Just as Much

Erica's POV


Well, house to myself. Niall left for his tour a few days ago. It was harder then I thought to see him leave. I've never actually been there to say goodbye, I would just show up at his house and he wouldn't be there so I didn't notice the absence. I mean I would notice it but it didn't strike me as much as this did. I couldn't hide my sadness, I tried. But as I shut the front door I tasted my salty tears. So stupid.



I had my skype interview for the Historical Society and it went a lot better then I had thought. I won't know until next week if I got it or not but at least my nervousness made me funnier, they at least laughed when I did. This is finals week. I've been pulling my hair out to turn my essay in and finish up with exams. I just have two left.



Tonight Allison was coming over to have a girls night. I haven't gotten to hang out with her that much and now that Niall isn't here I like we can really just relax. It's weird being in his house without him here, but he keeps reminding me that this is my house now too. So weird to have him say that.



I've talked to my mom a few times. I've lied to her, saying that I've been staying at Allison's, the last thing I want my mom to know is that I'm actually staying with Niall. She'd have a heart attack she'd be so excited, and that is nothing I need.



I've already set out our popcorn and m&m's, a sweet and salty treat, nail polish, and other random things that Allison and I usually do during our girls nights. It sound's terrible, but I haven't left Niall's bed. He has no idea, but it still smells a bit like him so I've slept there. I'm fairly certain I'm pathetic but no one knows so I bask in my secret.



“Hey girl hey.” Allison laughs before I can even hear her. I've given her the code to the gate and unlocked the door so she can just come right in.



“Down here Allison!” I call out as I'm sitting in front of my dresser, re-folding some shirts that didn't fit in. I've taken to shopping to fill the time since the house is empty.



“What are you doing?” Allison flops on the bed.



“Just organizing. How was your day?”



“Oh jeez. We had finger painting today. What a fucking nightmare. Who ever seriously though giving three year old's paint for their fingers was a good idea, was an idiot.” I can't help but laugh. “So have you heard from lover boy yet?” She props herself up on her elbows, batting her eyelashes.



“No, and for the millionth time, he's not my lover boy.” I push the drawer shut and join her on the bed. “I really hope I get that internship. I need a fresh start.”



“What about me?” Allison feigns an upset face, she can be so dramatic sometimes.



“Not with you, you know what I mean. Meet a different guy, one that will magically fall in love with me and sweep me off my feet, make me forget about Niall..” I can only dream. I'll probably have my nose so far up books that I'll pass anyone by that even looks at me.



“Just don't think about it. Anyone would be so lucky to have you as a girlfriend. Niall is just missing out.” She bites her lip and sits up.



“Thanks.” I can't help but feel sad about the whole situation. I actually got excited when we slept in the same bed together and then when I heard what Luke had said, but I don't know what I thought would happen. He's said it a million times, we're just friends. The more wrapped up I get in him the worse things will get for me. That's why it doesn't help that I'm staying here, just out of options at the moment.



“Come on, I brought some films to watch. I need a new coat of polish on my nails too.” She smiles at me and pulls me off the bed, she's always good at trying to get me out of my funk.
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I wake up to a loud noise and quickly realize that Allison and I have passed out on the couch. Probably from too many sodas and candy, the tv still on. I search for my phone that stopped ringing and started back up again, finding it under a magazine. My breath hitches just a bit when I see Niall on the caller id. I silently squeal, careful not to wake up Allison. She can just stay here for a bit. I check the time and see it's close to 9:30, dang, we sure are crazy girls.



“Hey Niall.” I answer, walking away from Allison to my bedroom.



“Erica!” He's extremely chipper and excited, of course. “How's my favorite Erica?” Ok, might be drunk.



“She's good. How's Niall?” I ask, laughing.



“I'm not your favorite Niall?” He asks, sounding a little hurt. Such a good actor.



“What time is it there?” I ask curiously, changing the subject.



“It's 4:30, I haven't slept like all day. I'm wired.” He laughs at himself. So not drunk, just running on fumes.



