Attached at the hip.

*Savannah's POV*

The past few days have been absolutely crazy, we have been on the road non-stop and I have been spending a lot of time focusing on school. Although things have been looking up for Liam and I, the pain still hasn't gone away...it still gets to me when I'm all alone, or when nobody is there to distract me. The last time I cut was during they boy's show last night....I know I promised El I wouldn't, but it's not that easy. When you feel as low and hurt as I do, sometimes the physical pain is more bearable than the emotional...Liam still doesn't know, or I don't think he does, I haven't worn shorts so I should be good, but yeah. Right now the guys are doing sound check and I'm taking a break from all the studying.

I walk from the back room towards the couches in the front, and when I pass the bunks I notice Liam's phone still on his bed. He told me I could look at it, and I can't help myself...I need to see what happened...I grab his phone and type in my birthday, isn't that cute? I think it is. I click on the messages icon and scroll down to the phone number without a name, this must be Danielle. I open the messages and scroll up to the day it happened.

Liam: Hey(:

Danielle: Hey, I'm surprised to hear from you

Liam: Yeah, I'm sorry about how everything went down..you're in Washington right?

Danielle:Yeah why?

Liam: I miss you, like a lot, do you wanna meet up and hang out or something?

Danielle: I don't know if Savannah would like that...

Liam: So? She out hanging out with some dude so what does it matter?

Danielle: Really? I never pegged her as that type...Shame

Liam:Yeah, me neither... she claims he's gay and has a boyfriend, but I don't buy it.

Danielle: So you think she is cheating on you? I don't think she would lie about someone being gay...

Liam:Basically, but whatever. look, we got into a fight and I need to get my mind off of her, can we meet up?

Danielle: Sure, I can get your mind off of her ;) meet me at the starbucks on smith street.

At this point I've read all I can stand. I close the messages and throw his phone back on his bunk. I can't do this. He sincerely thought I cheated. He missed Danielle a lot. He knew what she was insinuating and he went anyways. Where is a good distraction when I need it? I grab my blade and head into the bathroom. I shut and lock the door and start cutting. I have to many scars, its like a million little scratches covering my upper thighs. But it helps take away the pain. I eventually run out of spaces on my thighs so I cut on my hip, nobody will see that...

Next thing I know I hear a knock on the door "Savannah, are you in there?" Niall asks

"Y-yeah" I mumble through my tears and try to contain them.

"Are you okay love?" Niall asks and I don't answer "Savannah, what's wrong? Open the door" Niall says obviously worried I clean myself up as much as I can and get up wipe my tears and open the door. I don't make eye contact with Niall and he can see somethings wrong, as I walk past he grabs my arm "Savannah talk to m-" He stops mid word and looks at my leg, the blood started going through my jeans "Sav- you're bleeding..." he says "Let me see" he says and I shake my head "What happened?" he presses.

"Nothing. I'm fine" I say but my tears say otherwise.

"Y-you did this to yourself?" he asks and when I don't respond he gets his answer "Savannah, please, we need to clean you up" he says

"I can do it" I say softly and go back to the bathroom. I stop the bleeding and wrap my leg and hip in gauze then come back out. This time, not only is Niall here, but a livid Liam. Shit. Niall told him. I just stand there wide eyed staring at both of them until Liam speaks.

"Niall...Savannah and I need a moment" he says and takes my arm and leads me to the back room. "Show me" he manages to choke out, he is a mixture of pissed and hurt, he is on the verge of tears. I start to protest but he wont have it. "Savannah, show me now." he says flatly and I know there is no use in protesting, I slide off my pants and take off the gauze and bandages,as soon as he sees a tear falls. "How the hell could you be so stupid?!" he yells. I hate when Liam yells at me "Are you insane?! What were you thinking?! You know that is no way to handle shit, I can't believe you would go back to that, how'd you even get a blade? Why are you doing this?! Did I cause this? Oh my gosh I caused this..." he starts off yelling and then his voice softens when he realizes why. As soon as he raised his voice at me, I broke down again, and once he is calm he just walks over and engulfs me in a hug "Shhhh baby, I'm sorry, I am so so sorry babe, please, please stop this. I will do anything, if you will stop this baby. You don't need this. You don't need to cut" he says and kisses my forehead.

"I-I'm sorry, it's just s-so hard" I say and keep crying "I act like I'm fine because I want to be, I want us to be normal again. I don't want to be hurt anymore. I don't want to be depressed. I don't want to worry about Danielle. And I don't want you to worry about me cheating on you" I manage to get out through my tears. Liam just continues to hold me and I just cry into his shoulder.

"I know baby, I know you wouldn't and I am so sorry I did this to you" he says and rubs my back "Why don't you just talk to me? Let me know when you're feeling like this" he says softly and I shrug "Promise me, from now on, no more cutting, okay baby? I want you to go get your blade and give it to me okay?" he says and I don't move "Savannah, go get your blade." he says starting to get angry, I swear sometimes he acts like my father, he didn't get the name daddy direction for no reason. I sigh and get up, I go and grab my blade and hand it to him, thankfully no one was in the bus because I'm in my underwear.

