THE DEATH OF ME

"Gosh Cassie?! Is that you?" Perrie pulls me into a hug. I am caught off guard by it, almost forgetting to hug her back.

"Wait you know each other?" Zayn furrows his brows at us.
"Yes, Cass here took part in some drama today at work," Perrie steps up to him and kisses his lips.

"What kind of drama?" Zayn takes an interest, and I feel my cheeks blush.

"Well, one of the workers didn't show up and she was asked to stay another shift, however, her friend showed up and threw a fit telling the owner she is a miner and is not allowed to work more than 8 hours, and I was sure they would start boxing each other after that prick shoved Cass, and then he just fired her, just like that," Perrie finally stopped to take a breath.

"How did you get out?" I ask, wondering who is working instead of us.
"I don't care, I quit! I refuse to work for such a dick, you missed a big outburst," Perrie giggles, taking the whole situation lightly.

"Where is your friend by the way?"
"Harry? He is racing," I reply, making sure not to meet Zayn's eyes.

"Wait- Your Harry is your Harry?" She turns from me to Zayn in amazement.

"And your Cassie is apparently Harry's Cassie," Zayn frowns while looking from me to Perrie.
"I am not Harry's Cassie," I correct him, hurt by the look of disapproval on his face.

"What a small world this is! So you're going to watch the race with us? It's my first time here," Perrie gushes, oblivious to the discomfort on Zayn's and my face.
"We better take our seats before it starts," Zayn moves us along.

I follow Zayn and Perrie, my eyes following the smooth move of Zayn's hand to the small of Perrie's back, as he guides her to her seat.

I've never thought I will ever be in a relationship, always sure I will be that old woman who lives alone with a million cats at her feet, who goes crazy and yells at random people on the street. But hearing Zayn refer to me as 'Harry's Cassie', it did something to me, it made me think even for just a slight moment, that maybe I will have a chance of my own.

The place was full of people, no empty seats to be found. I wonder when Harry had decided he was going to bring me here, since we were seated in the very front.

The announcer lets the crowd know the racers stepping out and making their way to their cars.
I hear him call Ben's name and watch as he waves to the people as he strides to his red race car. The crowd was loud, more than it was when the names of the other racers were called.
"And last but not least- Your one and Only- Harry Styles!" The announcer's voice was drowned by the sound of the crowd chanting Harry's name, whistling and clapping as he paced to the black car I was in just a few days ago, his head tilted down in modesty, and a slight wave of his hand to his cheering fans.

I knew people knew of Harry and followed the race, but I haven't had a clue how big of a fan base he truly has.

The race began and I was up on my feet with Perrie and Zayn my eyes not leaving the black car, that soon enough passed the rest leaving them all far behind except of the red one, that was close behind.

It doesn't seem to take long for the race to end, the whole crowd shouting Harry's name as he steps out of his car, and pulls of the helmet. I can see those dimples of his from where I am standing and I can't help but smile too. Ben is out of the car soon after throwing his helmet to the ground. His eyes meet mine for a slight moment, and I see something in his glare, but before I can make it out he breaks our stare and walked away.

I move my gaze back to Harry, just in time to see a blonde curly girl run up to him and catch his cheeks in both her palms, pulling his face to her for a long sloppy kiss. I can feel my cheeks flush and I know Perrie and Zayn are watching me.

The flashing cameras are all over the place taking photos of them together.
The girl lets go of Harry and links their arms together as she snuggles up to him while they walk across the field.

When they grow closer to us, my eyes lock with Harry's, and there is this flash of something I cannot understand in his eyes. Perrie picks up on our stare and puts a hand on my shoulder.
The blonde by his side is looking up at him, than follows his gaze back to me, and a smirk appears on her lips.

"Let's go," Perrie whispers into my ear, and I turn to follow her and Zayn out of the arena.
When we are back in the quiet hallway I look up at Zayn and catch his eye.
"I told you we are just friends," I say, my voice sounding a little foreign to me.
He gives me a slight nod as he takes Perrie's hand in his.

It downs on me that deep down somewhere I was hoping something would come from this sudden and weird relationship I developed with Harry. But seeing the lady on his arm brought me back to reality, reminding me that nothing has changed. I am still the same nobody.
But I am all right, I know how to be that kind of person the best, and for Harry and this thing we had going these past couple of days, it was just a thing, and I am over it.

