Forever Alone

Niall looked at you. Did he not get it? John and you were no longer together. And that kiss that you two just shared was the best thing that has ever happened to you. It was magical and everything you have wished for. It was perfect like him.

“John your boyfriend,” he commented.

“He broke up with me tonight,” you told him.

“I’m sorry Judith,” he told you.

“It’s fine. Like you said, distance can do a number on a relationship. I think he was in love with the girl he works with anyway,” you answered.

“So what does that mean for us?” he asked

“What about us?” you asked

“Where do we go from here?” he asked

“I don’t know,” you answered.

“Judith, I know I shouldn’t push you but just know that I really care about you,” he leaned in to kiss you again but you pulled away with your face resting on his shoulder.

“I can’t Niall. Not now,” you whispered.

“I’m sorry,” he hugged you.

“Give it time,” you told him.

“You will be worth the wait,” he answered.

You guys sat in your hug for quite some time. Your phone started ringing and you saw that it was Bridgette. She had texted you asking you where you were. She didn’t want another one of her friends disappearing on her. You told her that you were on your way back. You also told her that you found Niall.

Niall hopped off the rock and put his hand out for you. You intertwined your hands in his and you thought about the boys’ song Little Things. Your hand fits in mine like it’s made just for me. Judith, you like that song don’t you. Yeah it felt right to start singing it. Judith, he cares about you. Just give it time and it will all play out.

You and Niall walked back to your car hand in hand. Was it weird that you felt safe with his hand in yours? You really didn’t want to start a relationship right now. You have just gotten out of one and so did he. You didn’t want to rush things. You didn’t want to ruin what you have right now. It feels right for right now. Why ruin something that feels right?

You got back to your car in one piece. Niall sat in the passenger seat and rested his head against the headrest. He was tired from his adventure for one night. You looked at the clock and saw that it was four in the morning. The boys weren’t leaving until tomorrow. You wanted Niall to get some sleep tonight. You drove down the winding roads of the wilderness until you came to a familiar road that you knew so well.

You turned into the parking deck for your apartment building. You pulled next to Bridgette’s car and turned off your car. You looked at Niall who was snoring a little bit. You shook him a bit and he quickly woke up. He stretched and looked at you. A huge smile crept across his face and you could feel yours forming too.

You guys walked into your building taking the elevator up to your floor. Niall stood next to you yawning every so often. You were tired too but you didn’t know what was going to happen once you walked through your apartment door. You guys reached your floor and you both walked up to your door. You placed your hand on the door knob and turned it and opened the door. You walked through the door first. The boys were all on your couch watching TV. Bridgette was on Harry’s lap while Rachel was on Liam’s. They all turned their heads when they saw the two of you walk through the door. Everyone got up off the couch and hugged you tightly. Bridgette and Rachel were crying as they hugged you. They told you never to do that again. The boys were so happy that Niall was back. They couldn’t be without him.

After the hugging fest everyone all left. The boys had to catch their flight tomorrow morning. They all left to catch up on their sleep. You hugged them all goodbye leaving Niall for last. You and Niall have reached a new level of your relationship. Who knows where it is going to go from here. All you can do is wait. You parted ways with your friends. You crawled into your bed. You weren’t as devastated as you were at first from when John had broken up with you. Who knows maybe you were accepting the fact that there are other people out there for you. Then again the one you truly care for lives down the hall. But he was leaving and that’s going to be hard on you too. Could you deal with this pain again? Then again you aren’t dating him. You guys are just friends. Then again you love him. Maybe.

The day arrived for when the boys were leaving. They had invited you to the airport with them. Rachel and Bridgette wanted to say goodbye to their boyfriends and you promised that you would tag along. Plus you wanted to say goodbye to the boys too. They were your friends after all. You were going to miss there shenanigans that they had down the hall. It was going to be quiet for the next couple of months. Hopefully this will go by fast and that once you blink your eyes then they will return.

You guys all arrived at the airport. Bridgette and Rachel were already crying in their boyfriends’ arms. You just chuckled to yourself. Louis came over to you and hugged you one last time. Zayn hugged you too and you took in the sweet smell of his aftershave. He always smelt good. Then again they all smelt good. You hugged Liam and Harry after they were done making out with Rachel and Bridgette. It made your stomach churn a bit.

The last person you had to hug was Niall. His blue eyes sparkled back at you. He wasn’t smiling because he knew that he was leaving. He was leaving you behind when you needed someone. Then again he knew you had Bridgette and Rachel so you weren’t really alone. He wrapped you in a hug. Your head rested against his chest. You listened to his heart beat begin to pick up. He was nervous. He had nothing to be nervous about. After you guys pulled out of your hug he faced you one last time.

“Judith, I’m just a phone call away if you need anything,” he told you.

“I know,” you whispered.

“Judith, I love you,” he told you.

“I love you too,” you answered and he kissed your forehead.

After he left to catch the plane and he was out of sight you cried. These weren’t the tears you cried when Steve use to beat you. These weren’t the fake tears that you cried when John broke up with you. These were actual tears. These tears were all your emotions pouring out. You were falling for him. Scratch that. You were already in love with him yet he was gone now. All you got to do is wait. You weren’t his girlfriend but you know that he loves you like him.

A drop in the ocean. A change in the weather. I was praying that you and me might end up together. It’s like wishing on rain as I stand in the desert. But I’m holding you closer than most ‘cause you are my heaven. Judith, more song lyrics? Yes. I think I’m starting to realize that I love him and he is everything to me. I love him.

Your tears are real Judith. Don’t think that they aren’t. You said it yourself. You are in love with him. So cry until you can’t cry anymore. You love him and he will be yours someday. You just got to be ready for it. Judith, he won’t be away for forever. Distance can’t keep him away. Song lyrics from you? What can I say Judith? You have grown on me. I like that song too. What song Judith? Give Me the World by New Empire. Distance won’t keep me away. This distance won’t keep me away from you. Won’t keep me away from you.