ALWAYS

I sat in the corner of the room and watched Darcy playing with her friend. Enola sat a little closer, her camera in hand. She felt the need to take a ton of photos of Darcy and her friend Sara. I just liked watching Darcy play. I rested my head on my fist letting my eyes follow the movement of the giggling little girls. Darcy was showing Sara how to use one of the toys she had brought. Sara was a good two years old than Darcy but they didn't seem to mind the age difference. Sara had been reading to Darcy and Darcy had drawn pictures for her.
Enola slid into the chair beside me slowly. I smiled at her and rested my hand on her back. I gently caressed her back the way I did when we would hang out in the dressing rooms while I was touring. Enola blushed and her eyes dropped to the floor. She began speaking to Sara's mother again after a moment. They talked about Sara's health this week. Enola's phone began ringing loudly. She pulled it from her purse and frowned.
"I'll be back. Sorry." She spoke to Sara's mother gently. Jill nodded and let Enola stand. "Hey Louis." Enola sighed into the phone as she left the room. I watched her closely as she stepped outside and closed the door behind her. Jill scooted into Enola's chair with a smile. I smiled back at her in a friendly manner.
"She talks about you a lot, you know." Jill stated. I lifted my eyebrow at her. "She doesn't say your name or anything. But watching you with her, I know it's you she talked about."
"I'm so confused." I laughed, feeling a bit embarrassed.
"You're the one that E met in Ireland, then whisked her off to Italy?" Jill inquired. I nodded with a grin. I loved those trips. "She talks about that a lot. She said those were some of the greatest times of her life. Darcy being the absolute best." I chuckled, knowing Darcy came first. "She still loves you I think. She also never says that but the way she usually is and the way she is with you here just today...a different person. Never seen her smile so much." Jill stated. I looked out into the hall to see that Enola looked stressed as she spoke to Louis. She had her hand in her hair and was pulling just a bit. Her eyes were red like she was about to cry.
"Ah, well, I'm told that Darcy and I are quite the comedians when we're together." I laughed. I was trying not to focus on Enola. If I was worried about her, I would forget about the woman sitting next to me that probably needed adult conversation.
Jill giggled, "You two are quite hilarious. Are you her dad?"
I frowned and shook my head, "No. I'm not." Jill seemed a bit confused. "She probably doesn't talk about Darcy's dad because..." I trailed off to pick my words wisely. The two little girls on the bed would repeat almost anything. "Her ex-husband is a piece of work."
Jill frowned and muttered, "That's a shame. I understand though. Sara's dad is the same." Jill leaned over a whispered, "I think she wishes you were." Jill quickly sat up straight when Enola opened the hospital room door.
"Hey. I'm going to go down and see if I can get Freddie in as a patient with Darcy's pediatrician. Will you take care of her?" Enola requested.
I stared at her like she had lost her mind, "Of course."
Enola turned to Darcy, "Darc, you listen to Harry, do you understand me?" Darcy nodded. "I mean it. You better behave or Harry isn't going to stay for dinner. He doesn't dine with naughty little girls." Enola threatened. Darcy looked at me with fearful eyes.
"You better listen to Mummy." I stated trying not to laugh.
"Okay Mummy. I'll be good!" Darcy shouted. Enola winked at me after a moment then walked out of the room again.


"Noli." I murmured when I noticed that Darcy had finally fallen asleep in her car seat. Enola hummed and looked over at me. "Why did you look so upset when you were on the phone with Louis?" I asked gently. I didn't want her to get mad at me.
"I wasn't upset. I was just paying attention. He's going to have Freddie for a long while when you guys are on your next break. I was trying to get Freddie into Darcy's pediatrician." Enola replied quietly. I gave her the look that told her I knew she was lying. "Okay, so we discussed something else as well but it's really not important, okay?" Enola sighed softly. She appeared to be nervous now.
"Noli, you can talk to me too, you know. I'm not going to tell anyone what you tell me, okay? Same as before. What we talk about when we're alone stays between us." I assured her.
"We're not exactly alone." Enola replied, glancing into the backseat. I turned a little to see the sleeping child in the back of my car. "She may not understand what we talk about but she will certainly repeat it if given the chance." Enola explained quietly.
"I know but the times when she's napping or playing in another room, if you need to talk about something, anything, you can tell me." I reached over and took her hand gently. I stroked her knuckles with my thumb, the way I always did before. Enola leaned her head back against the headrest. She gripped my hand a bit tighter.
"Are you staying for dinner tonight?" She asked quietly, completely ignoring what I had said to her. I just nodded. I knew that she couldn't handle talking about anything at the moment from the look in her eyes. "Good. Darcy likes having you at the house." Enola smiled and placed her other hand over mine. She gently ran her fingers over my hand, tracing every bone and knuckle. I smiled a little. She was warming up to me again.


