Running Through My Mind

"I need to run"
I said hastily after I sat through my follow up appointment about my foot.

The podiatrist looked at me like I was crazy.
"As a professional, I would say that is very unwise. The fracture is only a small bone in your foot I get that," he paused and looked at me "but besides the amount of pain you would be in, you could risk injuring the foot even more. It is healing very well but I really strongly advise you not to run for another two or so weeks."

"But, if I did choose to run now there is no guarantee that it would damage it even more?" I asked feeling the adrenaline build in my legs.
"Well no, but I really don't agre-"

I politely interrupted him, "Well i appreciate the advice, but running is my life. I have barely been hanging on by a string these days and it is a lot cheaper than therapy" I said earning a light chuckle from him, "so let's hope the next time I see you, you're not telling me 'I told you so'."


Before he could make me change my mind I was out of my seat, which he accepted and he smiled at me and left the room.

I hurried out to my car and drove faster home than I ever have in my entire life.

I ripped open the door thankful that no one was home seeing as how I had been avoiding my friends since the night I left Harry, a little over a week ago.

I also have not seen or heard from Harry that night, which is no surprise.

I began to get worried again after remembering how cold and dark his eyes had looked that night. They held such a familiar emptiness that I could only compare to Luke when he starts acting up.

Luke.

My stomach churned, and before I knew it I was racing towards the bathroom.

I dry heaved into the white bowl and silently told myself that it was going to all be okay. Even though on the inside, deep down that it would not.

I picked myself up off the cool tile and stared at myself in the mirror. I slowly removed my shirt to look at the bruises that were covering my arms in the shape of his fingers. I flinched as I ran my hand across them, and felt my eyes begin to burn.

"No." I said out loud to nobody but myself. My sadness quickly evaporated into anger as I grabbed my running shoes out of my closet and laced them up.

I took my iPod off of my bureau and put the head phones in, and with absolutely no desire to hear my own thoughts turned the sound up to maximum volume.

I stepped out of my house feeling empowered once again as I set out on the familiar route.


Harry's P.O.V

It had been more than a week since I had been entirely sober.
I didn't care, but everyone else seemed to start thinking something was up.
I laid another line out on the desk, and before I knew it the familiar rush hit my entire body at once.

I don't know why I started doing this filthy habit but I do remember when.

It was after an L.A. show one night, when I saw the brown haired beauty meet my eyes at some sleazy downtown club. The music was too loud, I was too drunk, and everything about her was wrong. She made her way over to me slowly and I watched every movement that her long legs made. She was hauntingly beautiful, the kind of beauty that could only lead to one thing.

Before I knew it I was dragging her to the back of the club and running my hands up and down her tan legs. I remember how badly I wanted her, but before I could take it any further she pulled me away into the bathroom revealing a small plastic bag. I gladly accepted only thinking I'd do it once.

I scuffed thinking about where I was, I in no way had a problem but there was definitely a large part of me that enjoyed it. I put everything away and went back into the living room where Zayn and Louis sat playing some video game.

"We should go out" I said clapping my hands together.

"It's only seven o' clock mate" Zayn looked at my raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, don't you think you wanna take the night of seeing as how it's been probably a week since you stayed home?" Louis said.
I could feel a conversation starting, and wanted to take absolutely no part in especially since I knew it was about me.

I inhaled and began to prepare a lie, "Yeah you know you're right, I'm just gonna go take a walk to the market then and come back, want anything?"

They both offered an accusing no and then shared a glance before turning back to their game.

I strolled across the living room and out the door, not wanting to waste any second of this high.

I saw a girl run past me, and it was absolutely breath taking.

Her form, the dedication written all over her face, and the way her feet seemed to float above the ground.
Her long blonde hair flowed back and forth with every step she took and I felt my stomach flutter.

At first I was confused as to why I had a feeling when I was just checking out some girl, but then I realized it wasn't just some girl. It was Briar.

All the anger I had held against her had vanished the minute I stepped outside of her flat. I had been constantly thinking about her for the last week and the moment that I saw how pure and innocent she looked while running I immediately regretted what I had been doing since the night I had last seen her. She paused and hunched over at the end of the street and began to stretch, I saw her try to take off again but she began to limp.

I had to go see her.

Briar's P.O.V

I had run ten miles, and my foot had been hurting for about 9.9 miles. Around mile 5 it began throbbing, and by mile 8 it was begging me to stop. I knew at this point if I continued I would probably be side lined for double the amount of time I was initially given so I stopped at the end of the street and felt my body slowly start to give on me. I began to stretch and thought that with the break and if I went the short way home I would be able to make it.

With my second step I felt a sharp pain in my foot and knew that I was done for the night. I began to limp to the nearest shop so I would be able to call a cab home.

I was just about to take a step as I felt a large hand wrap around my bicep. I let out a blood curdling scream and thrashed my arms about, to which my ear buds came flying out of my ears.

Just as I went to punch my attacker I heard a familiar raspy voice call out "Oi! Briar it's just me!"

I turned around to find an out of breath Harry behind me.

"Jesus Styles" I said in between breaths, "were you following me?" I asked looking him up and down. He looked like shit to put it nicely.

"What? No I lived right over there" He said pointing across the street, "I saw you start limping as I was leaving and figured I'd come help you out." He said running his hands through his hair.

I felt my cheeks heat up and realized how bitchy that probably came out as ,"I'm sorry. Thank you for coming over to check on me, I'm just a little on edge seeing as how I thought I was being kid napped." I playfully pushed on his shoulder.

He smiled at me and offered a small laugh, " would you like a ride home? I was just about to go to the market and I already have a car waiting for me."

I began to shake my head no but then my foot sent me another stabbing pain, "Yes actually, I'd appreciate that."

He smirked, "Wow you must be in pain if I didn't even need to convince you."
He offered out his hand and I gladly accepted again, leaning into him so he could help me walk across the street to his car.

He opened the door for me and gently helped me into the car.
A twinge of guilt shot through me seeing how nice Harry really was even after what had happened. Maybe I owed him some sort of explanation.

He went around to the other side and got into the car. It was about a twenty minute drive from his house to mine and I was surprised by how close we had been to each other.

I opened my mouth to say something but Harry cut me off.
"Listen Briar, I know we never classified what we were and maybe I should have. But I thought you genuinely liked me the way that I liked you. I'm sorry for reacting the way I did the other night and if after this you want to cut ties I'll let it be. I just won't be able to do that knowing I didn't try to work this out." He said quickly.

"Harry, I do feel the same way about you. I just" I trailed off, thinking about how to word it.
"My life is so complicated right now."

"And mine isn't?" He laughed. "Look I don't need to know the things about your life that you don't want me to know, I won't push it. Was the guy who called you the other night, your boyfriend?"
I shook my head.
"Okay, do I need to back off cause of this guy?"

I shook my head again, this time it was my turn to speak.
"Harry, I want to be with you but there are certain aspects of my life I just am not ready to talk about and I'm not sure when I will be. All I can do is tell you how I feel about you and go from there."

"Good enough for me."
Was all he said before crashed his lips onto mine.

Notes

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