Hanging up the phone was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I so badly wanted him to beg for me, and me end up caving in and forgiving him like the many other times before, but I couldn't let myself do that. Despite his numerous efforts of trying to fix this, I won't budge. The never ending phone calls, and story-length texts aren't going to fix anything. Our relationship is basically ruined. It's hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that it's really over. It took me days to leave the house, and even longer for me take my engagement ring off. I don't think he has quite come to terms with the fact that he is officially single yet, but the fans have. He has plenty of options so it's just a matter of time before he replaces me. Although the boys' tell me how devastated he is, I somehow find it hard to believe. If he cared about me so much he wouldn't have cheated on me in the first place. I hate thinking about it, thinking about him with someone else makes me sick. Now I know how he felt when that asshole kissed me at that party. My friends and family have been supportive, but never fail to constantly remind me "I told ya so." Yes, even I knew all along that Liam Payne was too good to be true. I just thought that maybe somehow, someway, we would get our happy ending. I guess everything happens for a reason. That's the only explanation I have for this unfourtunate fate that's been bestowed upon me. It's been weeks now, and I'm taking this break up better than expected. I'm not even bitter. Is that weird? Heartbroken maybe, but not bitter. I think I'm just so numb to everything. He hurt me so much that it's almost impossible to feel anything. I miss him. I really miss him, and of course I love him. I always will, but this is the first time in the course of the last 10 months, that I have done anything for myself. I need to take this grieving period to reflect on everything. Will we get back together in the future, I don't know. That's on him, only time will tell.