I sat quietly on the sofa with Enola. Darcy was in her room napping. The few moments she was awake while Enola and I brought her into the house were amusing. She had demanded that I stay even while she slept. Her demands were simple but they meant the world. Although, it was a little more than uncomfortable as Enola and I stared at the television sitting as far apart as possible.
"Harry." Enola nearly whispered. I turned to her with a small smile. "You know you don't have to stay. She's three. She's not in charge. If you don't want to be here right now."
I shook my head, "There isn't anywhere else I want to be." Enola blushed a bit and turned her face back to the television. "Enola." She looked at me again. "Do you want me to leave?" I inquired quietly.
"No." She answered, her skin flushing bright red again. "I feel better with you here." Enola mumbled. I pretended like I didn't hear her. "Do you want to watch something else? I really don't know why we're watching the damn pony show." She groaned quietly after a moment.
I laughed, "Whatever you change it to is fine, Noli." She nodded and started to flip through the channels slowly, seeing what was on every channel. Finally, she turned the television off.
"There's nothing worth watching." Enola grumbled as she threw the remote onto the coffee table. She pulled her feet up onto the sofa and turned to me. "What should we do?" Enola asked. She seemed a bit nervous.
"I've been told I'm quite the conversationalist." I smirked. Enola giggled and shook her head. "How's your mother. She didn't look too happy when she saw me at your opening."
"Oh my mother..." Enola began. "She's getting worse in her old age. I know that she and I were really close when you and I first met but...we're not so much anymore. I mean I still talk to her a lot but...I also avoid her just as much." Enola informed me. I frowned. She loved her mother more than anything.
"She blames me for everything that happened?" I asked Enola gently.
Enola nodded, "Yeah. She blames me too and doesn't like that I am not...she doesn't agree with my choices when it comes to Darcy." Enola just shrugged. She didn't know what else to say about her mother. "But...yeah...her and my dad are getting all cozy again I guess. Now that Sorcha..." Enola trailed off.
I nodded, "Darcy told me. I'm sorry."
"Thanks." Enola whispered, her eyes welling with tears.
"It was bad? Her passing?" I inquired. I knew that she needed to let go of some of what she was feeling.
Enola nodded again, "Yeah. My mom wasn't very helpful. All she did was say that she didn't know why I was so upset, Sorcha didn't raise me. But that's my mom, she'll be bitter till the very end." I hated seeing the sadness on her face. "And she looked so terrible, but I could see the peace in her eyes when I spoke to her the last time." I reached out and took Enola's hand in mine. I wanted to comfort her. "I'm sorry." She smiled trying not to cry.
"No. Don't be sorry. Cry if you need to cry." I stroked her knuckles gently to soothe her. "May I ask how she passed?" I spoke carefully.
"Cancer." Enola stated, her voice breaking. She quickly wiped tears from her cheeks. "She actually spoke to me about you the last time I got to sit with her." Enola chuckled. I lifted my eyebrow at her. Enola smiled, "She told me to stop being a coward and call you. Let you meet Darcy and everything. Tell you the truth about some stuff that happened while we were together. Make peace, ya know. Motherly things." Enola laughed, "She actually spoke of you often. It used to light a fire under my mom's ass. When I would go over there and you guys had done something new, Sorcha would be like, "oh did you see that your Harry and the boys got nominated for another Brit?" or "oh I saw the boys' new video". She always had a way of bringing you up." I smiled seeing a light in Enola's eyes for a moment.
"She was a lovely woman." I stated still stroking Enola's fingers. I really did enjoy Enola's step mother. Sorcha was amazing to the both of us through everything. Enola pulled her hand from mine and covered her face. Her shoulders shook a little and I heard her sniffle. "Noli, come here." Enola shifted across the sofa into my arms. I held her tightly as she cried into my chest for the second time. I rubbed her back gently and kissed her hair. I leaned back into the sofa with her in my arms, the way I had when we were in the sun room a few nights before. Enola laid her hand on my chest and breathed heavily, sobs shaking her body. I held her even tighter. I hated seeing her so upset. I wanted to take all of the pain from her. "I'm sorry, Noli. I'm so sorry, baby." I muttered as I kissed her hair again. Enola wrapped her arms around my waist and squeezed. I wanted to make everything better for her. I wanted to take all of the stress and sadness from her. I sat there silently with her in my arms, just letting her cry.


