Spelling and Grammar: There are a couple of grammar mistakes. I'm going to use this as an example. When you say you are something, make sure it makes sense. Like you had, I am virgin. Make it like, I am a virgin. It makes it better to read and it flows easier. Just reread it and you'll find your errors because you had a couple of sentences like that. Other than that, everything else is good.

Plot and Story Line: I've never read anything like this. It's very unique and I'm hooked. I like the part where she punches Harry in the face. That's just so funny. Especially how he thinks every girl is supposed to fall for him. I can't wait until you update!

I would give this story a 9/10 for grammar.

Notes

If I was a bit offensive, please tell me and I'll take your review down. I'm just being honest and giving you tips on what to do and what not to do. I'm trying to help you improve and that's my main goal of doing reviews. I'm not trying to be mean in anyway.