California Café

I played with my thumbs as my hands hugged each other on the table. Matt was describing the travels he took last month, but I couldn’t comprehend anything he sentenced. My mind was still on the woman I had let go without even a name. I had been glancing back to her empty table out of habit for the twenty minutes since she had left. It was pathetic of me.

I took a sip of my coffee, now cold but still bitter, and tried to zone into what Matt was ranting about. He was finishing his accounts of the end of his recent trip. It was so cliché, but I could not get this girl out of my head. Without a doubt, I thought, I would forget this girl by tomorrow.She was just another pretty face who I let get away. After all, the heart desires what it cannot attain.

I downed the remaining liquid in the yellow mug and waited for Matt to finish as well.


“What are you doing the rest of the day?” He asked.
“I don’t have anything planned yet. I have to work out sometime today and I was hoping I could get a little color on my skin,” I said glancing down at my pale winter cloak.

He called the waitress over for the check.

“Michelle is dragging me shopping,” he sighed in annoyance, but his eyes betrayed his intent. Everyone knew he was incontestably in love with the woman.

I ginned and chuckled for a short few seconds. “You are whipped. When are you proposing?”

He rolled his eyes at my response. “You are just jealous you don’t have someone important in your life.”

“Right you are, mate,” I said as my eyes shifted back to the empty table on the wall.

“I want to pop the question, but I don’t know if it’s the right time. What if she says no?” He slid his fingers through his dark hair and rested his hand on the back of his neck. I saw the worry sewed into his face as he spoke.

I rested my elbows on the table and clasped my hands together. “You guys have been together for what? Six years?” He nodded. “Everyone knows you two are bound to settle down together. Hell, you two both know it too. She loves you way too much to hesitate at all. She would never say no and I know you know that.”

He released the back of his neck and set his arm down on the table not in the least bit gentle. “I know, I know. I’m just really nervous. I know we both want it, the marriage and forever and kids and such, but it all kind of scares me.”

“It’s life and time. It sure scares the bloody hell out of me,” I reasoned.

He widened his eyes and nodded his head as if I had hit the nail on the head. He swallowed another taste of his drink. “So what about you? Anyone in your life at the moment?”

I let out a vexed wind of air from my throat. “Not right now. I’m just having fun, I guess.”

“You look a little worried there. Disappointed?” I watched as he sat there amused at my demeanor. His smile was so wide that I could see his tongue between his open set of teeth.

“I don’t know,” I mumbled, looking at my sandwich. “I’m just tired of these girls. I’m a good guy, aren’t I?” I flipped my head back up at Matt. “I mean, I am just over the publicity, the charlatans, the fakeness. It’s hard enough to find friends.” My forehead tightened as my eyebrows moved closer together. “But I don’t want anything like a serious relationship at all either, so I guess I’m getting what I bargain for.”

“You really are a good guy, Harry. I think you might just be looking in the wrong places and choosing the wrong girls. And you have plenty of time to search for her. Look at me and Michelle, our relationship came when I least expected it.” He chuckled. “And I don’t know why you’re stressing over it if you don’t want that type of girl yet.”

I sat there and digested his input;y somehow I caught myself staring at the same empty seat again.

“You ready?” He asked, placing cash in the black folder that the waiter dropped off short moments before.

“You don’t need to pay.”

“Well I just did,” Matt said. “I’m guessing you aren’t finishing that sandwich and I’ve got to get out of here before Michelle gets antsy.”

I laughed as I left my chair and relied on my own legs. “Whipped,” I teased.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m lucky to be whipped then,” he shot back as we left our unfinished business at the table.

Matt opened the door and I looked back to the table one last time. I don’t know why, but maybe my mind was attempting some sort of sorcery in bringing her back to the table. Or maybe it was my mind pairing up with luck to notice the phone lighting up on the empty table.

“One minute, mate,” I said to Matt as he was already outside.

I tapped the sides of my legs nervously as I walked to the table.

I looked down to the three missed calls and a few messages that lit up the phone. I wasn’t sure if I was lucky enough for this to be her phone. The phone was on her side, though. I picked it up, disregarding all the opposing screams of my conscience. What was I doing? What was I supposed to do with it? I thought she would surely come back to look for her phone if this was hers.

I unlocked the phone and thanks to my luck again, there was no passcode I needed to crack. The screen opened up to a dog, covered in a full cloud of curled white fur. I smiled at the innocence of the wallpaper. Realizing Matt was waiting for me outside, I foolishly shoved the device in my tight jeans.

