Always
Judges’ Houses: Part 3
Kaylie’s POV
Sunday, 21st August
I couldn’t believe Harry Styles and Niall Horan were sitting in the room across from me. Two members of my favourite band were so close to me, it was completely crazy. I was down on the floor section when I saw the boys in concert and I thought that was the closest I would ever be to them. But I was wrong.
Niall had given me a big hug when I introduced myself to him. Surprisingly, I was actually quite calm although on the inside, I was screaming. And I knew it was written all over my face. I caught Harry smiling at me when Niall complimented me on the performances he had seen of me. He’s enjoying this… I had thought.
The girls and I had been waiting in one of the sitting rooms in Harry’s house for about 10 minutes when one of the female crew members, Jayla, came in, looking right at me.
“Harry and Niall are ready for you, Kaylie.”
I’m first? Oh, OK, the pressure’s on! I took a deep breath and felt Alicia’s fingers briefly squeeze mine in reassurance. She whispered “Good luck” to me as I stood up, following Jayla out of the room.
My heart was pounding and the nerves were coursing through my veins like fire. Cameras were everywhere, documenting this part of the competition for the viewers at home to watch on their TVs. I was handed a microphone and took a deep breath once again, trying to calm my racing heart. Jayla gestured to the open door with her left hand and I walked in, the sound of my footsteps echoing off of the floorboards.
“Hello, Kaylie.”
There it was. There he was. That perfect English drawl that made my heart melt. He looked drop dead gorgeous in his green floral button-down and black skinny jeans, his right arm thrown around the back of the couch. Niall sat next to Harry on the plush leather, his blue eyes shining with friendliness. Seeing Harry for the first time was amazing enough for me. To have met Niall as well…it was unbelievable. I was under the full attention of two men that millions of girls around the world drooled over. So many people would kill to be in my position, to have Harry and Niall look at them. Butterflies flew around in my stomach as I stopped on the soft carpet, about a foot or two away from the two attractive men.
“Hi.” I said, not needing to use the microphone just yet.
“So tell us, how’s life been since you came on the show?” Harry asked. Well, where to start? I thought for a moment before answering.
“Uh…everyone at school knows who I am so that’s a little strange.” I said, making both Harry and Niall smile. Boy, their smiles were beautiful! So full of genuine joy and happiness.
“I’ve still continued with my studies because this is my final year and I want to do well. But I love being here and being in the presence of both of you, it really is a privilege.” I finished, wrapping my fingers around the microphone.
“Thank you.” Niall grinned and leaned back, his hands resting in his lap.
“You ready to start?” Harry questioned. I nodded and they wished me “Good luck”. I looked at the flowers printed on the carpet as the beginning of the song started. I closed my eyes as I ran the lyrics through my head, hoping I would stay in tune the entire time. I raised the microphone to my lips when I noticed it was my time to sing.
“Dreams are like angels
They keep bad at bay.
Love is the light
Scaring darkness away.
I'm so in love with you.
Make love your goal.”
My heart burned as I resonated with the lyrics. Dreams really were angels, they kept my nightmares away. I still dreamt of my beloved grandmother. I missed her every day. I wished she was here right now. I wished she could see where I was and cheer me on like the rest of my family. But she wasn’t. She was up in heaven, watching me, looking down on me and telling me how proud she was of me already.
“The power of love.
A force from above
Cleaning my soul.
Flame on burn desire.
Love with tongues of fire
Purge the soul
Make love your goal.”
My grandmother had all the love in the world to give. She had been the most loving woman. I remembered the warmth of her hugs, the sweetness of her kisses, the sparkle of her eyes. I missed everything about her. She and I were so alike. I had spent almost every weekend with her and I wished we could still do that. But she was snatched away from me and I couldn’t get her back. From where she was now, I know she still loved me and I still loved her. She was always with me, wherever I went, I carried her in my youthful heart.
“This time we go sublime.
Lovers entwined divine, divine.
Love is danger, love is pleasure.
Love is pure, the only treasure.
I'm so in love with you.
Make love your goal."
I started to get emotional, tears springing in my eyes. I remembered this song when it was played at my grandmother’s funeral. It had been one of her favourite songs to listen to if she needed a good cry and reminisce about the love she and her husband (my late grandfather) had shared over a period of 60 years. My grandmother had taught me the meaning of love and how powerful love could be. But love was also the most dangerous emotion. When a loved one passed away, you felt grief and pain and loss. That’s what love did but it also brought joy and happiness. I longed to love someone the way my grandmother loved my grandmother. So fully and unconditionally, with so much delight and passion.
My watery eyes latched onto the two members of One Direction, their gazes completely locked to me. They were enraptured with my performance, I could tell, and that made me more confident. The music swelled and I repeated the chorus once again.
