Tell me if you love me

Ashleys POV:

Planning a wedding is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. There is so much to be done now that me and Calum have finally agreed on a date, it seems like time is running faster than usual. I have finally picked who my bridesmaids will be, its so hard because I keep imaging Laurel in the dress we all agreed on. Anika has literally been my rock, without her I would be in a mental asylum babbling about lace and flower bouquets.
I don’t know why but I feel like there is something to prove by making this wedding run smoothly, I want to prove everyone who thinks I’m making a mistake wrong. Melissa corners me as I rush to see who’s call I have just missed “Woah! Ashley!” she says grabbing my wrist

“Stop okay, you need to relax there’s still two months till your wedding, seriously chill out!’ she looks at me worriedly and then guides me to the couch “Stay” she orders as I start to say “Melissa I have to” “Im going to make you a coffee, you’re going to drink it and relax, if you even know what the word means anymore” I give up and sink back into the soft cushion, it does feel nice.

Melissa comes back holding two steaming mugs, she sets one down in front of me. “Ashley I’m getting seriously worried about you, weddings aren’t meant to be this stressful! You’re working yourself way too hard and… you dont seem happy” “What do you mean?” I demand “Im sorry” she says raising her hands “its just you always seem sad, even when this is meant to be a happy thing, I miss the relaxed you.” I dont know where the tears come from but they come fast, I begin sobbing and shaking. “Ill tell you the truth Melissa, I’m scared everyone I love leaves me, I feel like unless I make this happen now the same thing will happen again and I just dont know how I’ll cope if it does” “Oh sweetie” Melissa says stroking my hair. “Ash, look at me” I look into her kind eyes “I once made the biggest mistake of my life, leaving your brother, and I hate to break it to you Ashley but I may have left him but he never left me in here” she gestures to her heart.

“I think you’re scared to admit it, you dont want to hurt anyone but theres no point living a lie, a life you’re unhappy with just because you’re scared that you’ll be alone, but let me tell you something its far worse being surrounded by people and feel alone than to be alone and loved.” I stare at her and then hug her “I love you Melissa, you’re amazing” I say “I know” she smiles. “What are you going to do?” she asks “Set things right” I reply.

I knock on Calums door, he answers his face lit up. I look at him, I can almost see the future we could have, almost. Theres no easy way to break someones heart “Calum, I’m sorry” I say “What?” he says confused. “Im so so sorry, I hate myself for doing this to you, but us, it can’t even happen” I look up and see his eyes have hardened “Why?” he demands “Was it Luke, I’ll kill him” he mutters. Could this be going any worse? I think hard about what to say but settle on the truth “Yes, it is” his face breaks down and I would give anything to make things fine again.
But all I can do is apologise, again and again.

“You were always his, this is my fault I never should have gone after you, its me who should be apologising I kept clinging on to you even when I knew I didn’t have a chance” “I never did did I?” he asks me sadly. I am speechless “I’ll always love you Ashley, now go to him, like you should have done a long time ago. I reach for the ring still on my finger “Here you should have this back” I say trying not to cry myself “Keep it, it only ever belonged to you.” A tiny bit of me breaks as Calum Hood walks away from me, like this is the last time I will see him.

I suppose it is the last time I’ll see him without a barrier between us.

Notes

Hey guys! Sorry the update took a long time! I was thinking I'm going to end the story soon but would you guys like a spin off maybe in either Laurel, Luke or Calum's POV? Tell me what you think!

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