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Dreaming Of You // If I'm Still Dreaming

'I’ll try to make you that mad all the time'

Like after the day I learnt her pictures were hanging all over my house, I practically couldn’t sleep the night before Jeanne’s thesis defence. I was so close but at the same time, so far away, lying in a Parisian hotel's bed without her. Anne wasn’t very sure of my strategy, but I preferred not to tell her daughter I was attending. She could have said something I didn’t want to hear… Because I was aware I hadn't been invited in the first place, but knowing Jeanne it didn’t necessarily mean the obvious. Nonetheless, and no matter what Louis could say about her being in love with me, I had to admit I was quite hurt by her attitude, and unhappy, and missing her miserably. To be quite honest I had a nightmare of a month, and this time it showed, as things went a bit out of control for me. I was caught drunk around LA in several occasions, and grumpy as hell the rest of the photos. So much was coming, but I needed to be there. Her thesis was what brought us together in the beginning. There couldn’t be a more symbolic moment to take my last chance, because it was my last chance. Deep down I knew it was.

I decided to go without the tie but I kept the rest as smart as I possibly could. That meant a black suit, a brand-new white shirt and actual shoes. Louis would have laughed at me. Once we headed the street I couldn’t help but start worrying. I had left LA without raising suspicions, so there was no reason to fear I could be expected in Paris, but still. Mad things happen all the time. One wrong move and I’m all over Twitter and the media. Pat tried to calm me down, but it was just impossible. My nerves were on edge, and the more we approached La Sorbonne, the more ready to explode I became, a strange mixture of emotions swarming me non-stop. I was going to see her… She was going to hate me… It was going to be like the bookstore all over again.

Following the instructions Anne sent me through text messages I finally arrived to the majestic corridor where she was waiting for me. It was like seeing Jeanne in a quarter century… Not too tall, slender and as if a string was pulling from her head up. Tight, black Angora jumper; long, black pencil skirt, and high heels. Such sophistication and yet such naturalness… How could they be like this? It had been a while since we last had seen each other, and I became nervous as hell, but as soon as Anne saw me she smirked devilishly, and pushing her long dark brown hair aside she came to hold me dearly. She kissed my cheek murmuring some compliments on my looks and I couldn’t help but smile, and even relaxed a bit. I quickly introduced her to Pat and as we began to walk she explained they were all gathered in the antechamber of the actual lecture theatre where the defence was going to take place, and that Jeanne wasn’t there at the moment, as she was doing some paperwork. I deeply breathed in. Not just yet…

Once I stepped inside the room I found quite a large group of people, some of them I had never seen before. Luckily, neither Antoine, the German goalkeeper nor the hipster musician were anywhere in sight. As I curiously kept glancing around I noticed a few guys whom I supposed were just Jeanne’s research colleagues, but they made me feel anxious anyway. What if she was seeing one of them? No, there was no way… But we had been apart for three months, and what we had was merely casual… I shifted uncomfortable, trying to shake the bad feeling off. Unknowingly Lolo helped me in the task, as he kindly approached me to greet me and even introduced his mum to me. It seemed that due to Jeanne’s thesis she had become a massive Liam’s fan. She was so funny and absolutely adorable, and by her attitude it really showed how deeply fond of Jeanne she was. She spoke about her with such love and pride as if it was her own daughter. And then Lolo. I ended up being very fond of him. He surely was a sharp dude, so open and frank as Jeanne, and he seemed to like me too, and that was a big deal because he was her best friend after all. For some reason I timidly began to feel thrilled to be there, though I was unable to loosen up.

At some point while talking to Lolo and Julie I felt a hand running through my back. I turned around all shaky and hopeful, but it wasn’t Jeanne but Maurice, who smiled broadly and gave me a tight embrace, to repeat the action later on with Pat. Anne soon joined us, smiling from ear to ear. She was ecstatic. Only then I truly came to understand how huge it was that Jeanne were becoming a Doctor.

Anne had brought a medium height, blonde, curly-haired girl with her, who turned out to be Jeanne’s German friend Mara, the one from Munich. She was quite hot, but nothing like Jeanne. After she greeted Maurice, with whom she seemed thoroughly acquainted, she stood by my side, lifting her gaze to me as if she were inspecting me or something.

“So you are Harry…” She said, amused, after a brief moment when everyone was looking away from us. By the tone of her voice I figured she was well aware of the nature of my relationship with Jeanne. Sexual.