“The power of love
A force from above
Cleaning my soul.
The power of love.
A force from above.
A sky scraping dove.”
I hit the last note perfectly, closing my eyes as I did so, laying my right hand over my heart while the fingers of my left hand held onto the microphone, keeping it against my mouth.
“Flame on burn desire.
Love with tongues of fire
Purge the soul
Make love your goal.”
My voice faded out slowly and I opened my eyes to see Harry staring right at me, his green eyes piercing my soul. He fiddled with his rings every now and then, adjusting their places on his long slender fingers. Niall had leant forward a little, his palms pressed together, as he watched me intently. I took a single breath before delivering the last line softly.
“Make love your goal.”
I was done. I had gotten my chance and I couldn’t redo anything. I stood there, in the middle of complete silence, wiping my eyes with my fingertips. I hoped my grandmother had watched me today and was telling me how much she loved me, and how much she appreciated me singing a song that was dear to her heart.
“That song is personal to you?” Niall asked.
“Yeah, sorry.” I nodded, rubbing the inner corners of my eyes with my fingers. Crap, I’m crying in front of them! And I’m being filmed… The whole nation is going to see this… They’ll think I’m weak… But I couldn’t stop my feelings. I hadn’t just done this performance for myself. I hadn’t entered the competition just for my benefit. I had done it for my family, both living and dead. They believed I should show my talent instead of keeping it hidden. Right now, I realised they were right. Otherwise, I never would have met Alicia or Skye or Jenna. I never would have met Harry and Niall. Thank you.
“It’s OK.” Niall reassured me. He was so nice and sweet, I didn’t deserve his sympathy. I got my composure back and looked at the two of them confidently, my eyes still shiny from my tears.
“Is there a story behind why that song is personal to you?” Harry asked me gently. He obviously knew it was a tender topic for me to talk about and he took that into consideration, which I found so kind. He is too caring for his own good. I think he didn’t realise how much that meant to me.
“Um…my grandmother passed away about a year ago and…this s-s-song was one of her favourites and it reminded her of her life with her husband. I chose the song because I know she’s…l-l-looking down on m-m-me, saying “Thank you” for singing this song. So this performance was for my grandmother.”
I had choked on some of my words but I couldn’t exactly avoid it. My grandmother had been a huge light in my life. She was one of those stars that shone bright in the sky when I visited her and told her about my terrible day at school because of being bullied. Allison still taunted me about my grandmother’s death, which I found completely disrespectful. I had fought back and called her a bitch one time and unfortunately, it was my arse that got into trouble. But I didn’t regret it. She was a bitch, taking advantage of my grandmother’s passing to put me down. Allison was jealous now, because everyone congratulated me on my talent and were asking me what it’s like talking with Harry and all that. Both Vanessa and Marcus had asked me what he smelt like. They assumed sex, which was entirely true, but his cologne gave off a whiff of sweet cinnamon which was intoxicating. They were weirdly jealous and happy for me at the same time.
I came back to reality and saw the mournful looks on Niall and Harry’s faces. They generally looked sorry for me, I could tell by the look in their beautiful eyes.
“I’m so sorry for your loss, Kaylie. And that was a beautiful emotional performance.” Harry said and Niall nodded in agreement. If they’re this sympathetic and kind, I wonder what Liam and Louis are like. Probably just as kind. I thought. I breathed deeply, feeling my heartbeat increase a little bit because of all the emotion.
“Thank you, love.” Harry spoke again, indicating that it was my time to go. I thanked them and left the room, handing the microphone back to Jayla. A camera waited for me and one of the camera guys asked me what I thought about my performance. I answered calmly, not wanting to burst into tears like a child.
“I poured everything I had into that performance. I laid my heart out for them to see and I did it for my grandmother. I just hope it was enough.”
I turned away from the camera and fled past the room the other girls were in. I stepped out of the front doors of the house and collapsed down onto the steps, stretching my bare legs out in front of me. I finally let the tears fall completely, sobbing into my hands. I just wanted to cry in private, let everything out that I had held in during my performance.
It was far by the hardest and most emotional performance I had done. I didn’t know if I could do that again with another personal song, especially during the live shows, if I make it through. It was all so much. But whatever would happen, the true thing I cared about was making my grandmother happy and proud up in heaven.
Remember, you’ll always be my little diamond.
I heard her friendly voice in my head. She had told me that two days before she took her final breath of life. I was her little diamond and I always would be. I looked up at the clear blue sky, my eyes still glittering with warm fresh tears.
“I love you, Grandma.” I whispered to myself.
(Just imagine him with the glasses)
Sunday, 21st August
I couldn’t believe Harry Styles and Niall Horan were sitting in the room across from me. Two members of my favourite band were so close to me, it was completely crazy. I was down on the floor section when I saw the boys in concert and I thought that was the closest I would ever be to them. But I was wrong.
