Ruined Just By A Smile
My families problems?
The session starts off well, he asks a few questions, nothing interesting but he noted all of my answers down. Half way through it started to go down hill, he asked questions about my siblings, knowing fullwell we had family problems when they were younger, which effected Aviana's confidence as she grow up. She learnt from my mistakes not her own as did Dixon. He started to take things to extreme and pushing me over the top. I tremble in fear, dreading the questions on my family life altogether. After what felt like hours of crying and sharing my emotions, I pull myself together and stand up calmly.
"Remi, I want you to come back whenever you can. I know what your going though, and it's always easier when someone's by your side to help you along the way." Hayden states looking down at my records, a swarm of annoyance flows though my body, so many things I wasn't allowed to say that would eventually slip out and i had the urge to just yell at him, but I kept myself calm and replied
"I'll my best" I tick in shirt and walk out hand tightly clasped around my bag. As soon as I am out of the building I lean against the wall and break down in tears. I tried to bring myself round to fact that Hayden thought he knew what i was going though. He had no clue! No body does, he doesn't know because he wouldn't understand. He would do exactly the same as any other therapist or nurse who have tried to 'help' in the past. He'd take pity on me and judge my family, and eventually get the police involved. Every time its happened and every time I've been the one who takes the fall not my family. If it same event occurs again, father will kill me, and I'm not prepared to let it happen. Im staying out of the way of anything that looks dodgy, or a bad thing to get myself involved in.
I run into the nearest shop, my sight blurry from the tears still falling. I frantically search for a restroom, walking quickly around the eisles. I see a door labeled 'Ladies' and I run towards it carefully moving around the people in front of me. I swing the door open and sprint over to the mirrors, whipping a makeup wipe out of my bag. I scrub at the run mascara marks on my bag and then take a new one rubbing the rest of my makeup off. I rumble around in my bag for my mascara, eyeliner and blusher. Once I found them I apply them quickly and put them away. I take a deep breath and walk out as if nothing had happened.
I look at my watch, 12:47. I was meant to be going to school, my first day but with only 3 hours to go till it finished I decide to skip it and tell my parents the session over ran. I find a bus stop and wait for the next bus. An hour later the bus finally turns up, completely exhausted I climb on and buy a ticket. I stroll all the way to the back and slump myself down. I yank my earphones out of my bag and plug them into my phone, putting the volume on full blast. Music was my favourite way to calm myself down and focus on things. I close my eyes and start focus on thing that I had to remember like what time the school started and where I had to be in the morning. I finally end up at the bus stop at the top of my road. I jump off and throw my hood up to hide my face and take a slow walk back down to my old battered home. It wasn't the nicest place we've lived, my father did promise he'd move us further out if he feels the need to. But we all know he eventually will, he'll get sick of the house and moves us to some fancy neighbourhood like every other time. I come in quietly and head straight upstairs, I scan my room for a pair of pyjamas and throw them on. I lay down gently on the end of my bed, my legs hanging over the edge. My mind replays everything that happened today, but no matter how hard I tried I could not get the mysterious jogger out of my head. He was stuck there like a tattoo...
"Remi, I want you to come back whenever you can. I know what your going though, and it's always easier when someone's by your side to help you along the way." Hayden states looking down at my records, a swarm of annoyance flows though my body, so many things I wasn't allowed to say that would eventually slip out and i had the urge to just yell at him, but I kept myself calm and replied
"I'll my best" I tick in shirt and walk out hand tightly clasped around my bag. As soon as I am out of the building I lean against the wall and break down in tears. I tried to bring myself round to fact that Hayden thought he knew what i was going though. He had no clue! No body does, he doesn't know because he wouldn't understand. He would do exactly the same as any other therapist or nurse who have tried to 'help' in the past. He'd take pity on me and judge my family, and eventually get the police involved. Every time its happened and every time I've been the one who takes the fall not my family. If it same event occurs again, father will kill me, and I'm not prepared to let it happen. Im staying out of the way of anything that looks dodgy, or a bad thing to get myself involved in.
I run into the nearest shop, my sight blurry from the tears still falling. I frantically search for a restroom, walking quickly around the eisles. I see a door labeled 'Ladies' and I run towards it carefully moving around the people in front of me. I swing the door open and sprint over to the mirrors, whipping a makeup wipe out of my bag. I scrub at the run mascara marks on my bag and then take a new one rubbing the rest of my makeup off. I rumble around in my bag for my mascara, eyeliner and blusher. Once I found them I apply them quickly and put them away. I take a deep breath and walk out as if nothing had happened.
I look at my watch, 12:47. I was meant to be going to school, my first day but with only 3 hours to go till it finished I decide to skip it and tell my parents the session over ran. I find a bus stop and wait for the next bus. An hour later the bus finally turns up, completely exhausted I climb on and buy a ticket. I stroll all the way to the back and slump myself down. I yank my earphones out of my bag and plug them into my phone, putting the volume on full blast. Music was my favourite way to calm myself down and focus on things. I close my eyes and start focus on thing that I had to remember like what time the school started and where I had to be in the morning. I finally end up at the bus stop at the top of my road. I jump off and throw my hood up to hide my face and take a slow walk back down to my old battered home. It wasn't the nicest place we've lived, my father did promise he'd move us further out if he feels the need to. But we all know he eventually will, he'll get sick of the house and moves us to some fancy neighbourhood like every other time. I come in quietly and head straight upstairs, I scan my room for a pair of pyjamas and throw them on. I lay down gently on the end of my bed, my legs hanging over the edge. My mind replays everything that happened today, but no matter how hard I tried I could not get the mysterious jogger out of my head. He was stuck there like a tattoo...
