Tell me if you love me

Ashleys POV:

Sometimes I wake up in the night and just sit there letting my thoughts swirl around my head, tonight I just sit there and think of Luke and though I dont want her to keep coming into my thoughts, Christine. I slip on my slippers and rummage under my bed for the one thing I know will distract me, its the first time I have felt brave enough to look inside.

My most treasured possession, it doesn’t look much to anyone who sees it but to me it means the world. There is a picture of me and Laurel at six years old on the front of the box and surrounding it a mad mess of glitter, sequins and anything else we could get our hands on that day, it is the history of our friendship. Carefully, I take of the lid and feel tears coming to my eyes at the first thing I pick out, the friendship bracelet Laurel gave me I still remember the day she gave me the bracelet, I refused to take it off, even when I showered. I feel my heart squeeze and suddenly I can’t take it any more I shove the lid back on the box and put it under my bed, I should never have opened it, I’m not ready.

I wake up and I’m late for school, great just great. After that my day just goes downhill. I am almost crying with frustration when I finally reach the hospital its like whenever anything goes wrong in my life every bad thing happens at the same time. I sit beside Luke, thankfully Christine or anyone else are out of sight. I grab his hand and am scared by how normal it feels that it is cold and dead, I shake my head trying to picture the old Luke not this faded version who I know associate with him. “Luke, its so hard everyday without you, Im begging you if you can hear me try your best to come back to me, too much people I love leave my life, I dont want you added to the list.” As I say this I realise how true it is I think of Calum, I dont know why I just do all the good things he did for me definitely outweigh the bad, I hate being this way with him, so distant. Its like Luke lying unconscious next to me is making me wake up from a deep sleep. I realise that I want all the people I love close to me, everyday I have with them is precious.

I get out my phone, of course I still have his number I couldn’t bear to delete it, I type “Hi, meet me at the hospital” he replies “Okay.” I sit there wondering what the hell I have done watching Luke’s struggled breathing for the next ten minutes. Then, it happens the machines around him start to frantically beep and the heart rate monitor leaps up, flashing red lights light up the room and I scream for the doctors, the nurses for anyone who can help.
I am ushered out of the room by a panicked nurse, screaming, sobbing trying to reach him.

The nurse is trying to talk to me asking me stupid irrelevant questions as I try to squirm out of her reach, I need to be with him, I wasn’t with Laurel I need to be with him. “Ashley calm down please, love this isn’t helping” I scream louder and finally am free of her grip I run like I never have before and let out a screech, doctors surround him and I see the expression on their faces, he’s dying.

“You promised, you promised you wouldn’t leave me Luke” I scream, but no one is listening. I sink to the ground burying my face in my knees.
Just one last time, I would give anything to hear him say he loves me one last time.

Notes

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