I come back and hand the blade to Liam, he looks over all of my cuts and helps me with my bandages, and then I put my pants back on, and we go and cuddle on the couch. He holds me tight in his arms until he has to go get ready for the show. He goes to the dressing rooms and makes me go with him, he told me there is no way in hell he is leaving me alone now. greatttttt. I sit on the couch in the dressing room while they get ready, I'm so exhausted from studying, and all the crying etc. that has happened today that I pass out on the couch.

When I finally wake up I look at the clock, 8:30, the show has started, Lou is sitting in one of the boys' chairs. I get up and we make our way to the side of the stage to watch, I also pull out my phone to check my twitter. I see that Liam has tagged me in a post.

@Real_Liam_Payne: Caught bae sleeping, isn't she cute when she sleeps?

and he attached a picture of me on the couch asleep, oh Liam....I'll have to get him back for that

For the remainder of the concert Lou and I watch the boys preform, Lux is asleep on a couch just behind us and we make small talk, I know Liam told her, but she probably doesn't want to make me uncomfortable so she doesn't bring it up. When the concert finally ends and the boys come off the stage I am greeted first by a very sweaty Liam. He pulls me close and kisses me deeply. I smile against his lips "Well hello to you too" I say with a laugh and smile at him. "You were great tonight" I whisper against his lips and then am pulled away by Harry.

"Liam! Sharing is caring, some of us would like to see Savannah too" he says and pulls me into a hug

"Oh Haz" I say with a smile and hug him

"Are you okay love?" he whispers and I nod "If you need to talk I'm here, we all are" he whispers before I am pulled into another hug by Niall, then Louis, then Zayn, they all said things along those lines, Liam needs to learn not to tell everyone...

We go onto the bus and all the boys take their showers, I talk with Lou and play with Lux some, God I love this child, well any child, but especially Lux. I am playing patty cake with her when Liam and the rest of the boys are finally all showered and ready for dinner. We go to this little causal diner and all squeeze into one booth. I order a short stack of pancakes and leave it at that, they are pure carbs and I shouldn't be eating them, but I won't eat much anyways, these diet pills really stop me from being hungry, and I am loosing weight, not much, but it's not a fast process. I've lost about 10 pounds I think.

The food gets here and Liam notices I'm not eating much "Babe, you love pancakes, whats wrong?" he asks me and wraps his free arm around my waist.

"Nothing, I'm just not hungry" I shrug and he gives me the 'how stupid do you think I am?' look "I'm seriously not, I had a snack on the bus" I lie.

"Lou, did Savannah have a snack on the bus?" Liam asks and I am about ready to smack him, he is bringing unnecessary attention to this

"No, not that I saw, why?" she asks curiously

"Oh no reason" he says and turns to me "Why'd you lie to me? What are you hiding?" he asks softly so the others don't hear .

"I just don't want you to worry babe, I'm fine okay? I cant help it if I'm not hungry" I say and take a bite of my pancake "Happy?" I ask with a bit of annoyance in my voice.

"Very" He says sarcasticly and I sigh, I hate when we are like this with each other, I don't like arguing with him. I'm doing this for him but whatever.

"If you all will excuse me I think I need some air" I say and stand up from the booth, thankfully I was on the outside of the booth. I get up and walk outside the diner and lean against the van. I sigh knowing Liam will be out here sooner or later because we 'need to talk'

Sure enough, about two minutes later an annoyed Liam comes to the side of the van "What was that?!" He asks me rather angry I sigh and close my eyes so he doesn't see me roll them. I'm tired of his attitude tonight, and I am still kinda mad that he told the boys what happened.

"Why are you acting like this?" he asks "It's not like you to be so-" He stops mid word, we both know what he was going to say, but I wanted to hear him say it.

"Be so what?" I ask and he sighs defeated.

"Look, Savannah, I just, I hate when we are like this, I'm just worried about you" he says and rests his hand next to my hand as he stands in front of me

"Yeah well don't be." I say

"Did I do something else? Are you about to start your period or something?" He ask and I shake my head, seriously? blaming my period?

"Yes Liam I am mad at you for something else. You went and told the boys, lou, everyone about what happened. The didn't need to know that happened,it's bad enough that Niall saw."

"Well exuse me for being worried about you! I told them because I wanted them to be sure and look out for you, I'm sorry I'm a concerned boyfriend. I love you to much to almost loose you again, and you can be mad at me all you want, but I did it because I care." he says.

I look at him and sigh, he really doesn't understand privacy does he? I just need to lay down, this whole working it out thing isn't easy. "I'm going to go lay down" I say and start to walk away

"Don't you walk away from me!" he calls out and I pause but don't turn around

"Liam I need to think and rest, I'll just be in thye bus, don't worry you took my damn blade so I wont be cutting"

"Think about what?" he calls out again and I sigh

"Us" I say softly and walk onto the bus.

Notes

Hey y'all! Sorry it has taken so long to update, things have really been crazy, I am going to try to get another chapter p tonight but I'm not sure if that will happen or not. Please comment and let me know what you think and have a great day!