter to return when I decided to ask her the questions I'd been pondering on all week long. Questions that only puzzled me more after seeing her fight with Niall.
"Sadie?" I nearly whispered to her. She smiled brightly at me and hummed. "If I ask you some stuff, will you promise not to be upset with me?"
She lifted her eyebrow, "It depends on what you ask me."
"Why is Niall being so protective of you? He was very...anxious when I asked who you were and said that I enjoyed your company." I stated.
"Niall is the big brother I never had. We love each other very much." Sadie replied, but the answer didn't feel right.
"Sadie, can you please be honest with me? Niall came to my house to ask me not to see you. Eleven in the morning he...well, he didn't threaten me but I feel like it was half way there. He gets very angry when he sees me speaking to you." I was slightly annoyed. Neither Sadie or Niall had been giving me straight answers.
Sadie sighed, "He worries. He worries that relationships will end badly for me because I am...different. And relationships are kind of hard for me. He doesn't want me to have my feelings get hurt."
"The bad days?" I asked gently. Sadie nodded shyly. "Um, can I ask about your bad days? Why you have so many?" I saw fear in her eyes. "Please. I'm asking because I want us to be friends. I don't want your feelings to be hurt either. I think it would be easier if we were completely honest with each other." I said trying to persuade her into telling me.
"Uh...I'm...broken." She replied. "Well, my brain is anyway." She shrugged. I stared at her curiously. "I have a few illnesses that make dealing with people difficult." She was beating around the bush. I just wanted the truth.
"Sadie, just tell me." I commanded with a soft tone.
"I have multiple mental illnesses. Niall takes care of me and he's seen the worst of it. He's seen what I can do to others and myself and I guess he's worried about the what the effect would be." Sadie replied like she was ashamed.
"What do you have?" I was completely curious now.
"Um, when I was eight I was diagnosed with anxiety. At ten OCD, and at sixteen, bipolar disorder. I am a hot mess." She giggled but her eyes said she was ashamed of it. I smiled a little, things made a bit of sense to me now. Her sudden dislike of me, the tapping and turning pages. The need to switch seats, holding my hand and just being closer to me in public. The way she wrapped her arms around herself at the bar and at Niall's party. Her fear of the statue in the garden. "Why are you smiling? Mostly people don't smile when I tell them I am crazy." Sadie frowned a little.
I shook my head, "You're not crazy."
"Harry, by definition, yes I am. I'm not...it's honest. It's okay to say it." She responded.
"I'm not going to say you're crazy. I don't see what good that would do you. I adore you the way you are. It actually kind of makes me like you more. I think it's cute the way you tap your fingers on the table top and unlock and re-lock your doors. I think you're cute when you're shy. I like your tenacity on your "bad days". I'm guessing that's apart of your bipolar, yeah?" I inquired. Sadie nodded with a strange look on her face. "It's just a part of who you are. It doesn't define you completely. You shouldn't let it."
"But you've never seen the bad side. Not really. You've never seen what Niall deals with." She was almost protesting.
"Niall still loves you doesn't he?" I pointed out.
Sadie shrugged, "Sometimes I feel like I am more of a burden to him. He shouldn't have to take care of me the way that he does."
"Ah, but he does. Ergo, he loves you." I beamed at her. Sadie dropped her head and covered her face with both hands. "Sadie." I murmured. "Sadie." She finally looked up at me after a moment. Her eyes were red and she had a couple of tears rolling down her cheeks. I took her hand and moved closer to her. "I still want to get to know you. I wanna be friends...and stuff." I thought I was dropping another hint about wanting to be more than friends. "And I think that maybe, if you let me in, if you let me see the bad too, it will just make us better friends." I suggested. Sadie stared up at me with almost grateful eyes. "And maybe, it'll make you feel like you're not a burden to Niall. Even though I know he doesn't see it that way." Sadie pulled her bottom lip between her teeth then rested her forehead on my chest. Just then, we heard a throat clearing in front of us. Sadie sat up straight, her cheeks a fiery red.
"Were you two interested in dessert?" The waiter asked politely.
"Actually, no." I replied kindly. Sadie looked at me with a pouting lip. "I have a plan." I murmured to her with a grin. She nodded and sank back into the booth, leaning into me just slightly. The waiter smiled a bit and handed me the check. Sadie leaned over a bit to peek at the bill. "No." I chuckled moving it out of her sight.
"Harry." She whined softly.
"Nope. I asked you out. I don't have to tell you a damn thing about the bill." I laughed and pushed it toward the end of the table.
"I think you should let me look at it." Sadie began to bat her eyelashes at me.
I shook my head, "Not a chance." Sadie folded her arms over her chest and continued to pout.


