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Reviews with the Reader

Disney Dreaming

This fanfiction is exceptional! I really love the originality to it, and I would love to see more of it in the future. There were just some minor things that through me off a little bit.

I'm going to start off with the biggest thing first, then work my way down to smaller things. So first off, I kind of want to see more of the story, and by this I mean try to go in order. A lot of times I would get the characters mixed up in my head, and it would become confusing. I can see what your trying to do though, and you do put the story under the chapter. At the beginning of the chapter put what story it is also, because if the reader is scrolling through the chapter they don't see the sub-headings. for example they see;

Chapter 5
*Bri's (Briar Rose/Aurora) POV*

That can become a little confusing, so if you try;

Chapter 5
-Sleeping Beauty-
*Bri's (Briar Rose/Aurora) POV*

This way the reader who is scrolling through the chapters as they read can see what story they are reading.

Also you had little grammar errors, but there were a few that stood out. When you are listing things be sure that if you are going to use the colon format that you use a colon and not a semi-colon. for example in your Sleeping Beauty chapter I saw;

My parents when I was little sent me to live with my Aunts; Mary, Flo, and Fauna.

In this situation you would use a colon, because you are listing three or more names (you would also do this for objects). So instead you can write it like;

My parents when I was little sent me to live with my Aunts: Mary, Flo, and Fauna.

Its a really easy fix! There were also some smaller grammar errors, but if you read over your finished product once or twice you will catch those smaller mistakes.

Overall I think this is a great idea, who would have thought that Disney and One Direction would go pretty well together! It's a very original idea and I give you props for that, because I kind of get tired of seeing the cliche stories.

Overall Rating: 8.5

Notes

Notes If you do not like the review that was given to you for any reason at all let me know, and I will take it down ASAP. I hope I helped you with creating a better story!

❤ This_Crazy_Girl

Another Note; So most of you have seen my new co-authors work! I hope you guys like them, because you will see more of them in the future. :D

Comments

@Oops_Hi

Hii! Yeah I'm still (kind of) active. I could probably do it, but it could be a while I usually get on like once a week. But I might be able to make some time. c: can't wait!

This_crazy_girl This_crazy_girl
8/27/15

ntEeeyyyyy back again this account use to be called Goldenheart. You reviewed Secrets(use to be called Stand), and Captured which both times helped, so I got another Fanfic if you do not mind checking out its just the start of it though. It's Called Angles and Demons. please and thank you I dont know if you are still active though. and if you wouldnt mind please do another review of Secrets since we added a lot. again please and thank you.

Hi_Oops Hi_Oops
8/21/15

Could you do A Feeling That I Can't Fight? It was my first fanfiction and I don't know how I did on it. Please and thank you ;D

I don't know if I asked yet or not lol but coukd you please review my story (how you changed my life) because its my first fanfic ever and I would like on advice and would like to know how I'm doing

Please can you review my story (I am addicted to you). I would like to know what people think of it. <3