Forever Alone

He moved in close and you could almost feel his lips on yours. Judith, please don’t chicken out this time. Just kiss the damn boy and just feel the passion in that kiss. You leaned in closer to him trying to transfer your breath over to him. He started to push you up against the end of the couch. His hands were on the sides of you. His face lingered just above yours. He wanted you, Judith. Just seize the moment. Kiss him now Judith.

Your hands were wrapped around his neck and your legs were wrapped around his waist. He was just so hot to you and you wanted him more than anything. Stop putting thoughts about me in here when I’m not even thinking that. Of course I want him. Of course he was just so hot that I wanted to fuck him right then and there but I wasn’t ready. Woah, Judith we aren’t talking about fucking here. We are just talking about kissing. Oh I want to kiss him alright. I want to kiss those pale pink lips of his that are so moist. Can you see his eyes how full of lust? He wants me! When Steve said that to me that broke us up! Could Niall want the same thing from me? Judith, he said he wasn’t going to fuck you now. Oh, okay. Did you forget? Yes, I’m just so living in the moment that I forgot about what he said. Judith, just calm down and kiss him.

His face was just inches from yours. He was doing this to you to pay you back from before. He wanted to make you want him like he wanted you. He could tell you were getting aggravated with him. He moved just above your lips. He smiled and just before he was about to kiss you he pulled away.

“Karma’s a bitch isn’t it,” he laughed just inches away from your face.

“What?” you asked

“I’m not going to kiss you. Well if you beg me,” he told you.

“Niall, please kiss me,” you pretended to whine.

He moved his lips to your ear, “You don’t mean that.”

“Niall, please kiss me. I’m fucking begging you,” you whined loudly.

“Fine whatever you say,” he leaned down to you again.

“Hiiiiiiiiiyyyyyyyeeeee!” Bridgette shouted as she came through the door with Rachel in tow.

“Fuck!” you muttered as Niall pulled away.

“Oh what do we have here,” Rachel smiled her mischievous smile at you and Niall were still intertwined with each other.

“If you wanted to get your freak on you could’ve called Judith,” Bridgette answered as she left to go to the fridge.

“We weren’t doing that,” you told her as you untangled yourself from Niall.

“Just remember to wrap that shit up,” Rachel laughed as she joined Bridgette at the fridge.

“Don’t mind us we are going to bed now,” Bridgette smiled as she left with Rachel muttering about you guys probably.

“Sorry,” you told Niall as he was standing facing the TV. His back was towards you.

“It’s okay,” he answered.

“No, they ruin everything,” you replied.

“I got to go anyway,” he made his way to the door and you followed him.

You stood at the door with him, “I’m really sorry.”

“It’s okay love,” he kissed your cheek, “Until next time.”

“Next time the animals won’t come bursting through the door,” you laughed.

“Next time we will be at my place,” he winked, “No one can disturb us there.”

“You aren’t getting into my pants that easily,” you commented as you watched him walk to his door.

“We’ll see about that,” he smiled at you as he got to his door.

“Night Niall,” you called out.

“Night Moody Judy,” he laughed as he stepped into his door.

He kissed my cheek and it was the best feeling in the world. It means everything to me and it was just enough. It felt right. It was right for right now. I don’t need a passionate kiss in the rain right now. It was enough. It felt right. Nothing else could ruin this moment. I was on cloud nine.

You shut the door and placed your back against it. This is the happiest you have been since moving here. Before that it was when you first kissed Steve but you said that kiss didn’t feel right. There was no spark. Hopefully with Niall it will be different. You rested your head against the door taking in all that has happened. He wanted you. He didn’t want the model girl that lived downstairs. He wanted you. Who knows how much of you he wanted but he wanted it.

You opened your eyes and scanned the room. In the hallway you saw your two best friends just smiling at you. You could see that they were happy for you. You smiled back at them as you glided to your bedroom.

“Is his dick nice?” Bridgette asked

Most people don’t know Bridgette. She can be quiet at first but when she gets comfortable with someone she lets them know what’s on her mind. She can be perverted yet her comments are always so funny. She has been your friend for a long time and you couldn’t imagine being friends with anyone else. She completed you. She has been there for you since day one. She can be funny at times yet when you need a shoulder to cry on she is always there to tell you that it is okay.

