Stephanie's POV

Waiting for Harry to call feels like I'm waiting a lifetime. I need to know how he feels about this idea and whether or not we are on the same page. For some bizarre reason, I have a feeling he'll like the idea more than I do.
Spending Christmas with your ex isn't on many people's Christmas list, especially mine. It's confusing and continges to mess my head up, if that's still possible.
My phone starts to ring and I look to see his name displayed, I still get those butterflies from him. I sigh as I swipe the screen and answer,

"Hi." I say as I bite my lip.
"Hey.." He starts with a wary tone. "What's this about Christmas?" He asks jumping straight to the point. He doesn't even know, oh my, was I even supposed to say anything.
"My Mum told me that they've organised with your parents, for you guys to come over in the evening on Christmas day." I say as I nervously wait for his reaction, this is the opposite to how I thought the conversation would go.
"What?" Harry asks shocked and I don't say anything. "When did they decide this?" He asks annoyed.
"I've only just found out.." I sigh as I really wish I never text him now. "I thought you knew."
"Nope, I was never asked about going to yours. How do you feel about their idea?" He asks.
"It's not exactly the best idea, but I'll be fine." I say and he goes quiet.
"Okay. Well I need to go and speak to my Mum. I'll talk to you soon" Harry sighs and I close my eyes in regret.
"Okay " I sigh as we both hang up.
Oh shit.


I sit down on the floor, leaning my back on my bed and I let my head fall into my hands. I feel so gutted about his reaction. I thought he'd like it, I secretly wanted him to like it. I'm shocked he's annoyed and it has made me feel a bit shit in myself. This is where I'm driving myself insane, one minute I want his attention, the next minute I want to hide away from everyone. It sucks so badly and I can't seem to sort my head out.

I don't know what I'm expecting from Harry and I don't know what he's expecting from me. He's decided for us to be friends, but how exactly can that work? I suppose with us living in different cities the whole friends idea would be easier, but when he comes here I don't see how my head and heart is going to handle having him around as a friend.

I wish I could move on but he just pulls me in everytime I get a little further away. His words cause much more affect on me than he realises and I know that he's aware of what he does to me.

The night in London before I left his, I thought he was going to kiss me. I wanted to feel his soft perfect lips on mine again so badly. I wanted to feel like I did before. But I knew we couldn't have gave in, like I said to Niall; I would never have been disloyal to him. I may have had thoughts but I didn't turn them into actions.

---

Harry's POV

I quickly grab my rucksack and throw in some bits that I need. I haven't seen my Mum in a while and I am supposed to go and see her next weekend, maybe she will like the surprise of me randomly turning up.
It's not just Mum I want to see, If Stephanie wants to talk things out like she text me, then I'll have to see her too. Its about time things got sorted as it feels like we are just going round in circles. If she's really happy with Niall then I know I have no chance anymore. But I have to make her realise how I feel about her.
I put my coat on and I take my keys as I put them into my pocket for now. Slinging my rucksack over one shoulder, I text Liam and Louis letting them know what I am doing and when I am back.
That's it, I'm ready to go.

I open the front door and close it behind me. It feels weird going back home to Mum, but at the same time I'm excited. The only downfall of going home is the drive, it's not exactly fun driving on your own. The only thing I can rely on is the radio or the cd that was last left in there, I think I last listened to it properly when I was on the way to London with Stephanie.

-
The drive wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, luckily I missed all the rush hour traffic so I am a little earlier than I should be.
As I pull up outside Mum's, I can't help but smile as I anticipate her reaction. I hope Gemma is home too, it will be good to see her. I take my belt off and I step out, pulling my bag out with me. I quickly lock my car and before I can even knock on the front door, it's already opened and my Mum is looking at me with the biggest smile on her face.

"Honey, what are you doing here?" She smiles as she opens her arms and pulls me into a hug. I drop my bag and hug her back.

"I thought I'd surprise you.." I say as I pull away, I pick my bag up and follow her inside, closing the door behind me.

"Well it's a lovely surprise, you look so well Son." She says as we walk into the living room, I sit next to her and she turns to face me. "So how have you been?" She asks and I slouch down into the chair getting myself a little more comfortable.

"I've been okay thanks, how has everyone been here?" I ask and my Mum starts to explain that Gemma has met a guy, she looks pleased so I smile. I'm slightly curious to who my sister dates, even though I'm younger, I'm still protective.

