I've Got This Friend

"Look at you two, all happy and not a couple." Michael jokes as Ash and I walk through the school doors like we used to do.

I try to laugh at little, but sense Ashton tense up at his words. "Yep." I nod popping the 'p'. "Anyways, what are we doing today?"

"We normally go to Ashton's house, but here lately we haven't been around there so.. I don't know." Luke says.

"It's okay to come over today. My parents wont be home." Ashton replies.

"Why does it matter if your parents are home or not?" Calum asks this time.

Ashton shrugs. "Never mind. But yeah we can all go to my house after school and hang out for a while."

"By hanging out, I hope you mean me beating your ass a FIFA!" Michael laughs, making Ashton cringe.

"Gross, I hate FIFA."

"Who doesn't like FIFA?" Luke and Calum say both at the same time.

"Me." I raise my hand, giggling.

Michael sighs. "Oh my.." He says, but doesn't finish his thought.

"I'll see you after class guys." I wave them off to go to my stupid English class.

***

"Hey." Ashton smiles as I meet up with him at my locker after school.

"Hi." I smile back at him.

"I'm glad we're all back at my place today. It feels like nothing has changed." He says, but the truth is everything has changed whether we like it or not.

"Same." I say as I put the rest of my books in my pack.

We both walk out to Michael's car since out the five of us, he's the only on that drives. "There you guys are. Ready?" We nod and all climb into the truck.

The whole way there consisted of screaming lyrics and yelling at people with our windows down. Ashton kept his eyes on me the whole time, sometimes scooting closer to me when he could. To be honest, I didn't mind. A part of me wanted him to sit closer to me.

"Home sweet home." Ashton sighs a happy sigh as we all casually walk up to his room.

"Who's going against me?" Michael tests, sounding cocky.

"Your on Clifford." Calum says.

"No. I wanted to go." Luke whines, plopping down on Ashton's bed.

I chuckle and shake my head at them. Since I'm here all the time, I know where everything is, and I don't feel rude by allowing myself to search around for things. That being said, I exit the room and hike my way down the stairs into the kitchen and pour myself a glass of juice.
I take a sip of it, and almost spit it out by Ashton's huge posture staring down at me.

"Ashton!" I squeal. "What are you doing?"

"Sorry I just wanted to see what you were doing." He says quietly.

I sigh, clutching my heart, my breathing going back to normal. "Ash, remember what I said about us going back to normal?" He nods, his face turning red. "Your not doing that."

"I'm sorry. I just-I wanted-"

Aweh, I felt really bad for him. I smile and sit my glass on the counter top, coming back to face him and wrapping my arms around his neck. Ashton's long arms instantly wrap around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I let him go, and drag my hands down his chest, wanting him closer to me, but I was too scared to let him know that.

"I just want you to want me this way." Ash whispers, placing his forehead to mine so I could feel his breath on my face.

"I know." I respond, and muster the strength to push him fully away from me.

"Where'd you go?" Luke asks as soon as I enter, still sitting on the bed, clearly not having a turn.

"Oh I went to go get a drink."

"Where is it?"

Damn I left it on the counter. "I finished it." I lie.

Luke makes an 'o' with his mouth but doesn't make a sound, and turns back to the T.V.

***
"Goodnight, Ashton, we'll see you tomorrow." The three boys wave him goodbye, loading into Michael's truck.

"Night." He nods to them.

"Bye, Jessie, we love you."

"I love you all too." I giggle.

In the distance I can here them fighting about who I love most. "Ready?" Ashton asks as the truck fully drives away.

"Mhm." I nod, and we make our way down the road to my home.

Ashton is such a great guy, but I just don't know if I could picture us a couple. No correction: I could picture us a couple. It's just I'm afraid that I may not be good enough for him. I'm afraid that maybe we think that our friendship could last through this even if we did break up, but it really can't. I would be crushed without Ashton in my life, and if that means we have to stay friends in order to keep him, than so be it. I don't know maybe I'm in too deep already.
My thoughts are pulled as we reach my driveway. "I'll see you tomorrow." Ashton nods and starts walking away.

"Ash, wait." My mouth involuntarily calls for him.

He turns around and raises his eyebrows for what I have to say. "Um.. be careful on your way home."

Ashton scoffs and turns around, his image getting smaller and smaller in the distance.

Notes

Sorry guys if you thought this was an update :/ I didn't realize that I spelled FIFA wrong and I had to change it, but it wont let me edit for some reason, but luckily I had this saved on Wattpad and I had to copy and paste it all over again. Ughh. But anyways thanks for reading this, and I really hope you guys like it :)