“Last time I checked I was…” I claimed flirtingly, bending down a bit and pushing my hands behind my back.

“I watched your film with Jeanne a year ago…” I nodded, showing interest. I wanted to know where she was leading to, though I hoped she wouldn’t mention any German footballer. “Aren’t you going to ask me what I thought?” Then I knew what she was trying to do.

“No,” I grinned cheekily, with a slight shake of my head.

“Hmm…” Mara smirked mischievously, taking a finger to her lower lip. It was as if I could hear her thoughts. ‘You, witty motherfucker…’ Point to Mr. Styles. We both laughed.

“So you are Mara…–––I muttered. Are you thrilled to have Jeanne living in Munich next year?” I wasn’t very fond of the idea, but I needed to act cool about Jeanne.

“Oh, she’s not going…”

I frowned and her eyes suddenly widened as if she had realised something. But when I was about to ask for clarification someone called my name behind my back. The tall brunette couldn’t be other than Stan’s friend, Alicia, the professor, with that Yorkshire accent. She was quite proactive as he said she was. Alicia quickly took me aside and introduced me to the guy who was going to officiate as my interpreter, as the defence would be in French. We shook hands while nodding at each other. She didn’t need one as I learnt that she was fluent in the language. I was starting to feel dizzy by so many introductions in such a short period of time. And where the hell was Jeanne? I was about to explode from expectation. As I returned my anxious gaze to the room I noticed an unknown presence talking to Anne. Alicia leant closer and told me it was in fact Guillaume, Jeanne’s thesis director. I gulped hard.

College professors aren’t supposed to look like this… Since Louis and Niall first mentioned him back in June I had pictured an ugly, bald, wrinkled old man… By all means I wasn’t expecting a tall, messy-haired, bearded, bohemian, thirty-five years old guy looking almost as smart as me in a white shirt. My insides trembled. What the freaking hell? She used to call him her ‘owner’… How stupid I was for not learning more about him. But when jealousy was about to overtake me completely I noticed Jeanne’s figure standing right behind him, and Anne murmuring something to her ear. My heart melt inside my chest, and my knees went absolutely weak. God, how much I had been missing her.

Jeanne confusedly glanced around until her eyes locked with mine, as I stared at her, inwardly screaming for her attention. She passed her mother and Guillaume and began to make her way over to me. I held her gaze but as soon as I realised she was dressing as a man I almost dropped to the floor. She was wearing a black suit like mine, and a white shirt with a black tie… Her hair was tied in a low ponytail and her lips had deep red lipstick on them. I had never seen her using trousers before… How could she be like this? I just wanted to die right there. How could she be so freaking hot and daring? God, she was pure sex… I needed to pull myself together quickly and keep my coolness at all cost.

“What are you doing here?–––she murmured through gritted teeth once she stood in front of me. How did you…?” Oh, she was crossed.

“Anne,” I interrupted her with a smirk. I could only rely on my adorable factor to break her guard down. “She’s in my team.” Jeanne deeply breathed in and turned around to look at her mum, who waved her hand playfully.

“I will murder her,” Jeanne muttered under her breath, turning to face me again. I came a bit closer, shivering at her nearness. I wanted to hold her so badly.

“She’s just trying to help… me. Trying to help me,” I grinned. Jeanne closed her eyes and lightly shook her head. “You figured out everything with that call, isn’t it?” I asked softly, bending down. She knew what I was talking about. “Why did you go to the hotel?”

“Because I was mad.”

“Well, I’ll try to make you that mad all the time–––I claimed, smiling. In fact I’m quite good at making you mad. Look at me, crashing your viva voce, all cheeky…” Jeanne glared.

“This is a serious matter, Harry–––she whispered, her full, crimson lips assuming the most inciting shapes. You shouldn’t be here.” As she gestured with her hand I captured it with mine. How good it felt just to touch her skin.

“Yes, I should, and I am–––I stated boldly. We are in this together. This is our thing–––I motioned my finger to point at both of us. Since London, until now…” Jeanne inhaled deeply again, looking right into my eyes. I couldn’t tell if she was still mad, but I liked it when I was able to impose my arguments over hers, which happened very rarely. A door opened at our side and Jeanne glimpsed at me one more time, though she said nothing, and turned away to walk into the room. I let go of her hand but Anne caught her along the way.