“What were you doing?” Matt asked as I stepped out into the sunshine.

I mustered up a lie. “One of the workers wanted a picture.” Matt accepted it quietly and we walked to his car on, which was parked on the curb.

We sat in silence as I fought every urge to take out the burning sin in my pocket. I was truly pathetic. Why did I take her phone?

Matt slowed in front of my house, a white modern one story behind a white cemented wall. The wall was short enough to be able to see into my yard, door, and windows, but I still thought it served a statement of the privacy I wanted.

I thanked him before stepping out of his sleek coupe.

“You alright?” He asked, curiosity in his eyes and worry in his face.

“Yeah, I’m good. Thanks again. Hit me up soon and have fun shopping with that leash around your neck,” I joked.

“Sure thing. Don’t be jealous of the whips and leashes,” he rose his brow.

“Oh, God,” I chuckled and shook my head. “I don’t want to hear this. Safe drive,” I waved.

I rushed to get to the security gate on the wall and almost sprinted inside my house.

“Okay, calm down, Harry. God this is ridiculously pathetic,” I spoke to myself in the emptiness of my house. I took a seat on the brown leather couch, stiff and uncomfortable, but it would have to do for the time being. I slid my finger over the screen of the phone as I did before and decided to look at the messages to try and figure out whose phone this was. Wait, no, I fought myself. Maybe there were pictures of the owner on the phone. I opened the photos app and scrolled through a few photos of the three faces I had seen in the café. I went through countless photos that were meaningless to me, but meaningful to the owner. I exited out of the individual photos to the camera roll after growing impatient. My eyes latched onto a familiar face, a familiar smile and rare eyes centered inside a full body of soft blonde hair. My thumb hovered over one of the images as if I were afraid of what I would see. I knew the picture was of her already and I knew this was her phone. I just had a feeling. Pathetic.

I lowered my thumb and the picture opened up. I recognized her in the middle of a group of people in front of a large lit and colorful Christmas tree. She was glowing, her lips were painted red and her hair was curled, much more uniformed than her messy waves today. She had on a black dress, but when I looked up at her eyes, I still couldn’t distinguish the color. Both were red and I cursed the camera. I deduced she must have been surrounded by her family in the photo because they all shared some similar features. This had to be her phone. It had to be, I thought. I exited the app and tossed the phone on the glass table in front of me. Would it be a horrid idea to look at the messages? I went against my morals and picked up the phone again. I needed to figure out who this was and return it to the owner. Yeah, it was all for the benefit of the owner.

I paced around the large entrance room; the strike of boot heel to hardwood echoed through the vacant house. Somehow the encasing of my house pushed me to invade the owner’s privacy. The house was silent and inhospitable then. My inner felt alone and solitary. Maybe, I thought, this could be the one. I felt hope, for what I wasn’t sure. If anything I thought I could get a thank you shag out of this and this girl would be clear from my thoughts.

I changed my mind and opened the green phone app with four notifications. There were three missed calls and one voicemail all from ‘Raymond Brooks.’ The jealous side of me made quick conclusions, but I knew better than to listen to those, considering I had been on the opposing side of jealous accusations many times before. Without thinking, I pressed the blue triangle as well the speaker option underneath and the unheard message penetrated the spectral silence.

“Res, it’s Raymond. I have to go out of town next week and I need you to watch Lindsay for us. I know you have work, but she has preschool and Rachel said she would keep her until you get off. I don’t want her deal with another kid. Thanks. Call me back.”

The cold cut of his voice intimidated me. Whoever Raymond was had to be someone close to her though, I thought. Res, was that her name? I knew calling the number back would be my best option even though I was still a little hesitant.

I took a walk into the kitchen, clean and barely used with a reason. After drawing out a bottle of water from the fridge, I took a seat at the breakfast bar. The cold water cascaded down my throat, cooling the heated knot. I wasn’t sure why I was so nervous. God damn, I cursed myself for being pathetic once again. I stood up from my seat in the kitchen as I willed myself to hit the man’s name. I paced around the kitchen and started pacing through the rest of the house, something that was becoming a habit of mine. I waited through each ring, which engendered my heart rate to intensify.

“Hello-“ I released my unknown stress as I heard the same man answer my call.

Notes

xo.