"He seems lovely, we are meeting him tomorrow, will you still be here?" She asks and I smile with a nod.

"And how's Dad?" I ask. Luckily my Mum doesn't get uncomfortable whenever my Dad is mentioned, they still get on well enough to care about each other.

"Yeah he's okay, same old really." I nod at her response. "Shall I get us some drinks?" She asks as she stands up.

"Sure, I'll follow you in." I say as I stand up and walk into the kitchen with her. I love how everything is the exact same from when I left. I watch Mum fill the kettle up, but my eyes soon scan to our little reminder board on the wall by the back door, I smile as I walk up to it. On the calendar I read next weekend, Harry's coming home. Here's a few reminder dates for Mum but I'm not sure what they are for. Then there are the photos that have been pinned up here for years, ones of Gemma and I as babies, kids and teenagers. They've been there for as long as I can remember.

"So what makes you come here this weekend?" Mum asks as I look at her, she folds her arms whilst waiting for the kettle to boil.

"Well, I thought it was be good to just surprise you and I sort of need to see Stephanie too." I say and Mum starts to smile. "She mentioned about christmas." I say and her smiles soon turns into a wary look.

"Oh.." Mum says and she lets her arms fall. "Harry, I was supposed to talk to you about it next weekend. You don't have to go over theirs in the evening if you don't want too." she adds and I look away. "You make your own decisions."

"I know, I was just shocked that's all. " I answer as I watch her make us some coffee. "I will go over, even though it's weeks away yet, I don't know why you're all arranging it so soon." I add and Mum laughs.

"Because some of us like to be organised Harry. Anyway, it wasn't something we had to decide it was just something that we thought of doing but we knew to ask you and Stephanie first." Mum answers and I nod as I knew that's how she would feel.

"And Dad is happy to go over too?" I ask and she nods as she passes me my coffee. I thank her as we walk back into the living room.

"Dad is fine about it, he gets on well with them as well. It's just something different and we thought it would be nice" Mum smiles as she sits down.

"Yeah." I say as there isn't much for me to say back to her. If they are happy doing that then good on them, they're old enough to make their own decisions and choose to do whatever they like.

"So what's going on with Stephanie?" She asks as she sips her coffee.

"I don't know, I'm going to pop round there in a minute, I feel like I need answers. I can't keep thinking I'm going to get her back, when she's seeing someone else. It's not fair on all of us and I just want things to be sorted once and for all. You know?" I say and my Mum nods as she looks at me.

"Susan said she came and saw you, Stephanie hasn't been her usual self, they've all been worried, I'm so proud you managed to help her. I just hope she manages to turn herself back around." Mum says as she looks away, I know she cares about Susan and her kids, but no one cares or loves Stephanie the way I do.

"Well I told Susan everything I knew." Is all I can say. Speaking about Steph just makes me want to see her. "I've loved Stephanie for so long, I don't think I know how not to love her. I suggested to be friends with her which was just stupid. I don't know how to be friends with her." I admit and Mum smiles sympathetically,

"Once you've fallen in love, that's it. It's very hard to ignore those feelings and to be something you know you can't be. Friends is very hard, unless there is no history and no hidden desire." She answers and I can't help but agree with her. She's summed it up perfectly.

"I know, but when she's moved on with someone else, what can I do?" I ask and Mum looks away as she thinks.

"I don't think she's moved on Harry. By what Susan has told me, she's just a little lost and seeking love from someone else." Mum answers. I lean forward and put my coffee on to the table.

"Mum, I think I need to leave and see her." I say as I stand up. Mum looks at me surprised and stands up too.

"Harry, think about what you want from Stephanie. Make your mind up so you know what you are going in for." Mum says warily and I look at her as we walk to the door.

"I just want her back Mum." I sigh and she nods as I open the door.

"Well, I hope you get her." Mum says and I quickly thank her as I jog towards my car. I look at Mum as I wave and get in the car.

Notes

I'm so sorry this chapter is short,
I've been struggling with writers block for a few days!
But,
I've had an idea for a while for a story that I feel quite passionate about. I've put the first preview chapter up and it's called Abstruse so check it out and let me know what you think.
I'm not giving up on this story, don't worry!
I've been writing more chapters for Harry and Stephanie too!
xx