Black Tears

Alyssa's POV
I stand in front of the bathroom mirror. All this make up..these clothes...the way I have to act on stage...is horrible. I have no one. No friends.Just my mom. But she hates my guts.She hates me so much. She's told me to my face that she wishes I'd burn in Hell..

Could you imagine..hearing that from your own mother? I didn't expect to hear it, so yeah..it hurts. Trust me.I would know. My dad was never in my life. I don't know him.Well, I know him but not personally. I know his name, and what he looks like.That's it.Did I want to be like this? No. I wanted to finish school, go to college, get a good job, a husband, kids..but I won't. i didn't finish high school. I'm a drop out. I barely can afford my apartment I have.

I make good money, but I have to eat. My rent is about 200 a month. But then i got the bills. I sigh to myself as I stare in the mirror. The lip stick cloaked onto my lips. The eye liner thick. The mascara bold and my eye shadow glittery. I look down at my self. My boobs barely supported by this crop top. My ass hanging out the back of this skirt.

My heels taller than I am.Okay, well about 7 inches. And covered in glitter.This isn't me.I'm a nerdy girl. I like to wear comfy clothes and my glasses..these contacts hurt my eyes.I shrug and pick up my duffel bag, with my actual clothes in it. I walk out of the back entrance after calling a cab.

The cab pulls up and i get in.I give the man my apartment complex address.He nods and begins to drive. I look out the mirror as he drives a fair speed down the road. The lights flash by. The car's speed pass. The walking people seem to by running, but its because of the cab's speed.
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''Thank you.''I mumble and hand the man the tip.He smiles and he drives away once I get in the lobby. The host smiles at me.He's always at that little podium ready to give any one information about the place. ''Nice pay day?''He asks me with a kind smile..''As always.'I mumble as I walk past him.

The elevator stops and I walk out and start my way down the hall.I pass a woman in her mid thirties with two little kids, a girl about 14, and a boy my age.She looks at me in disgust, her son winks but I act like I didn't see it.

I open the door and shut it and lock it after throwing my bag across the room. It slides across the floor and hits the side of the couch.I walk to my room and open the door. I sit on my bed and kick the heels off.

I pull the top off and change into a shirt. I take the skirt off but don't put anything on, well some panties. I walk into the kitchen.Time to cleam..great.I walk over to the radio on the counter and I turn it on.I put my CD in and hit play.

Thank god for Def Leppard. That's how I survive.

Notes

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