“It’s beautiful,” you turned around and smiled at her.

“Did you use protection?” Rachel asked

“We didn’t do anything,” you explained.

“Sure ya didn’t? What’s this about you going to his place?” Bridgette hinted

“Well, he was about to kiss me but you nimrods came pouncing through the door and ruined the moment. I never properly thanked you for that,” you replied.

“You little slut,” Bridgette laughed.

“Yup, I’m a slut,” you answered sarcastically.

“Bridgette, don’t be so hard on her. She wasn’t there tonight with you and Harry,” Rachel answered.

“Don’t mention it to her,” Bridgette whispered.

“Were you and Harry getting it in?” you asked

“Hell nah! I don’t roll that way!” she exclaimed

“Right!” you answered

“I’m serious. I would never act like that,” Bridgette replied.

“That’s not what I saw,” Rachel commented.

“What did you see Rach?” you asked

“She was grinding Harry like no tomorrow,” Rachel commented.

“He enjoyed himself,” Bridgette smiled.

“I’m sure he did,” you answered as you made your way into your room.

Days passed and you and Niall hung out. You guys weren’t making out and he hasn’t tried to kiss you in days. You were disappointed. You wanted your lips to latch onto his. You think there is going to be some sweet sensation running through your veins when you kiss him which might cause you to feel more alive than you ever have felt in your whole entire life. When you weren’t thinking about kissing him you were enjoying his company. One day while you were preparing a presentation for your one class he came over and helped you finish it. He put in his input having no idea what the topic was about and he seemed intrigued. You taught him about the lesson and he seemed to enjoy it. He was becoming quite the friend to you. He kissed your cheek here and there but nothing else. Somehow you were okay with it even though deep down inside you wanted to kiss him.

Tonight you were going out with your friends. Tonight you guys were celebrating. You and your friends have landed your first job. After you guys graduate in the spring you will preparing for your job. You couldn’t wait for fall to come because you would be living your dream. You were going to be the best teacher you could be. You have been student teaching alongside some of the best teacher you have ever seen. It reminded you of your school days back when you were a little girl. The kids love you and you love teaching them. But you weren’t going to spend the night talking about your students you were going to party.

Your friends all got dressed in short tight dresses. You really didn’t like your figure but this dress made you feel wonderful. You finally felt hot for once in your life. You weren’t one to flaunt off your figure but tonight you felt good on the inside and on the outside. You were ready to show people how sexy you could really be. Judith, you just want to show Niall how hot you can be hoping to steal a kiss from him. Hey I can dream can’t I? I guess Judith, I guess.

You finished putting on your light shade of makeup and met up with your friends in the living room. You were the last one to finish and you noticed five boys standing in your living room. Their eyes were brought from their conversation to you. You could see the smile form across Niall’s face. You put your head to the floor and walked closer to them.

“Damn girl you look sexy,” Bridgette commented.

“Thanks B,” you smiled at her.

“Someone is hoping to get laid,” Louis muttered.

“Hey I’m a girl. I have needs,” you laughed and Louis laughed with you.

“Judith, you didn’t have to dress so provocative,” Rachel whispered.

Rachel is like a mother to you guys. She always comments on your choice of clothes. Rachel always tells you guys to embrace your beauty and flaunt it. Well, now you were flaunting it. Rachel, don’t get your panties in a bunch. Just enjoy the night. Hey she is looking out for me. She doesn’t want me to get picked up by a random guy. She wants me to be safe. I can’t help it if I look like a slut. She just wants what is best for me. Okay, I understand.

“Do you want me to change?” you ask her

“Hey, if you want random guys hitting on you then by all means stay like that,” she replied.

“It’s not like anyone I know is giving me any action,” you regretted the words that came out of your mouth.

You knew he knew you were talking about him. Now he was never going to talk to you again. You didn’t even want to look at him. You wanted to take those words back right now. You wanted to rewind and just change the phrase that slipped off your tongue. Oh god this is going to suck now. He is never going to kiss me. He is never going to forgive me. Judith, he might kiss you, you never know. He could take this as your way of pushing him. I don’t think so. Trust me Judith something will happen tonight. Have I ever been wrong? Yes.