Triggered

I haven't been on a first date in years! I dated Greg for almost two years and when I was with him, I knew I never really needed to dress to impress. He knew me, and he claimed he loved me. Harry on the other hand... Harry was somewhat of a stranger I happened to find super attractive. I needed to dress to impress now even though he said not to nice. Nothing I ever wear is to nice... so that's a bonus I guess. Normally I would wear a tank-top with a zip up gray jacket to cover up my scars... yes I used to cut. I haven't done it lately, and thankfully I haven't really thought about doing it again. I was sober and I planned on staying that way for a long, long, long, time.

Where was I?

Oh yeah... what to wear! I would top off the tank-top and jacket with a pair of boot cute jeans. I guess I could wear that, not to fancy but not to plain. I looked at my clock and groaned as it said 7:00. I had wasted thirst minutes trying to figure out what the fuck i was going to wear! God dammit, I am a fucking wreck. Why the hell did Harry wanna take me out? Did he wanna see how fucked up I really was? Well if he did... he was about to get his wish. Quickly I through on my clothes and pulled my copper hair back in a high pony tail. Feeling the tips of hit tickle that back of my neck. A groan fell from my lips as a couple strands from my bangs fell from the pony tail and waved in front of my eyes. Teasing me. I pulled it behind my ear and looked into the mirror.

Yup... you look like complete and utter shit.

My blue eyes looked so dull and I noticed dark bags forming under them. I couldn't quite remember the last time I had slept a good night sleep. Maybe the night before I caught my boyfriend cheating. Yeah... that's it. I noticed a large scar peeking out over my chest and I quickly zipped my coat up higher, making it invisible. Another act of my mentally unstable step dad. Beating me to death wasn't the beginning of it. When I was 10, he took a knife to me. Cut a deep long wound in my chest, and somehow I was able to keep it from my mother. She still doesn't know to this day what he did to me when I was 10. The scar on my chest wasn't the only mark he gave me. My hand traveled over to my covered thighs. He slashed my thighs as well, with a X. I was ruined, and on top of that I ruined myself by self harming myself, on top of everything else he did to me. I was a ruined mess and it was all his fault. All those times I tried to commit suicide... all those times I swallowed mouth fulls of pills. The time I held a hand gun to my head with every intention of ending it. I wasn't able to do it. The pills never worked and my finger never seemed to be able to pull the trigger. I was so pathetic, I wasn't even able to end my own life. My thought we're interrupted by my door bell. It was exactly 7:30 sharp, and I rushed downstairs swinging the door open.

My mouth hung open at what I saw. Harry was dressed nicer than ever before. He wore a plaid button up shirt that was only button partially so it exposed some of his chest. Again I noticed dark ink sprawled over his chest and my interest peeked once again, wondering what his tats looked like. Not only that, what his chest looked like. A black pair of skinny jean adorned his lower half, and only then did I noticed how fabulous his legs were. They may be even nicer than mine. Was that just a tad bit weird. "Whoa." I muttered, then my eye widened as I realized I had said that out loud. SHIT!

"I was about to say the same thing love. You look beautiful" His voice emphasized the word beautiful and I felt my face flush red "Don't look away when you blush... your cuter when you blush."

"Styles... stop trying to kill me." I groaned, hiding my face.

he chuckled and I heard a ruffled and a sweet smell hit my nose. I looked up and I realize he was holding out a bouquet of flowers. Mostly bright red roses, but to spice it up I noticed a couple of poppy's and other flowers I had no clue what their names were. "Harry." was all I could say. Never once had I ever gotten flowers... and it made my face flush like crazy.

"You like them?"

I nodded in aw "Of course... their magnificent."

"I'm glad you like them. Let go find a vase to put them in and we can head out, yeah?"

I nodded again and followed him into the kitchen. My eyes narrowed as he pulled out a vase from under the sink and filled it with hot/cold water, holding his hand out for the flowers. I didn't want to give them... but I gave in. He set them in the vase and put it in the middle of the kitchen table, making the room glow so much brighter. "There we go. Adding a little light to this room."

I giggled and admired the flowers once more, before I felt a hand grab mine. I couldn't help but flinch at the sudden contact and then I relaxed as I realized it was only Harry. He was pulling me outside again, grabbing his leather jacket from the couch on our way out. "Where are we headed?" I asked him.

He gave me a sly smile "You'll just have to wait an see."

"Ugh, I hate surprises." I whined.

"But you've never had a surprise from me." He offered me a wink and I took it in with another flush of my cheeks.

I had to say

I was a tiny bit frightened.......

Where were we gonna go?

Notes

I think the lack of sleep is getting to me..... every time I drink my coffee I have a weird feeling I'm like drinking a spider or something. Only because I put my Coffee mug on my dresser and there is a big ass spider web on the plant beside it..... so yeah, I'm paranoid. But whatever... I hope my lack of sleep isn't making my writing any less terrible xD If it does please let me know. COMMENT, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE!!! MUCH LOVE!!!

Bye!

xXMadiXx