S.O.S.

The walls seemed to taunt me, laughing because I would never have her back. The pictures of our faces scattered everywhere. The tiny slivers of space between them, and the big blanks as you moved further.

Something about the utter lack of photos in our bedroom clicked in my head. It had never bothered me that we had no pictures on the walls in here. We had them in every room but our bedroom.

I let out a short sigh, planting my feet on the floor and leaving the blank walls. Nothing in this house was comfortable, everything was her. Even though she hadn't been here for so long, she was everywhere. It was time for a change. I pulled out boxes from the hall closet, stacking them next to the front door. The first of many photos to come was placed neatly in the corner of the box, immediately followed by the next. Tiny tears left my eyes as I thought back on the photos, reminiscing old times when all was well. The box filled quickly, the next being pulled to my hip as I inched through the house. The walls were empty without the pictures, but I was filled with a newfound confidence, the kind you get when you do something you've been putting off for far too long.

The closer I got to finishing with one room, the easier it was to breath , and by the time I had finished with half the pictures, the sun had set, and everything was dark. Looking back on the emptiness of everything, I felt a twinge of pain. I had never been much for emotional confrontation, and yet here I stood, confronting what I thought would surely snap me in two. Change. Change terrified me.

April was such a huge part of my life, and without her, everything was spiraling around aimlessly with no way of getting back to the way it was. No, it wasn't going back to how it was, that is behind me, and It's time I started to move on. Not, by any means, forget April, no. But move something new onto the stove top, put her on a back burner. I would not let her burn, but I couldn't keep investing time into the dead end that was us. She wasn't comign abck, and I had just realised that.

I also just realised I hadn't visited her in the last twenty-four hours, and I was just fine.

Notes