I sat in my hotel room bed staring at the television. I wasn't really paying any attention to what was happening. I wasn't even sure of what I was watching. I sighed heavily and turned it off. What was the point of having it on? I reached for the book that Enola had given me while we were in Paris. I was almost finished with it. She loved it and the more of it I read, the more I understood her and felt closer to her. As I cracked open the book, there was a knock on the bedroom door. Probably Dale.
"Come in." I stated blandly. The door opened and my heart lept. Enola. "Baby, what are you doing here?" I asked jumping off the bed, throwing the book back on the night stand. Enola wrapped her arms around my neck and hugged me tightly. "What's wrong?" I asked as I squeezed her once more. She shook her head as she gazed up at me with her loving blue eyes.
"I felt so bad about leaving you when you were so upset. I just wanted to make sure that you were okay." Enola answered sliding her hands over my shoulders to my chest. I kissed her forehead tenderly.
"I'm fine now, Noli. I promise." I murmured to her.
"Good then we can have our night in tonight." Enola grinned at me.
I lifted my eyebrow at her, "Don't you have to be at home? Isn't asshole going to be pissed you're not home?" Enola glared at me a bit. "Sorry." I huffed though I didn't mean it.
"No. I asked him if he would be okay for the night if I went to my studio to work because we have whatever damn thing tomorrow. He told me to go for it. Sooo, here I am. Ready to snuggle and watch movies." I chuckled and pulled her into my arms again. "I love you, Harry. More than anything." Enola whispered.
"I love you, Noli." I replied with a satisfied sigh.
Enola and I laid in bed completely nude just staring at each other. We'd not even come close to making love. We just felt like being closer. I let my fingers dance up and down Enola's arm ever so softly making her giggle. I smiled and kept doing it.
"Kiss me." She whispered placing her hand on my face. I leaned in and meshed my mouth to hers. Slowly, she moved closer to me, pressing her naked frame to mine. I sighed feeling her bare breasts against my chest. "Can we just stay right here like this for the rest of our lives?" Enola asked with a dreamy voice. I held her closer.
"I'd like it more if we were in that house we talked about in Paris. Our own house, you know. Our bed. Not some hotel room." I replied. Enola smiled up at me and kissed me sweetly. "And I think I'd like to be doing a bit more than kissing you." I smirked. Enola chewed on her bottom lip. "Come here, Noli." I grinned pulling her on top of me as I rolled onto my back. Enola straddled my hips and pressed her fists into the bed on either side of my head. I slid my hands from her hips to her arms, taking my time, feeling every centimeter of her skin. "I love seeing you up there." I murmured to her. Enola blushed and shook her head. "What? I do. I can see every single detail of your body while we're making love. I like that." Enola flushed even more. "You're absolutely beautiful." I whispered. Enola lowered her lips to mine. We stayed like that, kissing passionately for the longest time. I flipped her onto the mattress so she was underneath me. Just as I was about to adjust our bodies so I could take our little make out session to the next level, her phone started to ring loudly. I groaned when she reached over and checked the screen. It was Charles. "Don't you fucking dare." I hissed at her when her finger hovered over the "answer" button.
Enola frowned deeply and answered the phone anyway, "Hello?"
"Un- fucking- believable." I sneered flinging the blankets off our bodies. I climbed out of bed while Enola spoke to Charles quietly. She was telling him how to do something. I grabbed my jeans off the floor. I started to dress myself as she finished up the conversation.
"Baby, what are you doing?" She asked concerned, throwing her phone back onto the nightstand. "Harry, what are you doing?" She repeated sitting up. I tried not to let my eyes and dick lead me back to the bed when the blankets fell from her bare breasts. "Harry." Enola whined as I grabbed my shirt from the end of the bed.
"I'm going to Paul's room." I replied sourly. "Be around people who actually care about my fucking feelings."
"Harry Styles." Enola snapped at me. "I had to answer. I'm sorry. I'd rather not have to deal with his temper tomorrow. I have to spend the whole day with him tomorrow."
"Fucking leave him then!" I shouted at her. Enola frowned and her lip quivered. "Never mind. That's too much to ask right now." I huffed before walking out of the bedroom. I slammed the door behind me. I heard her jump from the bed.
I sat on Paul's sofa staring at the wall, my chin resting on my fist. I knew that my mood was bringing everyone else down just a little. I needed them to make me feel better.
"Harry, is everything alright?" Paul asked me with a small smile. I nodded even though it was obvious I was pissed off. "Hey Niall, will you get that?" Paul requested hearing a knock on the door. I groaned loudly knowing that it was Enola. "The hell is your problem." Paul chuckled. I heard Enola's voice in the doorway.
"That." I grunted pointing toward the door. Everyone in the room appeared shocked. Within the next moment, Enola was in my lap. She straddled my thighs and gripped my shirt collar. "Let go, Enola." I growled trying to remove her from my lap.
"No!" She yelped, holding on tighter.
"Enola, go lay down. Take a nap or something." I huffed, rubbing my forehead. I knew that my stress level was rising with the boys and other people watching us argue.
"I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what is wrong." She snapped at me.
I glared at her, "You know exactly what is wrong! You answered the phone while we were trying to..." I trailed off when I noticed the amused faces around the room.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry I answered the phone when you wanted to make love! I'm sorry!" Enola wailed.
