Dark Star

It had been two days since the dinner party and my Mum and I were still not speaking. I didn’t dwell on it too much though, as my days were filled with work and Harry. I kept myself busy but the truth was I was trying to bury my emotions. I felt like the more people knew about Harry and I being together, the more I felt unsettled.

I had not bumped into Anne Styles since the dinner party but I had seen Robin and had exchanged a friendly greeting. As for my parents, I had studiously avoided them since the disastrous dinner party when Anne had informed them that their daughter was dating the infamous Harry Styles.

Being with Harry felt like my only relief, but that changed over the next few days. He had nothing lined up. No gigs and nothing else to occupy his time. As a result, he was like a caged tiger in a gilded cage. I’d watch him prowl around his bedroom, seeking solace in alcohol and pills.

One late afternoon, I lay on his bed and watched as he downed a vodka. We had just finished our first drink, but I suspected he had started drinking way before I had arrived. Despite that, he seemed tense. His eyes wouldn’t meet mine as he lay down next to me.

“Is everything okay?” I asked tentatively.

“I’m just… restless.” He said.

“What can I do to help that?” I asked and he looked at me for the first time.

“Have you spoken to Jack?”

I couldn’t help but smile at his words. It had been a few weeks since his first gig and it was becoming clear to me that this first taste of performing had made him hungry for more.

“Yeah I have… and he wants you back. He’s just waiting for you to say the word.”

“Can you tell him I wanna do it?”

“Sure… I’ll let him know the next time I see him.” I told Harry. He seemed to visibly calm down as he lay on his back and stared up at the ceiling.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah I’m just… I guess I’m just…” His hooded green eyes rested on mine “Restless.”

I steadily held his gaze before I spoke firmly.

“Take off your clothes.”

I saw a flicker of surprise in his eyes but he did not even pause and he took off his T shirt and slipped out of his jeans.

“Turn over.” I said.

“Huh?”

“Just do it.”

He lay on his stomach, his head turned to the side as he tried to look at me expectantly. I did not waste time, my hands massaging his shoulders and then slowly moving to his back. He seemed to flinch at first, the tension in his body rising so much that I had to put him at ease.

“Just relax.” I murmured. “Please.”

I know he had problems with intimacy but only when he was on the receiving end. But I persevered any way because I was fast finding out that just because Harry did not like something, did not mean he was right. Under my hands right now, I was leading the way and he was yielding to my touch. His muscles softened and soon I could hear him breathing evenly.

It was beginning to feel as good for me as it was for him as I caressed his tension away.

X

I finally caught Jack on his way into the bar the next day. He was in a hurry, but he took the time to listen to my pitch. I didn’t even have to convince him, he was totally receptive to the idea of Harry performing again and even proposed a date.

I noted it down and walked into work grinning, but it was not long before my grin disappeared. I had never felt entirely comfortable working at The Black Cat. The few guys who worked there were friendly enough but the girls were another story; I never felt as though I fit in.

I got a lot of teasing from the girls that day.

“Are you Harry’s manager now?”

“Who knew Ali was Simon Cowell in disguise?”

“Found your boyfriend a job?”

The last comment was from Chloe and although she was smiling, it was not hard to detect the edge in her voice.

“Aw, give it a rest Chloe.” Penny chimed in, giving me a reassuring smile.

“What? I was just saying…”

“Jealousy is a curse.” Penny cut in.

“Who said I was jealous?” Chloe frowned and then grew even more indignant when the other girls laughed at her. Before she could respond, Jack made his presence known. He took one look at my pink cheeks and bright eyes and took action.

“Ali, can you take your break now?” He asked before turning his attention to Chloe. “Chloe, you can help Len out in the kitchen, he needs a little back up.”

I discreetly thanked Penny, who merely winked at me. Jack gave me a loaded look and I could see the concern on his face but I could only turn and walk away. I finished my shift and headed straight home, looking forward to a long bath. Relieved to finally turn the key and walk into the house, I was slightly startled when I walked into the house to bump into my Dad.

“Everything okay?” He asked studying my face. I know that I must have looked tired and discouraged and as I tried to move past him, he placed his hand on my arm.

“What can I do to help?” He said.

“Nothing, I’m okay.” I mumbled.

“Ali.” He said and his voice was stern enough for me to look up at him.

“It’s just work.” I shrugged.

I tossed my handbag on the couch and headed upstairs.

“Not happy?”

“Not really.” I replied. I disappeared into the bathroom and rifled through my bath products before settling on a vanilla coconut bath oil. I lolled around in the warm bath for more than half an hour trying to relax, although my mind kept flitting back to work and Harry. The thought of Harry brought a small smile on my face as it dawned on me that I had forgotten to contact him and tell him about the upcoming gig I had booked for him. I hoped that the news would cheer him up as I wrapped a fluffy towel around my body before I realised I had left my phone downstairs. I got dressed and made my way to the living room when I heard my Dad call my name from the kitchen.

“I have to make a phone call!” I called back.

“Can you come here for a minute?” My Dad asked.

“Later Dad!”

I was already halfway out the door and I had already dialled Harry’s number.

“Hey.”

I smiled when I heard Harry’s voice. I didn’t waste any time, letting him know about how I secured his next gig.

“In two weeks’ time?” Harry mused before falling silent.

“Isn’t that great?” I said and then held my breath.

“You’re amazing… you know that?” I could almost hear him smiling and it made me feel good. I found myself sighing out loud, relieved that he was happy with the prospect of singing again.

“Are you home?” I asked with a sudden urge to see him.

An awkward pause followed before he replied.

“I have an appointment…”

“An appointment?”

“Yeah… with Dr Miller.”

“Dr Miller?” I said, a cold wave washing over me.

“I need to see her about a couple of things.” Harry told me. We spoke for a few more moments before we hung up.

Dr Miller. Why did he need to see her when he had me? It hurt me more than I could admit, but there was nothing I could do. Well, not yet.

I walked into the house feeling a little deflated, despite my earlier high, when my Dad’s voice broke into my thoughts.

“Are you going to talk to me now?”

“Sorry Dad.” I said sheepishly.

“I think I might have solved your problem.” He said with a smile. “I just spoke to Gary and he needs some help in the office.”

“Gary?” I said confused.

“Gary Brown… you remember him, don’t you?”

I thought for a moment and then recalled my Dad’s old school friend. I hadn’t seen him in years.

“Make sure you’re free on Tuesday.” My Dad told me. “He would love to meet you and fill you in on his business.”

“Thanks Dad.” I smiled.

A new job could be my perfect escape from the Black Cat.

“Why now?” I couldn’t help but ask.

“I think you need a fresh start. I would have done something earlier, but you always insist on doing your own thing.” He said wryly. "If someone can help you out... well maybe you just give it a chance."

He was right on so many levels. I needed a fresh start, and so did Harry. He was born to entertain and he did not need to run to his therapist every time something new was happening in his life.

A fresh start was what we needed. And I was going to make it happen.

Notes