“Il tuo rossetto, Gianna.” Grabbing her by the chin, Anne fixed her make-up with a lipstick she took from her daughter’s pocket, Jeanne wrestling a bit. I couldn’t help myself and chuckled. She could be one hell of a woman, but to her mother she was still her little girl. “Babbo sarebbe fiero di te.” Anne lightly rubbed the tip of her nose on Jeanne’s cheek, cupping the other on her hand. I didn’t understand what she said, but Jeanne grinned, glimpsing down.

I watched her get inside, as all the people in the antechamber began to move nervously. As he passed my side, Guillaume flashed me a rather evident displeased look. Did he know who I was? The scene I just witnessed a moment earlier must have been Anne telling him I was there. For sure he did know me way before that day. It wasn’t for nothing I was the star and he and his research team were studying my ass. I bet he also saw how I held Jeanne’s hand and realised we knew each other, probably intimately. I didn’t get him though… Was his attitude because of the compromised objectivity, as Louis suggested once? I just half shut my eyes at him and made my way inside followed by my interpreter. Jeanne’s Madison Square Garden was about to begin.

–.–.–

Notes

Let's enjoy these last moments of calm before the beginning of the big bang. So many things are coming up and if you ask me how much Harry will manage to handle, then I should answer 'none of it,' as always :D But this is why we like him, isn't it? Because he's cluelessly adorable?

Thank you so much for all the reading, voting and feedback! It keeps me going, especially now when bringing everything together for the end has become quite a heavy task. I'm working as fast as I can, believe me. I don't want to leave you hanging for too long. Hope you enjoy the ride. Love you all <3

Comments

miss you a lot friend,
message me sometime if you have the chance ❤️

cococranberry cococranberry
3/13/19

You promised you would never make us wait for an update that long again... *cries*

JasperRenee JasperRenee
7/3/18

Hello,

I hope your life is everything that you want it to be. It seems like the past couple of months have really changed my perspective of the world, and how much you need to appreciate the little things in life. You never know when life will snatch them away from you.

I have really appreciated all that you have done for me. I miss your constantly developing plot, and your infinitesimal points of detail. In other words, I miss this story so much.

I feel like so much has happened since the last time you updated. I hope you know that I am always eagerly awaiting your next chapter. Even if it's 5 years from now, and I am a fully licensed Speech Language Pathologist, I will try my best to keep up my support. Maybe next year while I am studying abroad in Italy you will find the motivation to continue. Who knows what's going to happen. Maybe I should take the quote from the t-shirt I am currently wearing. "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know you're gonna get."

Thanks,
Morgan

Oh no, and then the moment came there's no next chapter anymore! What do I have to do with my spare time now?!
On a serious note: I loved loved looooooved your story so far. I loved the way the sequel wasn't the same as 'Dreaming of you'. Another timeset, other places, other people getting involved, and the tension being build up from the beginning till now. Their 'relationship' didn't went back to the way things were in France 4 years ago, it needed time to get together again and in a different way (happy about their love right now, but after 111 chapters I know things can change...). I really loved the way you wrote about Mark Owen as being Jeanne's 'Boyband crush'. I've been such a big fan of Take That and Mark was my first true love when I was 11 or so. His picture was hanging above my bed, wich I kissed goodnight every night. (I guess I've just spilled my age, haven't I? ;-) )
When I read the last comments, I think your last update was from 2 months ago. I really hope you can find the time, the energy and the inspiration to finish this story, because I'm hooked! Give me a warning when you'll write a book, I will be in front of the bookstore, waiting!

Love, Leah



Dear You,

I've started reading this story two days ago. From the very first chapter I'm hooked and I can't stop reading. I don't want to go out, I don't want to sleep, I just want to read. Not to know how it will end actually, because I don't want it to end! So I try to find a balance between reading fast en making it last a little bit longer. I'm a fan of Harry from the day Sign of the times has released, so I have a lot of catching up to do. When you mention a song or a situation with One Direction, I look for it on Google or YouTube. So you're helping me to get to know the world of Harry and 1D, thank you for that! I've been to Paris a couple of times, It's such a beautiful city. I have good, romantic, memories of the times I've been there. You're writing about the city is so accurate and lively, it feels I'm there again by reading. My heart nearly broke for Harry and Jeanne when I read the last chapter of Dreaming of you. Happy to know there's a sequel, I going to start reading that now. I just wanted to write you this, because in the notes below the chapters you seem like a very nice, caring person. Thank you for writing such a beautiful story! (I hope my writing makes sence, English isn't my native language so I know I make a lot of mistakes. I'm sorry!)
Love, Leah