"Enola." I huffed, becoming more embarrassed by the second.
"But that is not all that is bothering you. You wouldn't have yelled at me the way you did!"She was nearing tears.
"Noli, just leave me alone right now." I grunted at her. What I was feeling wasn't something I wanted to discuss in front of everyone. Enola grabbed my face and made me look her in the eyes.
"The day I leave you alone when you're angry is the day I stop caring about us. I'm never going to just leave you alone. I'll sit right here and bother the piss out of you until you tell me what is making you act like this. I don't care if your friends are sitting here. I care about you and what I can do to make you feel better." Enola spoke calmly and quietly. I sighed softly. She was right. I knew she was right but I still hated what I was feeling. "Tell me how I can make it better."
"Get a divorce." I replied bitterly. Enola frowned deeply and pulled her lip between her teeth. She was fighting the urge to cry. I felt horrible for saying it in front of everyone but I couldn't do it anymore. I hoped she would drop the topic since we weren't alone. Enola released my face and wrapped her arms around my neck. She rested her chin on my shoulder and hugged me tightly. I felt worse and worse about yelling at her by the second when she buried her face in my neck. I felt a few tears on my skin. My heart was breaking. Granted what I said hadn't been the worst, but the venom that came with the words hurt her. She loved me because she never had to fear the words I said. Because I would never make her feel the way Charles made her feel. She loved me for the purest of reasons.
I scolded myself silently. I knew how she felt about me. I knew that she only answered the phone for Charles so he wouldn't be mean the next day. I knew that after that phone call he would've left her alone for the rest of the evening. But after seeing her with him today, I couldn't help the way I was feeling. When she laughed at him, the light in her eyes was genuine. But her boredom within each shop and the rest of the trip was apparent. But the way she let him lead her through every shop, she didn't seem to mind it. She loved me. She was risking so much by meeting me in Katy's shop, right under his nose. She was also risking it coming to me after spending the whole day with him and even when she came to me after the concert. I was being foolish. "Can I just apologize and let it all be over with?" I whispered in her ear. Enola shook her head and hugged me tighter. I glanced around the room to see many pairs of sad eyes, even though they were all watching television. I stood from the sofa with Enola still in my arms and wrapped around me.
"I guess we're going back to my room." I announced shyly.
"Making up already?" Paul laughed teasingly.
Dale shook his head, "Not even close." I frowned and I could feel Enola tense. He was the only person that had ever really heard us argue. He was there when we argued for the first time while she was on tour with me. He was there when we argued in the car about me inviting Katy along to the airport. He was there in Paris when we finished off our argument about Charles. He was rarely in the room but because his hotel room was always next to mine, he always knew what Enola and I were doing.
"We'll probably just go to sleep." I stated honestly. Sometimes, after the big arguments, Enola and I didn't have the ability to make love. At the moment, I thought that she would be too emotionally exhausted to have make up sex.
I set Enola down on the bed. She stared at me with saddened eyes as I knelt in front of her.
"I'm sorry I yelled at you the way I did. I shouldn't have. I snapped." I stated gently.
"No." She grunted at me. I could see that she was starting to get angry now. "You're not going to do this. You're not going to apologize then kiss me, and make love to me and try to make me forget about it. I'm not doing that." I sighed heavily and ran my hands through my hair.
"What do you want then, Noli?" I snapped at her again.
She gripped my shoulders gently, "I want you to talk to me. Tell me what's going on. I want to know why you're so angry all of a sudden." She lowered her voice again, "Why you mentioned my divorce like that."
"No. You don't." I puffed. I didn't think that she could take it. I didn't want to hurt her feelings any more than I already had.
"Harry." She whimpered. "I do. I may not like it but that doesn't mean I don't want to know. This can only work if both of us put the effort in right?" She repeated what I had shouted at her many times before. I inhaled deeply, trying to find the right words. "Bear, I can take it. I'm a big girl. And I've had much worse things said to me." Enola pleaded quietly. I nodded slowly. Enola sat silently, knowing I was trying to collect my thoughts.
"I didn't like seeing you on his arm. You were holding his hand and leaning on him." I spoke softly. Enola frowned and tears started to form in her eyes. "You smiled at him and laughed at his jokes." I added. Enola just stayed quiet, wanting me to say what I needed to. "He spoke to you and you looked excited." I felt a lump in my throat as I said, "You let him kiss you." Enola ran her hand through my curls gently, trying to soothe me. "I felt like I was choking on air when I saw him kiss you. I felt like I was going to be sick and even though you're right here with me..." I tried to breathe evenly; I didn't want to cry. But that was going to happen anyway. Tears started to fall from my eyes, "I can't help but have this nagging feeling in my stomach that you'd rather be with him. That you're happier with him. But I know how you are after you've been with him and not me. I know that it's not true but I can't..." Enola brushed the tears from my cheeks with a tender swipe of her thumbs. "I know that I said I wouldn't get jealous. And I try not to let it get to me. I try to stay strong and tell myself it's not going to be much longer but I can't." Enola quickly wrapped her arms around my torso and squeezed me tightly. She tried to soothe me by twining her fingers in my hair and kissing my ear. "The thought of him touching you drives me mad." My voice broke as I said it.