The Babysitter

"Please come out Mickey," Luke pleaded through the door.
"No," I cried, "I don't want to see you,"
"Please," his voice cracked, "I would never hurt you, you have to believe me."

"You almost did," I hiccuped.
"I know," I heard him sniffle, "and I hate myself for it. Please just give me another chance. I'm begging you,"
Was he crying? I leant my hear against the door, staying completely silent. I heard a small sob escape his lips. I stayed for a minute before I slowly opened the door. I peeked my eyes out and saw him sitting on the floor, his back on the wall to the right of the door.

That was the look of pure vulnerability. Luke would never let such "weakness" ruin his tough guy, "too cool to care" exterior. He had a rep to keep up. This had to be serious if he was crying. I've never even considered the idea of him crying before.

He sprang to his feet and pulled me into the tightest hug I've ever been in.
"Oh my god. Mickey I swear to god I never meant to hurt you. I was so scared that you were going to get hurt and-"
"Stop," I interrupted.

His shoulders went limp. He looked so sad.
"I don't get you Luke," I shook my head, "one minute you're sweet and funny, and then the next you're so mean to me,"
"I'm sorry," he sniffled, "I just have a hard time dealing with my feelings. I just try to push them away, but I can't sometimes and when that happens I don't know how to react,"
"You can't just do that Luke," I told him, "you need to talk to someone,"

"Well no ones ever home," he mumbled, "I'm always by myself. I know I act like I'm fine, but I'm not. It fucking sucks,"
"You know that I'm in the same situation that you are. I can help you Luke, but you don't let me," I frowned.
"I can't," he whispered.
"Why not?" I asked.

He took a step back. I could see the internal battle going on inside of his head. His eyes were darting back and forth anxiously. He brought his hands up and tugged on his fluffy blonde hair.
"Luke," I said softly, "you can tell me,"
"No," he shook his head.

"Please," I took a step towards him, "I want to help you,"
He rocked back and forth on his heels. His eyes were everywhere but me. I wish were in his head. I always wondered what he thought about during the day, how he processed things, what he thought about others.
"I didn't want you to go to the party because-because...." He trailed off.

I waited for a moment. He was staring at the wall above my head emotionlessly. His blue eyes were slightly wide. It worried me.
"Because why Luke?" I asked softly.
"Because I was scared," he choked out.
"Scared of what?" I tilted my head, "you know I'm careful about parties. I wouldn't have gotten hurt,"

"No," he shook his head, "I know that. I was scared.....because I thought that I was going to lose you,"
What? That made no sense. He just said that he wasn't scared of me getting hurt. How would he lose me? There was no other way for me to be lost.
"What do you mean?"

"I just-I really like you Mick," he blurted.
He looked shocked that the words came out as fluidly as they did. He couldn't believe he just admitted he liked me.
"Fuck," he mumbled, "that wasn't supposed to come out,"
"You like me?" I gawked.

He had the biggest blush on his face now. It was so cute, seeing him all nervous and embarrassed. It reminded me of when he sang the other night. That was the only other time I think I've seen him so insecure- my exposure doesn't count okay?

He breathed, "you know what? Fuck it. Yes. I do. I like you a lot. I didn't want you to go to the party because I thought you'd see that guy and then he'd take you and I would never have a chance to tell you how I really feel about you,"
My hand flew over my mouth in shock. I don't think anyone has ever said anything nearly as heartfelt and sincere to me as he did just then.

"I know I'm such an ass and I treated you horribly and you have absolutely no reason to like me," he stared at his shoes, "but I want to make it up to you,"
"okay Hemmings," I smirked, "I'll cut you a deal,"
He looked up hopefully.
"you show me that you aren't an asshole before our parents get back and I'll give you a chance," I crossed my arms.

His jaw dropped for a moment. He nodded his head immediately, but once again, he could seem to form a vocal response.
"Good," I smiled a little, "you've got....9 days,"
I turned and started towards my room. I went up the stairs.
"Mickey?" He called.
"yeah?" I looked over my shoulder.
"thank you," he grinned.

i gave him a thumbs up, "don't make me regret my decision,"
i heard him laugh a little.
I got to the top out of the stairs. I was out of his sight, but if I stood at the right angle from the opening I could still see him. Curious, I stood and watched.

he stood there for a moment staring down at the floor. A smile grew on his face.
"fuck yeah," I heard him say softly while he pumped his fist in the air.
I had to cover my mouth with my hand to stifle my giggles. There was more to Luke Hemmings than I knew. I was so happy to find out.

Notes

Hi guys! You are absolutely fucking superstars! I had a little trouble today, but I finally have the funeral and wake behind me and I feel much better than I did on Monday. You guys made me so yapok with all your well wishes too! I hope this chapter serves well enough as a thank you! Words cannot describe how much I love you all.
To end this, I want to tell you a little thing I learned from my coach. People are not always who you think they are. You may not necessarily like someone bc you think they're different or quiet or even weird. But you don't know them, you don't know what they've been through. I'm not going to say I had the perfect relationship with him, bc I honestly didn't. But he taught me so much more than I realized till now and I feel like he doesnt know how much I appreciate him. So if you appreciate someone, tell them, because they can be gone just like that.
xxx Hayley