Niall had given me a big hug when I introduced myself to him. Surprisingly, I was actually quite calm although on the inside, I was screaming. And I knew it was written all over my face. I caught Harry smiling at me when Niall complimented me on the performances he had seen of me. He’s enjoying this… I had thought.
The girls and I had been waiting in one of the sitting rooms in Harry’s house for about 10 minutes when one of the female crew members, Jayla, came in, looking right at me.
“Harry and Niall are ready for you, Kaylie.”
I’m first? Oh, OK, the pressure’s on! I took a deep breath and felt Alicia’s fingers briefly squeeze mine in reassurance. She whispered “Good luck” to me as I stood up, following Jayla out of the room.
My heart was pounding and the nerves were coursing through my veins like fire. Cameras were everywhere, documenting this part of the competition for the viewers at home to watch on their TVs. I was handed a microphone and took a deep breath once again, trying to calm my racing heart. Jayla gestured to the open door with her left hand and I walked in, the sound of my footsteps echoing off of the floorboards.
“Hello, Kaylie.”
There it was. There he was. That perfect English drawl that made my heart melt. He looked drop dead gorgeous in his green floral button-down and black skinny jeans, his right arm thrown around the back of the couch. Niall sat next to Harry on the plush leather, his blue eyes shining with friendliness. Seeing Harry for the first time was amazing enough for me. To have met Niall as well…it was unbelievable. I was under the full attention of two men that millions of girls around the world drooled over. So many people would kill to be in my position, to have Harry and Niall look at them. Butterflies flew around in my stomach as I stopped on the soft carpet, about a foot or two away from the two attractive men.
“Hi.” I said, not needing to use the microphone just yet.
“So tell us, how’s life been since you came on the show?” Harry asked. Well, where to start? I thought for a moment before answering.
“Uh…everyone at school knows who I am so that’s a little strange.” I said, making both Harry and Niall smile. Boy, their smiles were beautiful! So full of genuine joy and happiness.
“I’ve still continued with my studies because this is my final year and I want to do well. But I love being here and being in the presence of both of you, it really is a privilege.” I finished, wrapping my fingers around the microphone.
“Thank you.” Niall grinned and leaned back, his hands resting in his lap.
“You ready to start?” Harry questioned. I nodded and they wished me “Good luck”. I looked at the flowers printed on the carpet as the beginning of the song started. I closed my eyes as I ran the lyrics through my head, hoping I would stay in tune the entire time. I raised the microphone to my lips when I noticed it was my time to sing.
“Dreams are like angels
They keep bad at bay.
Love is the light
Scaring darkness away.
I'm so in love with you.
Make love your goal.”
My heart burned as I resonated with the lyrics. Dreams really were angels, they kept my nightmares away. I still dreamt of my beloved grandmother. I missed her every day. I wished she was here right now. I wished she could see where I was and cheer me on like the rest of my family. But she wasn’t. She was up in heaven, watching me, looking down on me and telling me how proud she was of me already.
“The power of love.
A force from above
Cleaning my soul.
Flame on burn desire.
Love with tongues of fire
Purge the soul
Make love your goal.”
My grandmother had all the love in the world to give. She had been the most loving woman. I remembered the warmth of her hugs, the sweetness of her kisses, the sparkle of her eyes. I missed everything about her. She and I were so alike. I had spent almost every weekend with her and I wished we could still do that. But she was snatched away from me and I couldn’t get her back. From where she was now, I know she still loved me and I still loved her. She was always with me, wherever I went, I carried her in my youthful heart.
“This time we go sublime.
Lovers entwined divine, divine.
Love is danger, love is pleasure.
Love is pure, the only treasure.
I'm so in love with you.
Make love your goal."
I started to get emotional, tears springing in my eyes. I remembered this song when it was played at my grandmother’s funeral. It had been one of her favourite songs to listen to if she needed a good cry and reminisce about the love she and her husband (my late grandfather) had shared over a period of 60 years. My grandmother had taught me the meaning of love and how powerful love could be. But love was also the most dangerous emotion. When a loved one passed away, you felt grief and pain and loss. That’s what love did but it also brought joy and happiness. I longed to love someone the way my grandmother loved my grandmother. So fully and unconditionally, with so much delight and passion.
My watery eyes latched onto the two members of One Direction, their gazes completely locked to me. They were enraptured with my performance, I could tell, and that made me more confident. The music swelled and I repeated the chorus once again.
“The power of love
A force from above
Cleaning my soul.
The power of love.
A force from above.
A sky scraping dove.”
I hit the last note perfectly, closing my eyes as I did so, laying my right hand over my heart while the fingers of my left hand held onto the microphone, keeping it against my mouth.
