Catching Red Eyes

“You got everything?”

“Yea, and if I forgot anything I can just get it in Red Bank.”

Finals were over, college was over, and I was ready for the summer back home. I needed out of this city. I needed fresh air and the ocean and the sun back on my skin. Graduation was still a couple weeks away still but I was pretty sure my 4.0 GPA was secure. I felt accomplished even in the midst of all the chaos that happened to me in my last semester. I was putting Harry behind me. I started calling it my “infamous rendezvous.”
Marc and George offered to extend my internship after my I walked for my graduation but I asked for a bit more time off. They finally broke down and agreed I would start back up in the middle of July which gave me enough time to catch my breath.

“Well, just text me when you get there and I’ll see you in a few weeks for graduation!!” said Laurie, as she flung her arms around me. I gave her a quick wave as she hauled a cab and I was left by myself in front of Penn Station. I was familiar with the train and didn’t mind the hustle. I slipped my headphones in and rolled my suitcase behind me and waited for the boards to change to tell me what track I needed to board.

This was the first time in what felt like ages I was able to just sit and not think about anything. My mind was racing from the second Harry slammed my front door to just about right now. I took a deep breath and felt like I was actually going to be ok. I even almost smiled to myself but then I saw it. My eyes drifted over to one of the many concession stands in Penn Station and there he was staring back at me. The magazine headline read, “HARRY STYLES WITH MYSTERIOUS BLONDE, WHO IS SHE?”

The overwhelming sensation to rip every one of those stupid magazines off the stand was almost unbearable but I told myself to breath and stay calm. I also wanted to open the stupid magazine and read what it said and look at the pictures but I also told myself no. I needed to be strong and I needed to be mature about the situation. I was a college graduate now.

I was immediately startled by the amount of commotion around me and realized the boarding stations were called. I grabbed my suitcase and bag and found my train. I settled into the seat and felt proud that I had walked away from the unbought magazine. I took out my headphones and pulled out a book I had been meaning to start to read and settled into the seat as the train conductor came around looking for our tickets.

After about twenty minutes of reading, the train stopped and more people boarded. I watched as two teenage girls chose the seats opposite me and to my horror saw in the one’s glitter painted fingers was that same magazine I was only a half hour ago desperately trying not to rip open.

The picture only showed him with a blonde in tow and he was holding her hand. Her head was down so I couldn’t see her face but I saw his. His eyes were bright and green, his hair pulled back, and he was wearing his familiar black, torn jeans. His tattoos were peeking out from his button up shirt. He wasn’t wearing a jacket so I assumed maybe he was somewhere on the West Coast. I suddenly realized I was staring at their magazine and quickly went back to my book.

After a few minutes, I overheard them start talking about the magazine. They were comparing some celebrity to another and talking about some other celebrity’s fake lips.

“Here it is!!”

“Lemme see, lemme see!”

“Quit elbowing me, I’ll just read it to you!”

“Fine, just don’t leave anything out. I wanna know who that blonde chick is, probably another model.”

My stomach did somersaults. I don’t know if God was trying to play some sick joke on me by allowing this to happen right no but I couldn’t believe I was about to hear who Harry’s new girlfriend was from a pair of teenagers reading from a magazine. I knew all I had to do was put my headphones back in but I couldn’t, not now. Someone needed me to know who Harry was with and I waited with baited breathe as the girl began to read.

“Harry Styles spotted outside Capital Grille with none other than the new face of Calvin Klein. Petite and slender, 5’8” English model with a killer catwalk and legs for days. The two have been spotted all over LA, seeing concerts and even sharing an ice cream cone. Sources say the two have been close friends for almost three years now and it was only a matter of time before they started dating. “They are absolutely divine together and just a couple months ago he even brought her to meet his mother in New York,” says one source. Is it in the stars for Harry Styles to have finally met someone he can stick with? Stay tuned for more!”

“Ew, of course she is a model.”

“I know, right. Well, remember that other girl he was with like a couple weeks ago, wasn’t she a model too? She had blonde hair.”

“No, I don’t think she was, remember the magazine said she went to NYU or something.”

“Oh, duh, you’re right. At least she was somewhat normal I guess.”

Was this a joke? Were there cameras on this train? Was someone about to pop out and say “there’s a camera, there, there, and there!” This wasn’t real life right now. Thank God, the two girls got off the next stop and never once looked at me. There were so many thoughts that were running through my head. I was fuming. After everything he said to me during our fight, he was the one betraying me. The journalist in me knew that a fake and fabricated story would sell especially about someone as famous as Harry but this was personal. Whether it was true or false, I didn’t need this right now.

I wiped away the tears that had escaped from me and gathered my belongings. My stop was finally next. I needed to get off this train.

As I was about to call a cab, I heard a very familiar voice calling my name.

Notes