Troubled

My eyes fluttered open like delicate wings of a bird as I tried to adjust to the bright sunlight which I hadn't seen since the day Alejandro kidnapped me. The soft, white sheets around my body felt like clouds as I lay peacefully in my bed. The soft beat of my heart was mixed with his snoring, loud like roaring. I always hated when people snored, but Zayn's snoring was, believe me or not, like music. It meant that I was home. It made me giggle as I listened to him, completely vulnerable and unaware of everything.

Giggling into my pillow, I turned my head around to look at my man. His mouth was open, long, curly eyelashes almost resting on his cheeks. The hair on his head rested against his temple and forehead, and I reached up to brush them away gently, careful not to wake him up.

He was the devil, but he looked like an angel to me.

Zayn's snoring grew louder every time he took a breath in, then he'd clear his throat and start snoring again, starting very quietly and ending very loudly. I giggled and covered my mouth quickly. Zayn frowned and stirred, closing his mouth for a moment. I calmed down and then he started snoring again.

A grin spread across my lips as I watched him and listened to the horrible sounds leaving his mouth. I would never had guessed that snoring could be so amusing.

Zayn snored very loudly and his lips parted wider; and that was my breaking point. I burst out laughing, my head pressing against his chest as I giggled so hard that my stomach started to hurt.

Eventually, Zayn grew quiet and I felt a familiar hand on my head, petting my hair and combing my curls.

"Why are you laughing?" He asked in a very raspy, morning voice which I found the sexiest thing ever.

"You- " I tried to speak but I couldn't stop laughing. He chuckled against me even though he didn't know what was going on.

"Angelaaaa," he whined, "Tell me."

I peered up at him with my fingers curled under my eyes and against his chest. His sleepy eyes looked down at me and he smiled dreamily.

"Your snoring is very funny," I responded, giggling again and rubbing my nose against his ribs.

"What? I do not snore!" he grimaced and looked around the room as if he was questioning himself.

"Oh, yes you do!" I bit my lip and the corners of my lips twitched up in a smile. Zayn scoffed and frowned hard, shaking his head as if he didn't want to believe my words.

"No..." he whispered to himself, looking away from me. Was he embarrassed?

"Is my bad, gang leader embarrassed?" I grinned, moving my body over his so I was lying on top of him with my chin resting on his chest.

"I'll show you embarrassed..." he growled and rolled us over, nuzzling his head in the crook of my neck and biting gently but possessively.

"Okay, boss! I'm giving up."

"Of course you are," he grinned with his tongue sticking out between his teeth. I pulled his head down and kissed him slowly. He grabbed my hips and groaned lowly, in the back of his throat.

"Good morning, handsome," I winked, peppering sweet kisses over his jaw, the stubble on his skin tickling me.

"Good morning," he rasped, leaning into my touch.

"Ugh, I need to shave," he growled and nuzzled his chin in my neck so I could feel his stubble on my skin.

"What? No!" I gasped, pulling him away from my neck so I could look at him. His dark brown eyes were confused as he stared down at me.

"No...I love your stubble," I mumbled, tracing my knuckles across his jaw, "It's so sexy and manly."

Zayn stared at me for a moment before he started chuckling, shaking his head as his whole body shook with laughter. "Women and their brains."

"What? Well this just means that you don't have to shave every morning, idiot," I rolled my eyes and felt his grip on my hips tighten again.

"I dare you to repeat that," he hissed, his face so close to mine.

"Zayn," I whined, "You're turning me on."

"No bunny. Not now," he shrugged apologetically and pushed himself off me. Climbing back towards the headboard, I leaned back against the metal to watch him do his morning routine.

Zayn pulled his skinny jeans on, threw a navy blue t-shirt over his muscular torso and pushed his hair back to form a quiff. He put black socks on his massive feet then strolled into the bathroom.

"Don't you need a shower?" I yelled from my position in bed.

"I showered last night! Too lazy to shower again!"

I waited for him to come out, thinking about everything what had happened to us. The scars on my face and body were still present, healing, but still there as a reminder of horrible things Alejandro had done to me. To us. I'd almost lost Zayn. A shiver ran down my spine when the image of him lying in his own blood crossed my mind. I don't want to see him hurt ever again. I don't know how I managed to stay...strong.

"Get up, breakfast," he clapped his hands and walked out of the room. Sighing loudly, I got out of the bed and grabbed Zayn's striped, black and white t-shirt, pairing it with my black leggings. I pulled a pair of black socks and rushed into the bathroom to wash my face. I didn't need a shower, either. When I was finished, I dragged my feet out of the bedroom and to the kitchen.

