Only Ever You

“Im so sorry Miss Irwin” says the nurse whose name I can’t seem to remember “But our tests confirmed what we had already expected at approximately 9.00am this morning you had a miscarriage, again I am so sorry for your loss”

10 hours earlier
The first sign that something wrong was the kicking stopped, since a few days ago I had been feeling a soft kicking in my stomach, the thing was it didn’t feel like a nuisance, it felt reassuring knowing my baby was fine, now that i had got over my initial shock at finding out I was pregnant, I had been experiencing a kind of love I never had before, everyday I felt so at peace with everyone and everything.
At first I thought I was just being paranoid, like I usually was but when lunch came round and I felt so empty inside I immediately ran for my phone and called Luke “Um..Luke” I said “I dont know if I’m just going over the top but the baby hasn’t moved at all today and I’m getting kind of worried” “What!” Luke shouted so loudly I almost dropped the phone. “Ashley sit down, stay calm I’m on my way” he said in an extremely uncalm voice.
I sat down shaking, hardly believing this was happening. Tears crept down my face but I couldn’t be bothered to wipe them away, what was the point?
I could lose my unborn child today.


“No!” I screamed “No!” “Miss Irwin, please I know this is upsetting but please calm yourself your upsetting others on the ward” I honestly didn’t care, they deserved to feel as broken as I felt now. “Sir? Please come quickly” said the nurse rushing down the corridor and returning with Luke. His face was a pale grey and he didn’t even need to ask, he just sank down to where I was on the floor and wrapped his arms around me, together w shook and our gasping sobs filled the air.

A part of me died right there on the sparkling hospital floor. What was worse was the fact that with this baby of mine, there would be no funeral, no memories and no grieving people who had known her. “She was going to be called Grace” I sobbed into Luke’s jacket. He just held me and we stayed like that trapped in our unfair world of never ending misery.

There would never be a chance for my child in this world, everything I loved was snatched from me, not everything a small voice reminded me I still had Luke.

I vowed then I would never lose him.

Notes

Another sad chapter:(
I can't seem to stop writing them!

Im so sorry for not updating earlier! I had so many exams I promise I will update more!

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