To this point in my life, I had always had control over my life, over my feelings and over my emotions, but lying in bed with Allie next to me, I realized that I was on a collision course into something new. I was falling more and more in love with her, something that I had only just begun to admit to myself. How could someone whom I had known for less then a month have so much sway over me? I wasn’t sure and I didn’t really care. All that mattered in that moment was that Allie was with me, hand entangled in mine, legs so mixed what I was not sure which ones belonged to who. I had asked her to stay the night, to let me just be with her, and she had obliged. We had spent the rest of the afternoon together; finally making it to bed around ten in the evening since I knew I had to be at work tomorrow early. She had taken the shirt off my back to wear as her night gown, saying “I want to feel you close.” Oh God, how that made me want to jump her bones, but I knew better then that.
Just before drifting off to sleep, I knew that I was ready to say those three small words, so I softly murmured, “I love you.” Planted a kiss on the top of her head, and drifted off to sleep.

I couldn’t sleep; my head was spinning from the events of the day. But resting in bed with Liam, I didn’t want to leave. He was so warm and holding me so tight to him, it just felt right. I tried to steady my breathing and to shut off my mind, but I kept thinking about the coffee shop and my father, but mostly of Liam and how I hated the fact that he thought I had betrayed him. All I wanted to do was to love him and to never hurt him, but it seems that I was going to have to be a lot more careful then I had initially anticipated.
The feel of his soft shirt, which wafted his sent to me, felt like butter against my skin. The hand against the small of my back which hugged me closer both scalded my skin from his heat, but also felt so right, like it would never let me go. I had heard a phone buzz on the nightstand, but neither of us went to check it, neither of us really caring about anything than the two of us lying together.
I could feel his heart beat against my head which was resting on his chest, and the rising and falling of his chest began to even out, slowing in pace. I knew he was just about to fall asleep, when he softly and delicately mumbled, “I love you.” And kissed my head. I knew he thought I was asleep since I had been pretending for a while now, simply relishing the feeling of being with him. He promptly fell asleep after his confession.
As if my mind had not been racing enough, now I knew I would don’t be getting to sleep any time soon, but rather going over ever scenario in my head. He had said he loved me, now what do I do. Am I in love with him? What is love? How do I know that I am in love? Should I tell him that I know he said it to me in the morning? Do I pretend like I was asleep and never heard it? Is he going to say it to me again? Was it simply he talking in his sleep? Was he saying it to me when he thought I was asleep because he is not ready to say it to my face?
I came up short of an answer for any of my confused mind’s questions, falling asleep sometime shortly after. I must have had a fitful night’s sleep since when I woke up, the covers were all a mess and Liam was not with me. 5:17 read the clock.
Slowly and begrudgingly, I forced my body up and waddled into the bathroom, where Liam was already dressed and was busy brushing his teeth.
“Did I keep you up with my tossing and turning last night?” I asked, adding, “I don’t feel like I got any real sleep last night.”
“No you didn’t, but it didn’t help that I had a very fitful sleep last night too.” He said, still with a mouth full of toothpaste.
“Why are you up so early?” I asked, planting myself on the counter next to him.
“I have to get to work.” He said before rinsing his mouth then leaning over to kiss me still with some toothpaste residue in the corners of his mouth.
“There is an extra toothbrush under the sink.” He said as he pulled away.
“Sorry about that.” I grumbled, still halfway asleep.
“Don’t apologies, it is kind of cute.”
“Sorry.” I mumbled and he shot me a sideways glance.
“I’m going to go make some breakfast.” He said before he left me to my own devices in the bathroom.
After doing my duty, brushing my teeth and attempting to make myself look a little less disheveled, I went to join him. He was sitting at the table with toast, cheese, tomato’s and a cup of tea for both of us.
“You know, I still don’t understand these British breakfasts.” I explained as I sat down. “To me, cheese is not really a breakfast thing, but for some reason, I really like it.”
“Well, I don’t get a lot of things, but I don’t question them if I don’t have to.” He said, looking at me through his eyelashes. “Allie, will you come to work with me for a little bit? I think we need to talk about those pictures that are floating about.”