Zayn was sitting close to the window with a cigarette between his cranberry red lips, sucking the dirty smoke inside of his lungs as if his life depended on it. I watched his face as he smoke. His big eyes would squint whenever he took a drag, his lips would look fuller and redder. I knew that it wasn't good for his health, but it was a fine sight watching my man with stubble smoking and thinking about something.

"Wanna eat?" I asked, walking across the kitchen and towards the oven.

He stopped smoking for a second to nod at me, then he turned his head to look out of the window.

I decided to leave him with his thoughts as I prepared breakfast; omelette with cheese, orange juice and toast. I set the table and placed the plates in front of my man and me, then I remembered Erin.

"Erin!" I called, sitting down opposite Zayn and looking at the doorway, waiting for my best friend to walk in every moment.

"She's not here. She left with Niall," Zayn shrugged and destroyed his cigarette in an ashtray, moving it away from the table.

I almost screamed from happiness for Erin. She was a crazy, bubbly girl, ready to do any kind of insane thing. But that was her mask. Deep down, she was an emotional girl who craved love. Who craved someone like Niall to put up with her.

I just thought that they were perfect together. Even though it was exhausting to watch them fight over the silliest things, I loved the way he challenged her, just how she challenged him. Their relationship was somehow playful, despite the fact that sometimes they wanted to rip each others' heads off.

"Oh. Okay," I smiled softly and took a bite of omelette. Delicious.

"This is so good," Zayn mumbled and I immediately remembered when I cooked for him for the first time. I knew that he didn't mean to shout at me and hurt me, but that was an awful experience. I almost swore not to cook for him ever again.

"I'm glad you like it. How's Barbara?"

Zayn chewed and shrugged, "She's home, I think. Ready to give a birth. I'm just waiting for the moment her stomach would burst open."

I covered my mouth and giggled, causing him to smile at me. "She won't. She'll have a lovely baby, I hope. But don't you think Mike needs to know? I mean, how would you feel if you were about to become a father and you didn't know anything about it?"

Zayn choked on his food and took a sip of juice. His eyes widened like tennis balls and he looked away from me. "He knows. I told him."

I frowned and stared at him. He stared back with a glint of anger in his green, diamond-like eyes.

"Does Barbara know?"

"I talked to her. She was mad at first but I convinced her that it was the best. Mike was in shock the whole time. Then he ran to Barbara and I don't know anymore... I think he's taking care of her right now."

"That's great. He's gonna be an amazing father, I know that."

Zayn didn't say anything and he continued eating. I knew this was a sensitive topic for him, but I just had to ask.

"Do you want to be a father? Ever?"

He stopped chewing and stared at the table with his jaw clenching hard. He looked up at me with his cat green eyes and I almost flinched from how angry and dangerous they looked.

"What?" he spat.

"I mean...not now, of course. One day..."

"Do you seriously think I'd be a father?" he laughed, but it wasn't from happiness. It was from bitterness.

"You'd be the best father ever, Zayn. I know you don't want to even hear about it, and that's okay. I understand. But I don't want you to think so bad of yourself," I whispered, taking his hand in mine.

"You'd be a protective, caring father. And your kids would love you."

Zayn remained silent as he stared down at our entwined fingers. The white gold of my father's ring on his finger felt cool against my skin, and I smiled when I remembered how happy I was for giving it to him.

"Thank you, Angela," he cleared his throat and removed his hand to continue eating.

The topic of being a father was terrifying for him, just like for every other man. But I was surprised how well he took it. Honestly, I was expecting him to get mad, but he was very calm as he finished breakfast.

"I'm gonna visit Barbara and Mike right now," I informed him and finished my orange juice. Standing up, I collected our empty plates and glasses, walking with them to the sink and cleaning them right away. Zayn lit another cigarette.

"You wanna come?" I turned around and dried my hands with a cloth. Zayn looked up at me from his seat and nodded, the smoke flying from his mouth into the air.

"Okay. I'll go change."

I decided to put on a pair of denim jeans, Converse shoes since the weather was nice, and Zayn's sweater. I tied my bright hair in a high, messy ponytail and applied some makeup. Lining my eyes with black kohl eyeliner, I brushed my eyelashes with mascara and dusted my cheek bones with a little bit of blush.

Zayn waited for me patiently, and when I re-entered the kitchen, he stood up and put the pack of his Marlboro cigarettes in the pocket of his jeans. I assumed that his lighter was already in the box.

"Let's go," he murmured and grabbed his car keys, walking behind me and out of the apartment.

Notes

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