“Flame on burn desire.
Love with tongues of fire
Purge the soul
Make love your goal.”
My voice faded out slowly and I opened my eyes to see Harry staring right at me, his green eyes piercing my soul. He fiddled with his rings every now and then, adjusting their places on his long slender fingers. Niall had leant forward a little, his palms pressed together, as he watched me intently. I took a single breath before delivering the last line softly.
“Make love your goal.”
I was done. I had gotten my chance and I couldn’t redo anything. I stood there, in the middle of complete silence, wiping my eyes with my fingertips. I hoped my grandmother had watched me today and was telling me how much she loved me, and how much she appreciated me singing a song that was dear to her heart.
“That song is personal to you?” Niall asked.
“Yeah, sorry.” I nodded, rubbing the inner corners of my eyes with my fingers. Crap, I’m crying in front of them! And I’m being filmed… The whole nation is going to see this… They’ll think I’m weak… But I couldn’t stop my feelings. I hadn’t just done this performance for myself. I hadn’t entered the competition just for my benefit. I had done it for my family, both living and dead. They believed I should show my talent instead of keeping it hidden. Right now, I realised they were right. Otherwise, I never would have met Alicia or Skye or Jenna. I never would have met Harry and Niall. Thank you.
“It’s OK.” Niall reassured me. He was so nice and sweet, I didn’t deserve his sympathy. I got my composure back and looked at the two of them confidently, my eyes still shiny from my tears.
“Is there a story behind why that song is personal to you?” Harry asked me gently. He obviously knew it was a tender topic for me to talk about and he took that into consideration, which I found so kind. He is too caring for his own good. I think he didn’t realise how much that meant to me.
“Um…my grandmother passed away about a year ago and…this s-s-song was one of her favourites and it reminded her of her life with her husband. I chose the song because I know she’s…l-l-looking down on m-m-me, saying “Thank you” for singing this song. So this performance was for my grandmother.”
I had choked on some of my words but I couldn’t exactly avoid it. My grandmother had been a huge light in my life. She was one of those stars that shone bright in the sky when I visited her and told her about my terrible day at school because of being bullied. Allison still taunted me about my grandmother’s death, which I found completely disrespectful. I had fought back and called her a bitch one time and unfortunately, it was my arse that got into trouble. But I didn’t regret it. She was a bitch, taking advantage of my grandmother’s passing to put me down. Allison was jealous now, because everyone congratulated me on my talent and were asking me what it’s like talking with Harry and all that. Both Vanessa and Marcus had asked me what he smelt like. They assumed sex, which was entirely true, but his cologne gave off a whiff of sweet cinnamon which was intoxicating. They were weirdly jealous and happy for me at the same time.
I came back to reality and saw the mournful looks on Niall and Harry’s faces. They generally looked sorry for me, I could tell by the look in their beautiful eyes.
“I’m so sorry for your loss, Kaylie. And that was a beautiful emotional performance.” Harry said and Niall nodded in agreement. If they’re this sympathetic and kind, I wonder what Liam and Louis are like. Probably just as kind. I thought. I breathed deeply, feeling my heartbeat increase a little bit because of all the emotion.
“Thank you, love.” Harry spoke again, indicating that it was my time to go. I thanked them and left the room, handing the microphone back to Jayla. A camera waited for me and one of the camera guys asked me what I thought about my performance. I answered calmly, not wanting to burst into tears like a child.
“I poured everything I had into that performance. I laid my heart out for them to see and I did it for my grandmother. I just hope it was enough.”
I turned away from the camera and fled past the room the other girls were in. I stepped out of the front doors of the house and collapsed down onto the steps, stretching my bare legs out in front of me. I finally let the tears fall completely, sobbing into my hands. I just wanted to cry in private, let everything out that I had held in during my performance.
It was far by the hardest and most emotional performance I had done. I didn’t know if I could do that again with another personal song, especially during the live shows, if I make it through. It was all so much. But whatever would happen, the true thing I cared about was making my grandmother happy and proud up in heaven.
Remember, you’ll always be my little diamond.
I heard her friendly voice in my head. She had told me that two days before she took her final breath of life. I was her little diamond and I always would be. I looked up at the clear blue sky, my eyes still glittering with warm fresh tears.
“I love you, Grandma.” I whispered to myself.
(Just imagine him with the glasses)
Notes
I updated earlier because...I’m done with university for the year! All done! I just submitted my final two essays so I’m all finished! *squeals with happiness* I don’t think I’m going back next year because my mind is just not built for university so that means more frequent updates for this story! Twice a week, maybe three if I’m feeling it :) Hope you enjoyed the chapter, you beautiful people!
blankspace1 xx
We’re dying for an update here. I love it. <3
11/19/17