Harry fills in his family about what's been going on.
I keep glancing at Ben who is super uncomfortable. He is taping his fingers on his thigh and is looking at the floor.
I kind of feel bad for him since I can tell this is the last place he wants to be and obviously Gemma isn't giving him an easy time.
"Hey," I place my palm on his taping fingers. His fingers freeze under mine and his eyes slowly find my own.
"Come help me in the kitchen," I whisper. He nods, happy to put space between himself and the Styles' family. Harry keeps talking though his eyes are following Ben and I.
I see a change in Ben. Truth, I've seen it a while ago. That time he picked me up in the pouring rain and delivered me straight to Harry.
And that time he didn't press charges, even though Harry beat him pretty bad. And now, he is here, at the house being a body guard.
I put on the kettle and take a seat by the counter. He joins me but keeps quiet.
"Hey Ben?" His gaze meets mine.
"Thank you," I tell him.
"You have nothing to thank me for."
"Yes actually, I do," I push.
"First for being here, it takes off some stress.. from Harry you know?"
"Yeah well.. I'm not doing it for him," he snaps.
"Yes you are.. part of it is for Harry... I know you love him.. you hate him but you love him.. you both are like brothers that have some bad blood between you... you don't get along but the moment one of you is in trouble the other will hurry in to help.. because like it or not.. in his mind he is the only one who is entitled to hate you and the other way around.." I watch him. He doesn't reply but he does shrug and I know he knows I'm right.
"Also.. thank you for that time you drove me to Harry... I was in a bad place and you helped me out and I will always remember that," I finish.
"I also did a lot of bad things to you," he replies to that.
"Not really.. you were a wanker at some point but not harmful.. how is Jade?"
"She dumped me," he smiles, though it doesn't reach his eyes.
"I'm sorry," I offer.
"No you're not.. she was a bitch and you disliked her," he chuckles dryly.
I don't reply. Instead, I get up and start making tea. I place a cup in front of him and he nods in thanks.
"He has changed," Ben pulls the cup closer to him.
"So did you," I reply.
"I outgrew the scene.. maybe he did too.. I don't know.. God.. I was such a dick.. I can blame the drugs and the alcohol but.. I'm still surprised Gemma didn't kill me at her door step.. I know she could," he shakes his head.
"Maybe you knew that.. this is kind of a do over for you," I shrug.
"Maybe.. or maybe I have a different reason for agreeing," he shoots me a stare. His eyes sparkle and I want to look away but can't.
"I don't think so," I whisper.
"Then you're naive," he cackles.
"Maybe.. or maybe I know there is more then you then what people think."
"You don't know me," he titles his head challenging me.
"I know enough. I know you love this family just as much as I do and you'll do anything to keep them safe. That is enough for me!" I claim. He doesn't reply, he only sips his tea.
When I glance up from my own cup I notice Harry watching us.
"I'll let you too chat," I tell Ben and get up, taking my tea with me. Harry strides in stopping in front of me. He places a kiss on my forehead before taking my seat.
I pace over to Anne and Gemma.
"How are you keeping up love?" Anne questions.
"I'm OK.. I know people are concerned but I think it will all be alright.. we are doing OK," I say into my cup.
"You're scared," Gemma notes.
"Not for your self though," she adds when my eyes snap to hers.
"What if someone gets hurt because of this? You two or El? I'll die," I whisper.
"You won't.. you'll be heartbroken but you won't die... and anyway we are all safe," Anne speaks.
"Cass.. we should head back," Harry is back in the room, followed by Ben.
"Thank you for coming.. you need to visit more," Anne says.
"Right.. we will.. I promise," I smile, standing up. So do Anne and Gemma and they take their turn hugging me. Ben walks Harry and I to the car.
"Ben.. take care alright? Be smart.. be safe," I reach up and place a kiss on his cheek before climbing into Harry's car.
Harry bumps fists with him and claps him on the back before getting in himself.
Once inside Harry turns to gaze at me.
"He's in love with you.. you know that right?"
"He think he is.. he'll figure it out.." I shrug.
Harry doesn't respond. He starts the car and off we go.
"If we wouldn't have got back together... would you have gone out with Ben?" Harry finally asks after over a half an hour of quiet.
I study his profile, since he is careful not to glance at me. A part of me wants to answer sarcastically and tell him I couldn't wait to jump him the moment I landed back in the UK and the only thing that stopped me was the fact he had his sluty girlfriend. However, I held myself since I am smart enough to note this is his reassuring that I am a 100% in this. In love with him, and that I have no eyes for anyone else.
"Never."
"You're so sure of your answer," he claims, slightly mocking me.
"Yes. I am! The fact you can so easily forget us doesn't mean that I can too!" I snap, anger rushing through me. What the hell Harry?!
I watch him wince. He knows he deserved such a reply.
"I didn't mean it that way.. I'm just saying he has changed.. he grew up.. he's good looking he's-"
"He's not you!" I cut him off.
"Exactly! He's not me! I bet you if you were dating him and asked him to quit racing he would have without blinking.."
“And you would never hit me.. even when drunk!” I cut in. Harry snaps his mouth close.
"You gave it up in the end as well.." I remind him my voice softer, "and I didn't ask you to give it up for my own benefits! I begged you to leave it for you! It was getting out of hand and dangerous! I would have never asked you such a thing if you weren't in any danger!" I claim, hurt.
"Right. Fair enough... sorry..." He sighs.
"I have no idea what has gotten into me.. I just.."
"If you need reassurance that I love you just ask! Don't try and push me onto other guys! The same way you have nothing to worry when it comes to Liam and Justin there is nothing for you to worry with Ben.. we aren't even friends.. I was just trying to make him feel a little more at home.. he seemed so uncomfortable," I mumble.
"You have a good heart Cassie.. you know that?"
"So do you Harry... believe me.. so do you.."
He reaches for my hand and brings it to his lips, placing a kiss on my palm before lacing his fingers with mine and keeping them on his thigh.
When we get back to campus it's late and quiet. Julie is long asleep and so Harry decides to go back to Liam so we don't wake her with all the noise. After making sure I lock up he turns and heads down the stairs.

