LOVE PLANT

I am up in the guest room reading a magazine can’t really go outside to do anything as it’s pissing down with rain, of course it is I am in London good choice to come here good choice. I just got back from having drinks (coke I had) with this guy who I met at the club the other night I didn’t even realise we had exchange numbers but he text me and I just thought sure why not. Before I left though I think Harry might have been a little jealous but anyway moving on from that.
The radio playing and mirrors is on I absolutely love this song. As I am about to turn it up. Harry comes into the room.
“Did you have fun with club guy” that’s a weird reference I thought to myself.
“It was fine you weirdo.” Yep his definitely jealous.
“So I have one simple question for you” Oh no here we go
“Why London?”
“Why London what?” I am very confused.
“Come on you could have picked any place in the world to come for your first overseas trip and you pick London why?” Harry says.
“WHY THE HELL DOES IT MATTER?” I yell at him,
“YOU COULD HAVE GONE TO GREECE WHERE YOUR MUM IS FROM OR ITALY WHERE YOUR DAD IS FROM OR FRANCE OR”…… I’m not going to let him finish; I have to say this here and now.
“BECAUSE YOU IDIOT I’M STILL IN LOVE WITH YOU!” I went there I said shit was that a bad idea?
I look back up at him and he has a little smile on my face and so do I. I don’t think I should have said that though it is true I love Harry I probably always will, but what kind of person does this make me he left me when I needed him the most I know I say it’s in the past but it still hurts ever since I have had this void that I am trying to fill but it’s not happening. If I let him treat me the way he did, I never thought it was possible to love some one too much – but maybe it is.
I grab my coat and just run outside the house lucky it has stopped raining. I walk and walk I just need to clear my head and think about what I want. I don’t even know anymore. Harry and I it consumes me. But Niall has stuck by me through everything. He came and stepped up into my life when I needed someone there and I fee for him instantly. And I am not afraid to admit that now.
I find myself sitting on a park bench just starting at the grass. Then I see Harry he found me somehow. We just both sit there in silence both of us staring at the grass.
“ I have forgiven you for what you did” I can see Harry turn his head looking at me but my head stays focused on the ground.

Notes