“I need to get to work by nine.” I replied.
“Paul will be at the rehearsal space by six, he already texted me to tell me that. The P.R. people will be there too. I don’t know if you heard my phone ring last night, but that is what it was about.” He said with a bite of food in his mouth.
“Alrighty then, looks like I’m going to work with you.” I said.
“I will apologize now that you have to meet the boys like this. I had planned on introducing you to each of them individually so you didn’t get too overwhelmed, but looks like that is out of the picture.” Liam said.
Breakfast continued pretty routinely, neither of us remarked about the three words Liam had said last night, nor did I know if he even knew if I heard them. I put back on my jeans from the previous day, but decided to wear one of his clean V-neck shirts instead. We left the apartment ten minutes to six and had a car waiting for us to take the two of us away.

“You must be Allie.” A tall and dark hair man said to me in a thick Irish accent. Extending his hand, I shoot it. “I’m Paul Higgins, I am the boys bodyguard and tour manager.” He said.
“Why do you and Liam both refer to them as the boys?” I asked, honestly curious.
He chuckled, “Because that is what they are, children. I have known them for six years now, I believe, and they are still as rambunctious and childlike as the first day I met them.”
“Alright. Well it is nice to put a face to the name.” I said.
“Why don’t you two come with me and we can discuss our next plan of action.” He said, almost scaring me. Why should we have to have a plan of action? We just started dating and it is not like the whole world is going to collapse because of it.
Shortly after entering a large conference room dominated by an equally grand conference table; two women joined Paul, Liam and myself. The taller of the two introduced herself as Defranka, while the second, presumably the assistant, didn’t make so much as a peep.
Liam and I sat on one side of the table while Paul, Defranka and the no named assistant sat on the other. It was like the one time I had been sent to the principle’s office in middle school. I felt like I was in trouble, like they were going to drill me with questions before scolding me.
Defranka was the first to talk in a think and overdraw German accent, almost as if she faked it to make herself cool. I made a mental note to ask Liam about it. “Vell,” she began. “I vas looking at ze fotos of you two and I zink ve can make zis vork for us.” Oh boy, this accent was going to get old fast!
“I don’t want a press release with her name in it.” Liam firmly demanded, squeezing my and as a reassurance.
“But ve have to give a name.” Defranka said.
“I don’t think you understand me! There will be no mention of Allie’s name. In fact, if we can cover it up, that would be great.” He said, as he stood firm in his belief.
Paul butted in, “Look, Liam, I see where you are coming from, but you know what the fans are like. They will stop at nothing to figure out who she is.”
What did he mean the fans would stop at nothing to find out? They were just fans, I mean how much damage could they really do?
“If ve get a handle on zis now zen it vill be better. I zink ve nee to say zat you have just met and are madly in love.” Defranka said as her no named assistant zoomed a pen across her note pad, as if every syllable that came out of Defranka’s mouth was god’s own words.
“Hand on a second. Don’t I get a say in this?” I asked.
“Of course you do, but I am just trying to protect you. You don’t know the fans.” Liam said, not admitting what I knew: that he wanted to keep me all too himself.
“I am a grown woman, Liam. I can hold my own.” I said to Liam before turning to look across the table. “Paul, Liam trusts you and so I trust you too. What do you think we need to do?”
“We will start with a press release that states you two met at, lets say…” Paul began.
“A coffee shop.” Liam chuckled.
“Alright, a coffee shop, last month and that you are taking it slow and having fun. That neither of you are too serious.” He said.
“And vat about ze girl?” Defranka asked. “I zink ve need to say she is an American who is… I don’t know. Vat are you doing in London?”
“I’m working on my higher education.” I said.
“Are you two ok with this, the press release?” Paul asked.
I nodded in reply, but Liam said, “Not really, but I don’t really have a say in it, so please just protect her as much as possible.”
“I will Liam, I will keep her safe for you.” Paul said in a fatherly like tone. “We can finish this. Why don’t you two go find the boys?” he dismissed us and, not waiting a second, Liam led me out of the conference room.