"I think I will head back home, I have school work that won't be done by itself," I say, trying to sound light and not caring.

"No, you are staying here, like Harry asked from you," Zayn tells me.

"No, I want to go home, and as you saw just before, Harry is busy," I snap.

"Look Cassie, this is for the best, trust me," Zayn replies softly.

"Yeah well, I need to go," I say turning around to fine my way out.

When I get close to the turn I hear a raspy voice and slow down.

"No, you cannot come with me, I don't even know what you're doing here in the first place," Harry says angrily.
"What do you mean? I came to see you race! You used to bring me here yourself remember?" A whiny voice sounds.
"Things have changed," Harry answers coldly.

"You gave my seat to that little girl!" The whiny voice taunts. my heart sinks when I am mentioned, and I feel annoyance when she calls me a little girl, wanting to go up to her and inform her I just turned 17 a few months ago which means I am not as little as she might think I am. Instead I resume my pace looking straight making sure not to look sideways at them.

"She is not a little- Cassie? What the fuck?" I hear Harry call out. It takes everything I have not to stop and wait for him.

"I thought I told you to stay with Zayn?!" He yanks my arm, bringing me to a stop, causing me to nearly fall over, though his tight hold stops me.

"Yeah well, you should learn by now that I don't follow your orders," I snap back.
"Good luck with that one," I hear the whiny voice and look up to see the blonde staring at me.
She has too much makeup on and her hair looks stiff form hairspray.
"Lola go away," Harry hisses.

I watch her turn wondering who might she be, being Harry was kissing her a moment ago and shouting at her now.
"And you! You cannot walk around here like this!" His angry eyes find mine.
"Why not?!" I ask pulling my arm away from him, and he finally lets me go.
"Because I said so, and you should start listening to what I say," He folds his arms, standing straight and I can't help but note how much taller than me he actually is.

"Goodbye Harry," I sigh turning to leave.
"Where do you think you are going? I am talking to you!" He booms after me.
"Home!" I say nonchalant.
He really isn't used to people disobeying him, not knowing what it's like to hear the word 'no' said to you.

"And how would you get home?" He questions.
I haven't thought about that, forgetting I'm not at my town and that I got here with Harry.

"I- I- by bus," I decide, continuing to pad along the floor to the exit.
"First off, you are going the wrong way, and second don't be silly, I'll take you home," He gives in, the annoyance in his voice moderated.

I stop and turn to face him, knowing I am better off going with him than getting on a bus.
"Fine," I sigh, letting him guide us towards the right exit.

When we reach his motorbike, he pulls the helmet over my head, but instead of tightening the clasp, he holds on to the side with both hands staring into my eyes.

"There is a reason I asked of you to stay close to Zayn, it is not safe for you to be here alone, I would really appreciate it if you would listen next time,"
"Next time?" I question.
"Yeah, next time," He smirks his dimples showing.

He tightens the strap and puts his own helmet and gets on his bike. He offers his hand to help me up, and I take it in mine putting my other hand on his shoulder to help pull myself up.
As we exit the building to the car park, the flashes start and once again I am thankful for the helmet.

When we finally stop in front of my house, Harry helps me off.
"Did you have fun?" He asked grinning at me.
"I did, you were great," I say truthfully.
"Look, I'm sorry, you got fired because of me, and I will be true to my promise about helping to find you a new job," He says before driving away.
I wave goodbye and climb the stairs to the house.

"Cassie?" My nana calls out to me.
"Yes Nan it's me, all right?" I walk into the kitchen. When I pass the stairs leading up to the first floor I notice a suitcase by the wall.
"Nan?" I ask when I find her sitting at the counter.
"Oh Cassie, I need to go to my sister for a few days, she is not doing well at all, I don't know how long I'll be,"
She looks tired and much older then I remember.

"Oh Nan, I hope she feels better soon, is there anything I can do to help?" I question reaching for her hand.

"No dear.. Well yes, I left a shopping list since I won't have time to go, I'm leaving in an hour.. I feel bad leaving you on your own," She sighs.
"Don't worry about me, I'll be fine, come back when she is all better," I assure her.
"You're absolutely lovely, do you know that?" Nan smiles up at me.
"Come on, you're biased," I giggle.

She then does the one thing that she can do to make me feel the most loved person on all the plant, she wraps her arms around me, and kisses my left temple.

"I love you Cassie, you remember that- always,"

Notes

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