I go wash my face and brush my teeth too tired for a shower, then change into shorts and a tank top.
I'm about to get into bed when my phone vibrates.
"Justin? What's wrong? Did Harry get to you?" I'm startled by his late night call.
"I don't know I'm not at the dorms- Cassie I got a message.. with photos and all.. I'm outside your flat.. please come down I'm scared," he is jittery and alarmed. I sit up and let my mind race, trying to decide what is the right thing to do.
"Call Harry! He can help best," I decide.
"Come down and we'll both go to Harry.. please Cassie.. they freaked me out!" He begs me.
"Why? What have they done? It's just a message.. just photos.." I try to reason with him.. to calm him.
"No! It's photos of my sister! My little sister! Please Cassie! If they got to her it's on you guys! I have nothing to do with this but be your friend!"
That gets me moving.
"I'll be right down!" I assure him.
I slipped on my bra under my tank top and get a jumper to pull over it.
I then get flip flops, keys and phone. I rush down to find Justin parked right outside the building, pacing back and forth.
"Justin!" I call to him. He turns sharply and I can see he's been crying. My heart pinches at the sight of his tear streaked face.
"Show me," I say softly, placing a hand on his shoulder.
He hands me his phone and sure enough there are photos of a blond little girl, holding a teddy. The little girl is familiar and I cannot place her face, however I don’t give it another thought and turn to Justin.
"I'll drive," I tell him since he is in no shape to get behind a wheel. He agrees and hands me the key.
I get in and adjust the seat so I'll be closer and higher.
"Justin.. Harry will fix this I promise you," I whisper as I start the car.
"Is he going to start racing? Because it seems to me this is the only way for them to back down," he snaps.
I remind myself he is angry and worried for his sister, which is why he is acting this way.
"Have you called your parents? Maybe you should give them a call.. check in?" I offer.
He shakes his head.
"How old is your sister? Maybe call her?" I try.
"She is six.. she doesn't have a phone," he whispers.
"I'm sorry you got caught up in this Justin.. it's not fair.." I tell him and I mean it. This isn't fair. This is between Harry and this crazy person.
"Life isn't fair though.. is it? Sometimes people who have nothing to do with a matter get sucked in.. get hurt.. ollateral damage right?" He snaps.
"Yeah well.. still.. it's not fair.." I mumble.
He is mean because he is angry and scared. I keep telling myself this as I start the car and start manoeuvring it out of the car park.
"You know Cassie? You're a good person.. and you too shouldn't have been sucked into this.. I'm sorry you'll get hurt in the process," Justin says.
I send him a confused glance.
"Justin? What are you talking about? I'm not getting hurt and neither are you! Harry will get us out of this! He always does! Have a little faith in him," I order.
“I’m already hurt.. I’m already way in this.. I’m just sorry for you,” He flashes me a sad smile. He holds on to the door and seat. And I'm about to ask him what is going on when we get jolted. The hit comes from the driver's side and I feel the air bag press between me and the wheel. I move my feet. They hurt but I don't think anything is broken. I glance at Justin and he is shaking his head as if trying to clear it.

Before I have a chance to ask if he's alright, my door opens. I turn to thank the person who came to check on us, but before I have a chance to open my mouth I notice the gun coming down on me, hitting me on the head and everything goes dark.

Notes

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