Life As a Star
The Fix
Claire’s View:
I couldn’t feel myself breathe, I stood up and backed away from the blanket, I couldn’t do it. He was so deceiving, so persuasive. I didn’t want second thoughts. I didn’t want to second guess my decision. So I wasn’t going to, if he really thought this was going to change my mind then he thought wrong.
“Harry, I appreciate you opening up to me, to us,” I motioned to Niall who looked ticked off, “I know these past couple days haven’t been easy for you. But… if you would take yourself out of the equation for one minute and look around at all the other people here who were hurt, then maybe you would start to understand. The only reason you haven’t gotten it in your head already is because of your attitude. You only think of yourself, you only think about what you want. What about me, what about Niall and the other guys. We all have our wants, our opinions and thoughts. It’s not just you, so when you talk about you and I, there is no you and I. You asked me to make a decision, well I already have. I choose Niall, every second of every day. These past few days have been hectic and chaotic, but he’s been there for me through thick and thin. He looks to me with admiration and compassion and… and…” I blinked back the tears surfacing on my eyes as I tried to look away.
Niall’s View:
“I look to you with admiration, inspiration, compassion, and love.” I finished the sentence I knew she was trying to speak. She looked up at me and smiled, a smile that shined brighter then the sun, the same smile that took my breath away and stole my heart the minute I saw her weeks ago at the VMA’s. Harry sat speechless in between us. Claire knelt down beside him and put a hand on his shoulder, I knew it was hard for her and she wanted to make it easy, but I still felt anger when she touched him.
“Harry, please don’t shut out the world, don’t shove us away. I know better then anyone that doing that is the biggest mistake. When people hurt, when you lose someone, you get really angry,” I wanted to pull her into a hug, because I knew she was thinking about her dad, “but when you do that, you hurt yourself even worse. I am always here for you, as a friend yes, but as the best friend you could ask for. I may only be 17, but I’ve experienced enough to help you through this. I’m always, always going to be by your side when you need help. I don’t like to see people hurt, because we should be enjoying our lives while we still have them. I’m sorry, I really am. I was stupid, but I’m young and dumb and I make mistakes like everyone else. I just had to make a big one in order to find out who I belong with, and I’m sorry that it included you. Believe me if I could take it all away I would, if I could relieve you of your pain I would. But you have to fight through this, we have to, together.” At this point she had all three of us crying. Harry looked up to her as he cried, which is something he doesn’t do often, but the past few times he has it’s been because of Claire. I think that’s a beautiful quality, to say such wonderful and gracious things you bring emotion and tears to those listening, which is just one more reason why I love her so much.
“I’m sorry…” Harry choked out the two words just in time before breaking into a sob. Claire’s eyes grew watery and she cried with him. I just watched because I knew they had to figure this out first before I got involved.
“I accept your apology, but I’ve already forgiven you, I always do.” She looked at me and smiled as we both remembered the day in the park, when we met and bonded and started something new.
“Oh god I’m so sorry…” Harry couldn’t stop crying. Claire bent down and wrapped her arms around him, he did the same and they held each other hugging. This time though I didn’t feel anger. I knew that this was the apology that would make things better. They held on for about five minutes before separating and hugging again. They laughed and sat back awkwardly. Harry turned his body around and looked to me. I’d never seen him like this before, not even when he cried over missing his family. I could tell this was hurting him more than it should to face me and apologize.
“You don’t have to apologize, its okay.” I put a reassuring hand on his shoulder but he pushed it away and gave me a hug instead. Surprised, I hugged him back. I looked to Claire who was smiling happily, just the way I like her to. I mouthed the words, ‘thank you’. She placed her hand on my cheek briefly as Harry and I pulled away.
“I shouldn’t have done it, from day one.” Harry was about to spill it, I didn’t want him to, but Claire had a right to know. He turned to her and she looked confused.
“What are you talking about?” She asked.
“The day we first met, when I bumped into you on the sidewalk and walked you home. I wasn’t just walking the streets and meeting you just because. Claire, the whole reason I tried to get to know you in the first place was because I was going to be Niall’s wingman. I was supposed to help you and him get together. The reason it got so out of hand, was because I fell for you instead and that’s why this all started. It was never your fault. It was my fault and always will be.” I sighed and shook my head and Claire just sat there in disbelief. She blinked a few times and rubbed her hands on her head. She closed her eyes and opened them back up at my speaking.
“Harry, you can’t blame this whole situation on yourself, we all made mistakes along the way and caused more bad things to happen. I lost my temper and got drunk, you fell for my girl, and Claire broke your heart. We all made bad choices, but you know what the bright side is?” I looked to him but Claire answered.
“We’ll learn from it and remember these mistakes forever.” She smiled and reached her hand out, I took it and we helped each other up. Harry got up and we all looked at each other. “Now let’s go have a good day and try to forget about this alright? Let’s try to be grownups for at least 24 hours, can you do that?” She asked shyly. Harry laughed and I grabbed her hand. We all walked back to the house together, passing the pool.
“Wow, the water is crystal clear today, isn’t it?” Claire pointed out. But I was too busy scheming to respond. Harry and I looked at each other and smirked.