"Harry, what are we doing here? It's December." Sadie asked as we pulled up to a little park with a frozen over pond. I smirked at her a bit as I stopped the car. "Harry?" She said my name nervously. I didn't respond; I just climbed out of the car after shutting the engine off. She watched me walk to the back of my Range Rover, still smirking. I opened the back of the car and moved things around, setting up the small surprise for her. Once it looked presentable enough for her, I rounded the passenger side. I opened her door with a bright smile. Sadie gazed at me like she was almost scared.
I held my hand out to her, "Come on. You'll like this." She placed her hand in mine still nervous about what I had planned. I helped her slide out of the car then pulled her to the back.
"Oh Harry!" She gasped. I had a small picnic set up in the back of the car. I put my hands on her hips then lifted her into the back. I grabbed the blanket from the back of the seat and wrapped it around her. "This place is absolutely beautiful. Like a picture. Or a scene from a movie." She beamed at me.
"You said you like being outside." I stated as I sat down next to her. "So I thought after being in a crowded and stuffy restaurant, this would be nice." I smiled at her. Sadie leaned forward and buried her face in my neck for a moment. She was obviously overwhelmed. After a moment, she lifted her head. She gazed into my eyes, chewing on her bottom lip, her cheeks bright pink. I wanted to steal a kiss. I cleared my throat and moved away from her slightly, "I have sweets too." The light in Sadie's eyes dimmed a bit. I grabbed the small platter next to us. I held it in front of her. "I kind of found a way to sneak this out of Niall, it's your favorite." I smiled once again. Sadie lifted her eyebrow and took the lid off. She gasped again and the light returned to her eyes.
"Seriously? You made mini Guinness cake?" She asked in disbelief. I nodded and pushed it at her. She carefully took it from my hands. I handed her a fork, still grinning. "Wait? Where's your fork?" She asked me before she took a bite.
I grabbed another platter, "I have my own cake. Niall said that you almost bit him the last time you guys had it."
Sadie giggled, "No. I did bite him. My Da made it for my birthday and Niall tried to take mine." I shook my head as I laughed. She leaned in, "But I'd share with you."
"Thanks but I thought this was easier given our venue." I motioned to the park and the fact we were in the boot of my car. She nodded and sat back from me a little. "Well, go on and try it." I chuckled. She lifted her eyebrow then dug into her cake. I smirked when her eyes closed and she sighed in delight. "Good?" I asked quietly.
She nodded as she opened her eyes, "Very. It's like eating my Da's cake." Sadie leaned forward, "But he makes his own frosting and sneaks whiskey in it so me Mum will pass out after dinner."
"I'll consider that next time." I laughed. Sadie went back to eating her cake. "So, Sadie," I felt a little nervous about speaking to her now. I wanted to ask her a million questions but I didn't want to overwhelm her in anyway.
"Harry." She giggled.
"I don't know." I blushed.
Sadie smiled, "Tell me about your mum and sister. You seem to love them very much. I mean, you've got multiple tattoos for them."
"Well, my mum is a saint. First of all." I informed Sadie. She smiled and set her cake beside her. "She's probably the nicest, most loving woman on the planet. She's amazing." I told her with a bright smile.
"Mummy's boy." Sadie teased.
"Proud of it." I stuck my tongue out at her. "And Gemma, she's my best friend in reality. It's been hard, not seeing her all the time. She's probably one of the few people who really know me anymore." I stated with a furrowed brow. "Sorry." I cleared my throat again when I felt Sadie's hand on my thigh.
"I think I'd like her then." Sadie spoke with a soft and sweet voice. "Tell me about her. Really." Sadie urged me. I couldn't help but smile as I began telling her all about my sister.


"Well." Sadie blushed as we stood at the door to her flat. I nodded and pushed my hands into my pockets. "I'll see you later." Sadie stated but it sounded more like a question.
I nodded, "Yes. I will be at Niall's tomorrow, you know, if you were going to go there." I could see that Sadie was chewing the inside of her cheek. "I...uh...I'd like to do this again. I had fun with you." I said trying to shake off my own nerves.
Sadie agreed softly, "Yeah. I had fun too. That park was really beautiful."
"Yeah. I'll call you...tomorrow?" I could feel my hands trembling. Sadie nodded slowly. I leaned forward and kissed her forehead softly. She hummed and leaned into my lips, her hands on my chest. I backed away slowly, not really wanting to walk away from her. "Goodnight, Sadie."
She blushed and smiled, "Goodnight, Harry." I struggled to separate myself from her completely. I turned to walk toward the elevator after Sadie unlocked her door. As much as I wanted to stand there for a moment longer to see if she'd invite me in, I didn't. She needed me to take it slow. I couldn't just follow my hormones with her. I glanced back to her door when I reached the elevator to see that she wore a mega watt smile and was shaking her head, her cheeks a bright red. I chuckled and stepped onto the elevator, not daring to look toward her door again.

Notes




Okie dokie. *sighs heavily*
This is what I was talking about in the previous note. :) This story was honestly created as a coping mechanism for me. But Kal and Livy really liked it so here it is. With that being said, all of this that is going to come up, is my daily life (mostly), so I am going to keep it real. If you're not down, don't read it. This is personal for me. If you have any questions as we go on, feel free to ask, I don't mind. But I feel like the content within the chapters should give you all that you need. Like I said, this is personal for me, don't fill my comments with hate and negativity.

Peace&Love babies.

Comments

@Styles girl 4eva
❤️

morrison_hotel morrison_hotel
9/24/18

Ahhhh I’m so happy !!! I can’t wait for more updates xo I’m so glad you’re back!

@JasperRenee
Yay! It makes me happy to know that you still like these stories and actually care. ❤️

morrison_hotel morrison_hotel
9/22/18

@morrison_hotel
I always do!

JasperRenee JasperRenee
9/22/18

@JasperRenee
Thanks lovely girl. ❤️ I hope you liked it

morrison_hotel morrison_hotel
9/22/18