"Harry, why are you so tense?" Enola asked pushing of my chest a little. She had been curled into my side for the better part of an hour. She'd stopped crying a half hour before but remained cuddled into me.
"I'm not." I lied quickly. I was tense because she was in my arms and I didn't want to do something that would make her shy away or want me to leave her house. Enola gave me a blank stare. "I'm always tense now." I stated quietly. Enola frowned and sat up completely.
"Why?" Enola inquired with curious eyes. I sighed heavily and shook my head. "Come on, Harry. If you expect me to confide in you, you have to give a little as well." Enola grunted quietly.
I sighed, "I just am. I hold a lot in now. The boys have made it pretty clear that they are sick of hearing me "whine" about things." Enola frowned deeply and placed her hand on my thigh. "I'm fine though. I'm used to this."
Enola shook her head, "No. You shouldn't be." I leaned my head back on the sofa and smile weakly at her. "Is...Is there anything I can do to...help you?" She sounded a bit nervous. I shrugged and kept my eyes on hers. Enola smiled and her eyes lit up a little bit. She had an idea. Enola stood from the sofa and pushed her coffee table up against the love seat, out of the way. She grabbed a few throw pillows from the sofa and threw them to the floor. "Lay down." She commanded, pointing to the floor. I lifted my eyebrow at her. I wasn't sure of the idea. "Harry, lay down." She giggled quietly. I did as I was asked. I laid down on the floor my head on the pillows. Enola placed her hand on my chest as she knelt beside me. My heart began to race as I gazed up at her. I had no idea what she was planning. "Turn on your stomach." She instructed. I flipped over as she asked. My breath caught in my chest when I felt her climb on top of me and straddle my hips. "Now, talk to me." Enola murmured in my ear as she pressed her hands into my back. I groaned at the pressure. I loved when she used to do this. She slowly worked her fingers into my muscles.
I sighed heavily, "Can't talk when you do that." I dropped my head into the pillows with another groan. Enola giggled and kept doing what she was. My body relaxed against the floor as her fingertips pressed into my shoulder blades, kneading at the knots within my muscles. I groaned again when she pushed her thumbs into my spine, moving outward toward my sides. "Fuck." I grumbled under my breath when she pressed even harder. Enola laughed again. "Yeah. Yeah. I know. I sound like we're making love." I stated slightly embarrassed.
"Kind of." Enola laughed and pressed into my spine again. She laughed when I groaned loudly. "That sounds more like it." She teased. I turned slightly and grabbed her arm. I pulled her down next to me. I quickly trapped her underneath me. She was laughing hard and loudly as I poked her in her sides. I laughed as well when she tried to grab my wrists. "BEAR STOP!" She squealed, making my heart leap in my chest. Enola and I both closed our mouths quickly when we heard a noise upstairs. We stayed quiet for a few more moments, waiting for Darcy to come running down the stairs.
"I think she's still sleeping." I whispered to Enola. She nodded and kept her gaze on mine. I brushed a strand of hair away from Enola's face. She then reached up and placed her hand on my face. I sighed softly and let my eyes slide closed as she stroked my cheek with her thumb. After a moment her hand slid down to my neck then to my chest. I opened my eyes to see her big, blue, loving and nervous eyes. She was chewing on her bottom lip the way she would when she was waiting for me to kiss her. I lowered my face a little more, trying to place my lips on hers.
"Are we interrupting something?" Louis' voice echoed through the living room. Enola quickly pushed me away and she sat up. I let my head drop to the pillows. Once again the boys had ruined a moment that could've been absolutely perfect. I looked over to see Louis smirking in the doorway with Niall at his side. I glanced over to see that Enola wa bright red in the face. I sat up and faced Louis and Niall. "Seriously, do you want us to get out?" Louis chuckled. Suddenly, we all heard Darcy shouting for Enola from her bedroom.
"No. You're fine." Enola grunted getting up from the floor. She left the room as fast as she could. I stood from the floor as well. I picked up the pillows and placed them back on the sofa. I moved the coffee table back where it belonged.
"Harry." Niall laughed a bit when I faced him and Louis again. I lifted my eyebrow at him. "You and E were getting somewhere?" Niall asked, motioning toward my legs. I looked down and blushed madly. The woman knew how to get me worked up. I just shrugged it off. I knew that in a few minutes I would be fine. I flopped onto the sofa and leaned my head back again.
"What did we interrupt?" Louis asked as he sat down in the chair next to the sofa. I shook my head. "Liar. You had a solid knob." Louis laughed.
"We were just goofing around. Acting like idiots like we always used to." I answered quietly. Enola returned to the room without Darcy. "Is she okay?" I inquired when Enola took her seat next to me.
"She's fine. She..uh...she heard me laughing and...stuff." Enola murmured. I could see the embarrassment in her eyes.
"Oh. Sorry." I replied shyly. Louis and Niall were both smirking at us. The air had grown thick in the room. "I should go." I stated, getting up from the sofa. Enola looked up at me disappointed and saddened. "Bye Noli." I muttered before heading for the door. I heard Enola whispered something to Louis and Niall.
"Harry, wait." Enola puffed, jogging toward me. I had my hand on the door handle, ready to open it. I turned to her with a blank expression. She grabbed my arm and pulled me away from the door. "Stay." She requested. I sighed and looked toward the living room. "Please. Darcy would want you to stay." Enola knew that the mention of her daughter would hook me. I shook my head though. The situation was too awkward. She stepped closer to me, "I want you to stay." Enola's eyes dropped to our intertwined hands, "I feel better when you're here." I lifted my eyebrow. She had said that earlier as well. "Louis and Niall are only going to be here for a little bit." Enola tried to assure me. I agreed to stay.

Notes