I couldn’t feel myself breathe, I stood up and backed away from the blanket, I couldn’t do it. He was so deceiving, so persuasive. I didn’t want second thoughts. I didn’t want to second guess my decision. So I wasn’t going to, if he really thought this was going to change my mind then he thought wrong.
“Harry, I appreciate you opening up to me, to us,” I motioned to Niall who looked ticked off, “I know these past couple days haven’t been easy for you. But… if you would take yourself out of the equation for one minute and look around at all the other people here who were hurt, then maybe you would start to understand. The only reason you haven’t gotten it in your head already is because of your attitude. You only think of yourself, you only think about what you want. What about me, what about Niall and the other guys. We all have our wants, our opinions and thoughts. It’s not just you, so when you talk about you and I, there is no you and I. You asked me to make a decision, well I already have. I choose Niall, every second of every day. These past few days have been hectic and chaotic, but he’s been there for me through thick and thin. He looks to me with admiration and compassion and… and…” I blinked back the tears surfacing on my eyes as I tried to look away.
Niall’s View:
“I look to you with admiration, inspiration, compassion, and love.” I finished the sentence I knew she was trying to speak. She looked up at me and smiled, a smile that shined brighter then the sun, the same smile that took my breath away and stole my heart the minute I saw her weeks ago at the VMA’s. Harry sat speechless in between us. Claire knelt down beside him and put a hand on his shoulder, I knew it was hard for her and she wanted to make it easy, but I still felt anger when she touched him.
“Harry, please don’t shut out the world, don’t shove us away. I know better then anyone that doing that is the biggest mistake. When people hurt, when you lose someone, you get really angry,” I wanted to pull her into a hug, because I knew she was thinking about her dad, “but when you do that, you hurt yourself even worse. I am always here for you, as a friend yes, but as the best friend you could ask for. I may only be 17, but I’ve experienced enough to help you through this. I’m always, always going to be by your side when you need help. I don’t like to see people hurt, because we should be enjoying our lives while we still have them. I’m sorry, I really am. I was stupid, but I’m young and dumb and I make mistakes like everyone else. I just had to make a big one in order to find out who I belong with, and I’m sorry that it included you. Believe me if I could take it all away I would, if I could relieve you of your pain I would. But you have to fight through this, we have to, together.” At this point she had all three of us crying. Harry looked up to her as he cried, which is something he doesn’t do often, but the past few times he has it’s been because of Claire. I think that’s a beautiful quality, to say such wonderful and gracious things you bring emotion and tears to those listening, which is just one more reason why I love her so much.
“I’m sorry…” Harry choked out the two words just in time before breaking into a sob. Claire’s eyes grew watery and she cried with him. I just watched because I knew they had to figure this out first before I got involved.
“I accept your apology, but I’ve already forgiven you, I always do.” She looked at me and smiled as we both remembered the day in the park, when we met and bonded and started something new.
“Oh god I’m so sorry…” Harry couldn’t stop crying. Claire bent down and wrapped her arms around him, he did the same and they held each other hugging. This time though I didn’t feel anger. I knew that this was the apology that would make things better. They held on for about five minutes before separating and hugging again. They laughed and sat back awkwardly. Harry turned his body around and looked to me. I’d never seen him like this before, not even when he cried over missing his family. I could tell this was hurting him more than it should to face me and apologize.
“You don’t have to apologize, its okay.” I put a reassuring hand on his shoulder but he pushed it away and gave me a hug instead. Surprised, I hugged him back. I looked to Claire who was smiling happily, just the way I like her to. I mouthed the words, ‘thank you’. She placed her hand on my cheek briefly as Harry and I pulled away.
“I shouldn’t have done it, from day one.” Harry was about to spill it, I didn’t want him to, but Claire had a right to know. He turned to her and she looked confused.
“What are you talking about?” She asked.
“The day we first met, when I bumped into you on the sidewalk and walked you home. I wasn’t just walking the streets and meeting you just because. Claire, the whole reason I tried to get to know you in the first place was because I was going to be Niall’s wingman. I was supposed to help you and him get together. The reason it got so out of hand, was because I fell for you instead and that’s why this all started. It was never your fault. It was my fault and always will be.” I sighed and shook my head and Claire just sat there in disbelief. She blinked a few times and rubbed her hands on her head. She closed her eyes and opened them back up at my speaking.
“Harry, you can’t blame this whole situation on yourself, we all made mistakes along the way and caused more bad things to happen. I lost my temper and got drunk, you fell for my girl, and Claire broke your heart. We all made bad choices, but you know what the bright side is?” I looked to him but Claire answered.
“We’ll learn from it and remember these mistakes forever.” She smiled and reached her hand out, I took it and we helped each other up. Harry got up and we all looked at each other. “Now let’s go have a good day and try to forget about this alright? Let’s try to be grownups for at least 24 hours, can you do that?” She asked shyly. Harry laughed and I grabbed her hand. We all walked back to the house together, passing the pool.
“Wow, the water is crystal clear today, isn’t it?” Claire pointed out. But I was too busy scheming to respond. Harry and I looked at each other and smirked.
