The Law of The Jungle

The day of the wake had finally come. It was not a day I was looking forward to. It would just make everything harder. I didn't want people coming up to me and telling me they were sorry. They didn't kill my father. I know who did.

I didn't realize it at first. It all made sense however. It was Liam. The mauling had to have been from a wolf. Liam had tried to kill me too. Even if my dad had nothing to do with this whole thing, he was still a target. Liam knew how close I was to my father. If he was trying to break me, he knew just how to do it.

"I can't do this," I sniffled.
Ashton sighed, "yes you can, I'll be right here,"
He held his hand out. I slowly took it and curled my fingers around his. The familiar warmth radiated from his body, and circulated through my veins. He gave me a small hug.

Family I did not want to see started to appear. I hadn't seen half of them in a while. They pretended to care, but I knew they didn't really. They tried to hug me and say hello, but other than that they let me be. It was just easier that way. If Ashton were not here, I would be worse off then I was when I found my dad dead.

I'd have to be physically torn apart. I could see the scenario in my mind clearly. They would let me kneel infront of the casket to say my prayers and last words. I'd break down, screaming and yelling for him to come back. Begging for answers as to why he had to go. Then, I would be forcibly removed and taken home.

My dad knew me better than I knew myself. He was always happy and he loved talking to people. It didn't matter if you were just some random cashier in a store, or he knew you his entire life, he was nice to everyone. He put up with all my antics and shenanigans. He knew the real me that people barely saw.

The 4 hours were absolutely brutal. I never understood why wakes had to happen. They aren't necessary. All they do is put more financial stress on the family. Plus, when someone you love dies, the last thing you want is to stand by their casket for 4 hours straight while people you don't even know come and try to make you talk about it.

I just wanted to stop thinking of it. It just got me worked up. Each thought brought on a fresh round of tears. Well at least, it would have. Ashton was keeping me calm. I don't know how he did what he did, make me feel whatever he wants. Whenever I would start to freak out it would feel warmth and my muscles would relax and I would feel tired.

~*~

The funeral was worse. I couldn't even watch as they buried his casket. It had to be the worst day of my life to date. I didn't even know what to do when I got home. Ashton had done a great job of distracting me, but I couldn't forget something so etched into my mind like that.

In other news, Ashton told me that I looked beautiful. I didn't think it was really my best day looks wise. It was easy to see how much I'd been crying in the past couple of hours. More than I thought possible really. The only reason I slept was because of Ashton. He was being the sweetest.

Last night, the same day of the funeral, I crawled into his bed when I couldn't sleep in my own. It was becoming pretty common by now. Of course he didn't mind. He always welcomed me with open arms. I fell right to sleep with vivd dreams.

*her thoughts on the dream*

I was standing in the middle of the Forrest. It was that big opening where I first saw Ash in his wolf form. I remember all of the boys being there, both Liam's group and our group. They were fighting. I wasn't fighting though, I was standing at the opening and just watching. Liam and Ash were fighting. I could tell because they were both the black wolves. But I couldn't tell which one was which.

One of the black wolves pinned the other and bit it's neck. The second was fighting and making the most anamalistic noises I could think of. I remember screaming and trying to run over. It was Ashton. His green eyes were pained as he laid on his side helplessly. The other wolf, which was Liam, backed off. I fell to my knees beside Ashton and cried.


"Elle,"
I gasped for air. My eyes shot open and Ashton was awake. He was looking down at me concernedly. I had been crying in my sleep.
"It was just a dream baby," he whispered.

"It was horrible," I sniffled, "I thought you d-died,"
He sighed, "it's not real, I'm right here,"
He held out his hand, but that wasn't enough for me. I sat up and clung onto his torso. He was still here. He was still alive. I put my ear over his heart. It was still beating.

"You're so tense," he mumbled, "that must have been really bad,"
I nodded, "I was so scared. I didn't want to lose you too,"
"You're not going to," he swore, 'I'll always be here for you,"

Notes

OMG a month. I didn't even realize it was that long ago! Oops! Sorry it's short, but I'm not supposed to be on my ipad so I could get into lots of trouble if I get caught! It's also late and I need to sleep now. I have english and chem midterms tomorrow, then I'm free! Woo

mhch love
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