“You have a show tonight?” I ask, sitting myself on the bed.



“We do! The fans down here are crazy, so loud. We can't get any sleep.” I fiddle with the hem of my shirt, he's never really called me when he's been away on tour. “How's the house?”



“House is good, still standing.” I laugh at my own terrible joke.



“So you miss me yet?” He asks and I just pause. This is just so different. I can't help but feel like he's next to me, my stomach erupting with butterflies at the sheer thought of him asking me if I miss him, of course I miss him.



“Yeah, the house is so quiet with you gone!” I try to sound cheerful and not longing like I feel. How someone has this power over me, I have no idea.



“I bet. I think you would love Lima. When we drove through it, I just saw all these old buildings and churches, I instantly thought of you and your odd obsession with history.” I can tell he's smiling. Who am I kidding, Niall is always smiling, it's not just because he's thinking about me. That's just his nature. I hear him mumble to someone else and I can't quite catch what he's saying.



“Whose that Niall?” I ask, hoping he hears me.



“Oh, it's Mark! He's yelling at me, telling me I need to get to a workout so we can head to the stadium.” I can hear him shuffling around with his things, probably throwing things like he usually does.



“Ok, well I'll let you go then. Don't be to hard on yourself with that knee. It took forever for you to quit being a baby about it.” I tease him.



“Oy! Be nice. See if I call you again Erica.” My heart drops just a bit. “I'm just kidding! I'll call you later! Bye Erie!” His new nickname makes me smile. At least he's thinking of me.



“Bye Ni!” I end the call and fall back on the bed, god I've got it bad. I can't help but think of when Niall had just gotten knee surgery and returned to his house, he usually had someone there to help him out with everything but occasionally I had to help him.



“Get up Niall! The doctor said you have to start walking on it, and you've got to head to Stamford Bridge to use their facilities.” I yell for what seems like the millionth time down the hall as I dramatically push the stray hairs out of my face.



“Erica! Come help me!” He whines, that is apparently his new normal voice as I roll my eyes but of course join him in his room to see a near naked Niall struggling to put shorts on.



“What are you doing?” I rush over to him, helping him balance himself before he fell over, he's not used to the crutches yet.



“I'm trying to get dressed so I can head to Chelsea.” He snaps at me and I narrow my brows at him. “Sorry, this is just so frustrating.”” He throws his shirt down. “And I have to drive myself because Alex canceled on me, he's got to be somewhere.” He gripes.



“I can drive you Niall, its no big deal.” I tell him, guiding him to sit down on the bed and help put his shirt on, along with his socks.



“You don't have to do that, besides I can't fit in your car, you'd have to drive the Rover.” His voice slightly muffled by the sound of his shirt.



“That's fine. And you should be wearing gym shorts, not sweatpants Niall. It will just be harder to change when you get there. Just put the shorts under the pants.” I throw him a pair of shorts as I look through his closet for his trainers.



“Thank you Erica.” I try to pick out matching ones for him as I know he likes to look coordinated, even if no one will see him. He's so metro sometimes.



“Now come on, just lean on me, the crutches will get easier the more you use them.” I help him up after I lace up his shoes, and have him lean against me as we walk down the hall. “I'll get you some water to take.” I lean him against the wall carefully and grab two water bottles out of the fridge, when I turn around I see him looking at me. “What?” He does this all the time.



“Nothing. I-I just love that you're here to help me. I can really count on you. I can't say that about a lot of people.” I try not to make my smile so big, controlling my suddenly anxious stomach.



“Well, that's what people should do. Be there to support each other right?” He nods and pulls himself upright. “Let's go.”




I've got it so bad for Niall.

Notes

Hey guys! So hopefully this time next week my laptop will be fixed and I can update more! I miss writing and updating more often!

So nothing has happened and Niall is now gone for tour, these two are not on the same page but it's still fun to write about, we'll get there, I promise! Just stick with me! :)

Thank you so much for all your wonderful comments, I love to see any feedback! And thank you to everyone reading, voting, and subscribing!!

Happy (??) Monday!!

xoxo