Just as Much

Niall's POV

Saying goodbye to Erica is never fun, but this time it was different. Way different because she finally knows what I think of her. And I finally know how she thinks of me. I just can't quit smiling. Just being with her I feel different. We don't have to worry about being awkward, things just fall into place with us. I know she's real. I don't have to think that she's not here for me because she always has been.

It's really like the song, her hand fits in mine like it's made just for me.

I don't think I've ever smiled this big. And for this long. Like, my mouth hurts but I can't quit. I'm on the plane to Orlando right now, anxiously tapping my feet. I'm excited to get the album out, to preform the songs. But the thought of leaving Erica for a month already kills me. I didn't want to, it's taking everything I have to not just turn around and stay with her. Be her “house wife” while she goes to work. I can work on my cooking and cleaning. It would be kind of fun, thinking about it.

I wasn't spotted at her place. Thank god. I know we're both not ready for that. Not ready for the publicity. I don't want to hide her, but I don't want to throw her to the wolves yet either. I hope people will understand that this is what I want, that she is what I want. What I've wanted for years to be honest. People knew I was in New York City, and at the bar with friends but it never amounted to anything beyond that.

It's only a two hour flight. Just a little over two hours to be exact. I'll get in around midnight, the other guys will be arriving soon after. Sometimes I just sit back and can't help but think and wonder how the hell we even got here. I mean, releasing our fourth studio album, traveling internationally, I never thought we'd get this far. And I feel like we're just starting. I feel like we were just formed.

I enjoy flying, but flying by yourself is quite boring. I check and realize its around five am back at home, but I punch the familiar numbers in to call my mum anyway. I bring the phone to my ear and listen to it ringing.

“Hello? Niall?” Her groggy voice picks up, I know I woke her but I'm just antsy.

“Hi mum! Sorry I woke you up.”

“It's okay Niall, everything all right?” She asks as I hear the covers move, I'm assuming she's getting situated in bed. I hate waking her but sometimes it's the only time I can talk to her.

“Everything is great mum. I just wanted to call and catch up!” I'm just not tired. I'm cheerful and full of energy at the moment.

“Okay.” She drags the word out, waiting for me to say anything.

“So I came to New York early to see Erica.” My entire family has met Erica and loved her from the moment they met her. Dad always asks about her, Denise always wants to go shopping with her, Nan always wants to bake with her, mum always wants to talk to her. She just has everyone under her spell and she doesn't even try. Just this natural allure to her.

“Erica? Erica Crowe?” I can her by the sound of her voice that she's getting excited about the mere mention of it.

“Yes, that Erica.” I smile. I don't need to hide it here.

“Oh my Niall!” She squeals. “So what does this mean? What happened. Tell me everything.” She demands. I knew she would freak. But I'm not telling her everything, she doesn't need to know of our extra curricular activities.

“Well, so I went to see her before I went to Orlando and we finally just talked. Had everything out and I stayed at her place, in her cousins bed because he was gone.” I lie, but some things a mum just doesn't need to know. “Then we talked about everything, about us, I guess.” I itch the back of my head as I'm suddenly nervous. Admitting we're an us, or will be eventually.

“So are you officially taken off the market?” She's excited. Such a mom excited.

“Um, no we're not official. I want to take her out on a date when we got back to New York. And I want to spend New Years wit her.” I just have all these plans all the sudden. All these thoughts running through my head of things I want to do.

“Where are you going to take her? What are you getting her for Christmas?” Obviously mum is still excited.

“I haven't thought of it. Oh Jesus, what am I going to get her for Christmas mum?” Now I'm nervous. Damn it.

“I'll think of some things.” She volunteers.

“Okay, well we're going to land soon mum, I'll let you go for now. Remember to keep this all hush hush. I mean you can tell Nan, Dad, Greg and Denise, but no one else, please. We're not official and we haven't really even talked about an us other then the fact that we like each other so we need to keep it quiet.”

“Got it Niall. Text me when you land okay?” She will always be my mum.

“Will do, love you.”

“Love you too.” I hang up the phone and tap my feet to the song stuck in my head as I start to slightly hum.

We're only getting older baby

And I've been thinking about it lately

Does it ever drive you crazy

Just how fast the night changes

I pull my phone out to text Erica, the lyrics reminding me of her and how things between us have change in an instant.

To Erica: Miss you already.

I don't even care if I sound like a love sick puppy because I know I am. She responds quickly.

From Erica: Miss you too. Let me sleep.

I laugh at how frank she is. It is close to midnight so I know she's exhausted. This weekend has been crazy too. But I wouldn't have it any other way.
----------------------

“It went well. She's talking to me again.” I smile.

“Anything else?” Louis asks, winking, joining us in the hallway.

“You know I won't tell if anything did happen.” I like Erica, I don't need to brag about a “conquest” to anyone, even my best friends. They respect it, I don't ask personal details about Perrie, Eleanor, or Sophia so they won't ask about Erica. Plus they already know her, they know what she's about. It's nice to possibly date someone who I don't have to worry about the guys liking her because they already love her.

“Ah our little Niall is growing up!” Harry teases as he tousles my hair.

“All right, all right, all right.” I push them away. “That's enough.”

“But seriously Niall, what happened?” Harry asks as we sit down in the hotel room, the others have moved on to their rooms.

“Well I showed up, Ian was there but it turns out he's dating one of Erica's friends, and we just talked. We went out. I stayed at her place and then told her everything this morning. We hashed it all out.” I smile. I'm excited about the fact.

“So are you two dating then? Like she's your girlfriend finally?” He asks.

“No. We haven't figured all that out, I don't want to overwhelm her, I want to take her out when we tape SNL so right now we're just figuring things out.” I still can't wipe the smile off my face. “How are things with you and Jeanne?” I ask. It's a touchy subject with Harry. He's obsessive when it comes to her. Fallen head over heals.

“Um I wouldn't really know. I don't get her. It's all my fault, I can't control my emotions when I'm around her. I get jealous easily, I jump to conclusions, I just keep messing up.” He pulls at his neck, looking away from me. He's always avoiding the subject, you can see it in his face when you bring her up, on edge.

“Maybe it will all work out, look at Erica and I, it took three years.” I tell him. I tease him quite a bit about it but he's still my very good friend.

“Yeah we'll see.” He tightens his lips and looks ahead, already deep in thought.

Notes

Little Niall and his mama, little Narry. :) Everyone loves a mom that wants to know everything, we've all been there. And poor Harry. So hung up on Jeanne, I'm already assuming you all know what story I'm talking about but if you don't go check out @not_any_maryjane's story Dreaming Of You, it will explain a lot!

I just can't thank you all enough for all the positive comments, messages, votes, subscriptions, and reads. It means so much to me, knowing that my work is appreciated. Literally one chapter probably takes about an hour to write, not including editing and posting so thank you!

Happy Tuesday!!

xoxox